your love never is for me | billie eilish

1 | my secret

Abeline's pov:
(a-bel-lean)

I was finishing doing my makeup at my vanity when I got a facetime call from billie. As the call connected, I set up my phone on a perfume bottle to  keep it up.

"Hello?"  I said "Hi my love" Billie answered. "Why are you calling me" I patted my blush into my skin. "I just wanted to see you getting ready" she said " Plus sev isn't here yet and they're setting up the cameras or whatever"

I forgot to mention that billie had recently started filming a documentary. For a couple weeks now all I see when I go to her house is a big film crew and cameras everywhere. Being her best friend has me very involved in the doc, and I don't mind, I just feel very awkward  when every single conversation I have with her is now being filmed. For all I know, this phone call could be recorded right now.

"Oh, when is he supposed to get there" I asked the blue haired girl. "I don't know. I called  him an hour ago and he said he was on his way" I furrowed my eyebrows at the response. "An hour ago? billie, he probably isn't even coming, he says that every time."

"You don't know that, he said he genuinely feels bad he hasn't been able to make it" she said. I rolled my eyes and continued doing my makeup as she sat on the phone.

honestly I didn't want to talk about "sev" or whatever the fuck his name is nor do I give a fuck what it is.

All I know is I never liked him from the moment I knew he was 22. I don't know what billie is thinking about dating someone that old. I let her be because she's my best friend, but she knows how much I dislike that man.

"You look very pretty abby" she said as she took a live photo of me. I couldn't help but blush at her compliment.

"I'm just gonna get dressed and I'll be on my way"

"Okay bye love you"

"love you" I blew a kiss before I hung up.

-

As I entered billie's house, I was greeted by maggie.

Nobody understands how much I love her. She basically raised me after I left my childhood home and moved out here. As soon as I got my license, and raised enough money, I got an apartment in LA to be closer to my best friend.

"Hi darling, come in"

I smiled at her as I made my way to billie

"ABBY" she yelled as she embraced me in a hug

"Hi hunny" i said as i noticed a agitating presence in the corner of my eye

"Oh, hi brandon" i said in a dry tone

"Abeline" he shook my hand

I tried my hardest to keep all the dirty faces I wanted to make inside of me. Not that any of what we filmed was acting, but I just didn't want to look like a bitch on camera while all of this was going to go on tv.

-

After a few hours the camera crew left and it was just me,finneas, billie, and her dirty colored haired boyfriend.

"Um, i actually gotta go" brandon said as he looked at his phone

"What you told me you were going to stay the night" billie said

"My boy just called me, said he needed me"

"Okay just call me"

I glued my eyes to my phone to not intervene

"Yea" he said as he shut the door

I heard a sigh leave her mouth and I went over to where she was sitting

I pulled her into a hug letting her head rest on my chest

"You okay?" i asked

"Don't wanna speak on it"

This isn't the first time brandon has pulled something like this. Not even the second time. All the times I told billie "he's not good for you" "he's not a good person" she wouldn't listen.

And honestly who am i to have a say in her relationship, but I care so deeply for her and she's very blind to his actions

"Lets go" i said as i took her hand and led us to her room

I saw a dull expression on her face, with no emotion, no smile, nothing.

It hurts so much to see someone affect her the way he does.

I took her face in my hands and looked at her blue eyes

"Hey"

"Don't let him get to you okay?" i said

"I know that face and I know what you're thinking. Billie stop letting this man hurt you"

"I'll be okay i promise Abeline" she removed my hands and smiled

"Let's just lay down please I'm so tired."

I listened to her and laid on the bed while she hugged my torso and put her head on my chest

As i ran my hands through her hair and i heard her breathing even out and figured she went to sleep

I noticed a message from olivia

Olivia was one of my greatest friends back home, we always call and text because I forbid to drift away from her. I promised her once i raise enough money i'll fly her out to move in with me

"Hey wyd" she said

"Nothing just finished filming the doc"

"Are you still with billie?"

"Yea she fell asleep"

"Did you see your bestie seven"

I rolled my eyes and smiled. I told liv everything brandon would do that would make me dislike him. I don't spread around billie's business, i'm just worried about her.

"Not too much, he left like two seconds after filming was done"

"LMAO, he really is a weirdo i'll never understand why she's dating him"

"Yea who knows, i can't wait till the day she leaves him"

"Are you saying that as her friend or is it something else"

"Bro don't even start with ts, i'm telling you i'm gonna get over it"

"Abby if you like her you do, there's nothing wrong with it"

"I don't, it's just in my head. I'm gonna go to sleep now you know i hate talking about this"

"Okay goodnight queen"

"Goodnight liv"

I don't have feelings for billie, i just think i do because of the time we spend together. No matter what anyone tells me my feelings aren't valid it's weird to like your childhood best friend.

But she'll never know. right?

hey yall I havent wrote a book in three years so if ts is trash lmk and i'll change things up. Im gonna try my best to put a lot of time into it bc i genuinely have such good ideas abt what's gonna be in it. but yea enjoy!!