Chapter Thirty One

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Rody panicked, pulling Vince off the saw table. He didn't mean to push him so far, he was just angry. He didn't mean to hurt him.

He fell to the floor, the weight of Vince's body weighing him down.
"No- no no no!" He muttered, his breath hitching. He held Vince in his arms, his blood coating his arms and clothing.

"Vince I- fuck- I'm so sorry!" He sobbed, watching as Vince gasped quietly for air, the life slowly leaving his eyes.

Rody held him close, nuzzling his face against his head.

All the mixed emotions he felt from before washed away, and he was left sitting there in his own regret and grief.

He didn't mean to hurt him, he didn't mean to kill him. He was just angry! He didn't mean for this to happen.

He loved Vince, he didn't want him to die, he didn't want to be the one who killed him! He wasn't sure what he was going to do after the realization of him killing Manon, but he wasn't going to hurt him!

"Fuck- I-i didn't mean to.. I-im sorry!" Rody exclaimed, placing a bloodied hand against Vince's cheek.

Vince was already gone by this point, his eyes turning a dull grey. He knew Rody was sorry, he'd heard the way he panicked, the way he sobbed. He knew he didn't mean to do it, and that was enough to give him peace.

He never wanted to hurt Rody, never wanted to cause him this pain. But he did. He deserved this, but Rody.. Rody didn't.

He didn't deserve this pain, the pain of killing, of losing someone while they laid in your arms. He didn't deserve that.

"Vince.. p-please.. I'm sorry.." Rody muttered, holding Vince's cold lifeless body close against his chest.

"I-i didn't.. I didn't mean to.. please.." He sniffled, tears rolling down his cheeks onto Vince's skin.

"I-i love you..."

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It was late, extremely late. Everything was quiet, except for the loud banging that came from Richard's apartment door.

He groaned, sitting up in bed. Who the hell was knocking at this hour?

"Richard.. I've been woken up.." Lucas mumbled, sitting up in bed, yawning. Richard sighed, and sat up as well.
"I know.. I'll go check who it is." He said, getting out of bed.

Lucas got up as well, and stretched. "Fuck that, I'm coming with you so I can ki- beat the crap out of whoever's knocking." He said, following after Richard as they headed to the front door.

Richard yawned as he unlocked and opened it, Lucas standing behind him tired and pissed off. He had a thing about not wanting to be woken up.

They both immediately froze however, when they saw who was at the door.

It was Rody, trembling, crying, and covered in blood.

"Rody?.."

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Rody was hyperventilating, having one of the worst panic attacks of his life. He couldn't breathe, it felt like his chest was closing in on his lungs.

Fuck it hurt.

Rody has dealt with panic and anxiety attacks before, but this one was the worst. He felt like his body was trying to rip him apart, trying to punish him for what he did to Vince.

He felt so guilty, and the grief that washed throughout him was almost unbearable.

It was to a point he was thinking about just ending it, just so the pain would stop, and so maybe he could see them again.

Maybe, just maybe, he'd be able to see one of them again. God knows he doesn't deserve heaven anymore, there's only one place in the afterlife that would take him, and that place had someone he desperately wanted to see again.

Why did he have to do it? Why did he have to kill him?

He wanted to kill himself, but Lucas was watching him like a hawk, while Richard tried to figure out what to do.
Rody didn't need to tell them what he did, Lucas figured it out within a minute of him being there.

He was covered in blood, blood that wasn't his, and Vince wasn't with him. It was obvious what he did, especially with the way he was acting.

Lucas had been in Rody's position before, having killed someone he loved. He wanted to comfort him on the matter, but Richard didn't know about that, and Lucas planned to keep it that way.

"Hey, Richard, can you go grab a towel or something so I can help clean Rody off?" Lucas asked, walking over to Rody from where he was standing at.
"Yeah sure- I'll grab some.. clean clothes as well." Richard said, disappearing upstairs.

Lucas kneeled down In front of Rody, and sighed softly. "Rody, what happened that made you do what you did?" He asked, taking one of Rody's blood covered hands into his own.

Rody sniffled, looking at Lucas. He was shaking, horrible.

"Okay- nevermind.. you're too freaked out to talk, I understand." Lucas said, a cornered look on his face.
Rody squeezed Lucas's hand slightly, which got his attention.

He looked at Rody, tilting his head slightly. "I-i.. H-he killed m-my ex.." Rody mumbled, tears rolling down his cheeks.
He wasn't crying as bad as he had been before, but he still felt like absolute shit.

Lucas moved next to Rody, wrapping an arm around him. He didn't know what to say to that, besides the fact he taught Vince to do that shit.

Rody would probably get more upset if he learned Vince wasn't always the way he had been.

Richard came back, having a towel and clothes with him. He walked over to Rody and Lucas, and sat beside them, wrapping the towel around Rody.

"Rody, think you can follow us upstairs so you can shower?" Richard asked, his voice gentle and soft.
Rody sniffled slightly, and nodded weakly.

Lucas and Richard were caring, they weren't freaking out about the fact Rody murdered somebody. Well, Richard was but it was still okay.

They cared for Rody, he wasn't alone. He was safe.

He wasn't sure how long he'd be able to live with himself after what he just experienced, but at least he wasn't completely alone.


A/N

[And we've done it! We've reached the end! Honestly I could have made this chapter better, but I'm exhausted. I'm just glad I was able to finish this, and now I can focus on other things as well. Anyway, there will be bonus chapters as we all know, but those might not come out for a while. I'm really grateful for everyone who enjoyed this story! And I hope you guys stick around for what I have in store next!<3]

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