My Horrible Ex-Husband

Chapter Five: The Most Horrible Thing I Could Ever Do

Eli was already starting to get on my nerves. Now, I see why we were separated for this long. Sometimes I can’t stand being in his presence. He’s so demanding sometimes. Caleb, can you wash the dishes? Caleb, can you take out the trash? Caleb, can you pass the remote? Caleb! Caleb! Caleb! God, I’m going to change my gotdamn name. If I hear Caleb one more time, I’m swear a blood vessel is going to burst in my head.

“Caleb, I’m going out to the beach,” Eli muttered. “Want to come?”

“No thanks,” I replied flipping through a magazine.

“Sam’s going to be there,” Eli teased. I placed the magazine down, narrowing my eyes at him. He was lying. This was a ploy to get me out on the beach, but why? That was the question.

“I thought you don’t like me flirting with Sam,” I retorted. “What happened to don’t flirt with my best friend? Huh? What happened to that?”

“I was kidding Caleb,” Eli replied. “You can flirt with whomever you want to. Just come on out to the beach with me, please.”

“Why do you want me to go out to the beach with you so bad?” I asked curiously.

“Because I think a little sun will be good for you,” he said. “Now – let’s go!”

“I don’t trust you,” I retorted. “I really don’t.”

“Fine Caleb,” he sighed. “Don’t come outside with me. I was just trying to be nice. I really want us to be friends.”

“Friends? Please,” I chuckled. “Now, I know you’re lying. We weren’t even friends when were married.”

“Don’t be a dick,” Eli sighed rolling his eyes.

“I’m not,” I said nonchalantly. “We were just two people who had sex who just happened to be married.”

“Now you’re just hurting my feeling deliberately,” he said sarcastically.

“The truth hurts sometimes,” I retorted.

“Dad – why don’t you go out to the beach?” Michelle asked jumping into the conversation.

“Not interested,” I replied. Now things were starting to get stranger – Michelle was trying to get me out of the house too. What the hell was going on? What were they plotting against me? I definitely wasn’t leaving this house now. Michelle and Eli had some ulterior motives.

“See Michelle wants you to get out too,” Eli chuckled.

“And now I’m definitely staying in,” I replied.

“Great,” Eli said walking out of the living room. A moment passed before I processed what was happening. They were trying to mind fuck me. He wanted me to stay inside, so he asked me to go out. He was using reverse psychology on me. The little bastard – he thought he had me. I tossed my magazine onto the table and slid into my sandals, marching outside.

I moved outside to see Eli, Sam and Nick drinking beers and grilling out on the beach. Eli winked as soon as he caught sight of me, moving through the sand. I bit my lip, not quite understanding what was going on. Did he want me inside or outside? He was successfully mindfucking me right now. I could not read his motives. He was beating me and I did not like it one bit.

“Hey Caleb,” Sam said a bright smile on his face. “How are you?”

“Wondering why Eli is being so nice today?” I snorted. “Excuse me, Sam. Eli, come here.”

I narrowed my eyes at him as he moved towards me. He gripped a beer from the cooler and handed it to me.

“Here,” he said a grin on his face.