Luke's Diary: An Unlucky Man In A Zombie Apocalypse. Entries 1158 - 1358

Entry 1161: Sunday 1st December 2019

Entry 1161
Sunday 1st December 2019

Naomi IS a lesbian and she IS having sex with Roz! I heard it all with my own ears!

I decided to go round to Roz's flat and confront her with suspicions and have it out with her but when I arrived, I found that her front door was slightly ajar, and just as I was about to knock on the door, I heard Roz's and Naomi's voice coming from inside. Obviously intrigued I took a step closer to the door and started to listen in on what they were saying. I was horrified at what I heard! "Luke's getting suspicious," said Naomi, "He's acting all weird." "Well, there's nothing new there," said Roz. "You know what I mean," said Naomi, "I don't think I can keep this a secret much longer." "Well, you know what I think," said Roz, "I think you should just get it over and done with." "I just don't know what he's going to say," said Naomi sounding nervous. "Stop worrying," said Roz, "It'll come as a shock to him. Let's be honest; he won't have seen this coming, but at the end of the day it will all work out. There's going to be a happy ending. I just need to be sure that you really want to do this." "Oh, I do," said Naomi. "OK," said Roz, "Get your box out then. I want to have a look." My jaw nearly dropped to the floor! I couldn't believe what I was hearing! I heard some ruffling around. Probably Naomi taking her bl**dy clothes off. I tried to look through the gap between the door and the door frame but I couldn't see anything. "Nice," said Roz, "It looks so..." "You want to see my ring?" asked Naomi. "Obviously!" said Roz. Again, my jaw dropped to the floor. If this wasn't proof of the two of them having a sordid lesbian affair, I don't know what was. "What do you think?" asked Naomi, "Do you like the look of it." "It's amazing," said Roz, "Can I stick my finger in it?" My eyes nearly popped out of my head. I heard some movement as I tried to contain my shock. "What does it feel like?" asked Naomi. "It's nice to look at it but it feels a bit... Well, a bit dry," said Roz, "I think I need something to help me get my finger right in." "Just lick it a bit that might help," said Naomi. "Are you sure you're OK with me sticking my tongue in your ring?" asked. "Yeah, go on," said Naomi. I heard a bit of rummaging around and the sound of Roz moving her tongue around. I felt utterly outraged! "That's better," said Naomi, "Your finger slides right in the hole now." "Feels kind of nice," said Roz, "When are you going to tell Luke about what you've been up to?" "I need to pick the right moment," said Naomi, "I really have no idea how he'll respond." "I wouldn't be surprised if his eyes pop out of their sockets," said Roz, "Anyway, come here and look at my hairy handbag." Hearing Roz say this nearly did make my eyes pop out of their sockets! I heard some more rummaging around. "My God, that is hairy," said Naomi. "Do you like it?" asked Roz. "I love it," said Naomi, "It looks pretty big." "It is," said Roz, "Put your hand inside and have a good rummage around." "Oh, yeah," said Naomi, "It's like a Tardis. It's warmer than I thought too." "Yeah, I rubbed it against the radiator earlier on," said Roz, "I know you were coming round so I wanted to warm it up for you before your stuck your hand inside." I'd heard enough. I just couldn't listen to anymore. I stormed off and went back home.

When I arrived back home, Mum and Auntie Meryl could see I was in a mood and they asked me what was wrong. I lied and said nothing and turned upstairs to my bedroom where I paced up and down trying to slow my heart rate down. I wasn't upset – well, I was, but I was feeling more angry than upset. Roz and Naomi have both got together and not just betrayed me but made me out to look like an absolutely mug.

Later on, Naomi came round to see me. She knocked on the door and when I opened it, she was greeted with an unhappy expression. "Alright?" she said, as she started to walk inside. "What are you doing?" I asked as I extended my arm and pressed my hand against the door frame stopping her from coming in. "I'm coming inside," said Naomi. "I'm busy," I bluntly said. "Busy?" said Naomi looking confused. "Yes," I bluntly said, "It's the opposite of being free." "Are you still in a mood because I didn't tell you I used to have a girlfriend?" asked a firm Naomi, "For God's sake will you grow up. What the Hell is your problem? It's me that should be in a mood with you after blabbing to Mike and telling him we haven't had sex." "Well, we haven't, have we?" I snapped, "And now I know why!" "What are you on about?" snapped Naomi. "Nothing, I don't want to talk about it," I bluntly said. "Talk about what!?" exclaimed Naomi, "Oh, do you know what Luke, I'm not in the mood for this. When you decide to stop playing childish games and behaving like a stroppy kid, and decide you want to talk to me like an adult, you'll know where to find me." Naomi then stormed off and I closed the door. I turned round where Mum and Auntie Meryl were looking at me appearing really confused. "Now what's going on?" Mum asked, "Why is there always a drama with you?" "It's nothing," I bluntly said. "Well, it doesn't sound like nothing," said Mum, "You want to be careful how you talk to that girl otherwise she'll dump you." "Well, maybe I'll dump her," I said. "Why would you do that?" asked Mum, "It's not like there's a queue of women lining up to date you is there?" "Unlike the queue of men lining up to get in your bedroom," Auntie Meryl bluntly said to Mum. "If you dump her, you won't get another girlfriend like that," said Mum, "No offence sausage but boys like you don't get girls like that. Boys like you get the girls like poo. Smelly and not nice to look at." "I'm going upstirs to spend some time with my son," I bluntly said. "Well, aren't you going to tell us what's going on?" asked Mum. "No!" I snapped, "Just leave me alone."

I stormed upstairs and spent the evening cuddling Leo. Mum tried to knock and my door and come into my room and talk to me but I told her to leave me alone. I can't believe Naomi would do this to me, and with Roz of all people! I feel like such a failure! I'm going to do something about this. I don't know what, but I know one thing; I'm not going to let Roz get away with this, and once I've thought about what I'm going to do and exactly what I'm going to say I am going to give both Naomi and Roz a firm piece of my mind!