Blue Summer

Chapter 7: Ibuki's new job, the first day

The troubles for Ibuki had rooted themselves not when his father ended his life but long before Ibuki was even born. They were more rooted in the politics of Korea than his father's personal incompetence. They were born not of his father's character but his national identity, of where he came from to where he came. But that part of him was something Ibuki's father had the least control over. He could not have changed his origins no matter what he did. Similarly, Ibuki could not change his origins. But while his father let his origins turn him into a coward who refused to stand up to the mistreatment he faced, Ibuki had somewhere in him the courage to fight if not for himself but for his family. His father wished to sacrifice nothing, but Ibuki was willing to sacrifice his education and dreams for his sister and mother. That is what made Ibuki different from his father. He may have tried to end his life, but the many chances God gave him to try again, he took them dearly and gave it his all. He may not have seen inside him valour, but he had it, and if he could realise it, he could face all his problems.

As Ibuki thought over and over, he made the decision of dropping out of the school to get a job and help his mother in expenses. He hadn't brought this proposal up in front of his mother; rather, he had gone to Misao seeking her support. He believed she would understand him and help him find a job. He did hesitate before telling her but then went ahead.

Misao looked at him in displeasure and confusion. She clenched her fists and loosened her lips to speak. But she pursed them as no word came to her in reaction. She fell silent, and Ibuki realised that her silence meant she would not give the support he was seeking so easily.

"Why?" she finally spoke with a shaky voice.

Ibuki sighed and replied, "I am doing it for my sister and mother."

"Why?" Misao hit his shoulder in frustration as her eyes filled with tears, "Why? Why? Why?!"

"I had to. I don't have any other choice. My mother cannot bear the expense of my and my sister's education. And I consider her education more important than mine, and I am willing to give up on mine for hers!"

"But you can still help without dropping out."

"No. Not everything is as you think it is. I cannot. I cannot get much money from my part-time jobs, which are very hard to handle alongside my studies. It may be easy for you, but not for me. You have your whole family doing so much for you. Why cannot I do that for my sister?"

Misao tried to hide her tears and gulped before saying, "You make everything difficult for yourself. Don't you?"

"No, I don't. And had your brother been in my place and you in my sister's, wouldn't your brother do the same. You are lucky enough to have what you have and thank God, you have it, but I don't. Stop comparing yourself with me. Our lives are different, and what you think is wrong, for me, is right."

Misao said no more except to ask Ibuki to leave and not return. She was furious with his decision and did not wish to speak to him.

"Leave and don't return to me. I do not want to talk to you. I am trying to help you overcome your trauma, but you are ruining it all. Thanks for telling me so I don't waste my time on you ever again."

This broke Ibuki from the inside. The one person he thought was his friend and would be there whenever he needed her had refused to talk to him rather than understanding his circumstances. His eyes filled with tears, and they slowly diminished Misao's figure in front of him. He closed his eyes and clenched his fists. For the first time ever since meeting Misao, he was angry with her, and struggling through his tears, he said, "I hate you, Misao!"

He left the house immediately, promising never to return to Misao for help. He had had enough and wanted to do what he thought was right for him and his family.