In The Clear - Out Of The Woods Sequel - A Taylor Swift Fanfiction

Chapter 16: The Panic Attack

Author's note: Thank you for the panic attack idea <3 Madison returns to school in the next chapter (hopefully), please feel free to give some suggestions :) 

As Madison spent the rest of the evening in her room, the weight of her actions and the reality of her punishment began to fully sink in. The stern words from her parents echoed in her mind, each syllable like a hammer to her already fragile sense of self-worth. Alone in her room, the gravity of what she had done hit her with full force. She sat on the floor, her mind replaying the conversation over and over again.

Each word was a heavy blow to her conscience. Her parents' disappointment and the severity of her actions spiraled into a whirlwind of thoughts, leading her to an unthinkable conclusion – what if her punishment was more than just being grounded? What if Taylor and Travis, pushed to their limits, decided that the only solution was to put her up for adoption again? In Madison's mind, there's no way things could ever be okay again after what she's done.

This thought, irrational yet terrifyingly real in her distressed state, triggered an overwhelming sense of panic and abandonment. The room felt as if it were closing in on her, each breath becoming more difficult than the last. Her heart raced, pounding against her chest as if trying to escape the pain and the fear that consumed her.

Madison's sobs grew louder and more frantic, her body shaking with the intensity of her emotions. The tears streamed down her face, each one a testament to her guilt, her fear, and a deep-seated sense of remorse. The idea of losing the only real family she had ever known, the thought of being abandoned again, was too much to bear.

As her crying intensified, her breaths became short and labored. Her chest tightened, making it hard to breathe, to think, to exist. The walls of her room seemed to press in on her, and the air felt thick and heavy, suffocating her with her own fears.

In a moment of sheer panic and desperation, Madison's voice cracked as she screamed out, "Mom!" The sound was sharp, filled with fear and a plea for help. She gasped for air, struggling to breathe, her body shaking uncontrollably.

On the other side of the house, Taylor's heart skipped a beat when she heard Madison's scream. Dropping everything, she raced down the hallway, her mind filled with worry. Bursting into Madison's room, she found her daughter in a state of a panic attack, gasping for air and crying uncontrollably on the floor. Madison's eyes were wide and filled with terror.

"Maddie! Baby, look at me, breathe with me, please," Taylor urged, rushing to her daughter's side. She wrapped her arms around Madison, pulling her close, trying to provide a sense of security and calm.

Madison clung to Taylor, her breaths coming in short, rapid gasps. "I can't... I can't breathe..." she gasped, her body trembling.

Taylor held Madison tightly, her voice a steady and calming presence. "You can, baby, I'm here. Just focus on my voice. Breathe with me. In and out. Slowly. It's going to be okay."

Gradually, under Taylor's gentle guidance, Madison's breathing started to slow down, her sobs subsiding as she began to regain control. Taylor continued to hold her, whispering words of comfort, stroking her hair, and reassuring her that she was safe.

As the panic attack eventually faded, Madison lay in her mother's arms, emotionally and physically exhausted but feeling a sense of relief. Taylor gently rocked her back and forth, her presence a reminder of the unconditional love and support that remained, even during challenging times.

"You're okay now, honey," Taylor whispered as she rocked her daughter, "you're safe."

In the quiet aftermath of the panic attack, Madison lay in Taylor's arms, her breaths finally evening out. The room was filled with a sense of vulnerability and raw emotion. Madison, her eyes red and puffy from crying, looked up at Taylor, a deep sense of remorse visible on her face.

"Mom, I... I really am so sorry for spreading those rumors. I was so wrong, and I hurt everyone," Madison began, her voice quivering. "I just feel like... like I'm a bad person. And I'd understand if... if you wanted to revoke my adoption."

Taylor's heart clenched at Madison's words. She cupped Madison's face gently, ensuring their eyes met. "Baby, look at me," Taylor said firmly yet tenderly. "You made a very big mistake, and yes, it hurt us. But that doesn't make you a bad person. It makes you human."

Madison's eyes filled with fresh tears, her guilt and fear on full display. "But I betrayed our family. How can you still want me after what I did? You stopped being friends with people who betrayed you. I betrayed you."

Taylor pulled Madison closer, her embrace a fortress of comfort and love. "Because you are my daughter, Maddie. Nothing you do could ever change that. We all make mistakes, we learn, and we grow. That's what being a family is about – sticking together through the good and the bad. When I signed those adoption papers, I signed them for life. For good and bad. It never crossed my mind to give you up because of what you did."

Madison clung to Taylor, her body still trembling slightly. "I'm so scared, mom. I'm scared of messing up again, of losing you and dad."

"Madison, we love you, unconditionally," Taylor reassured her, her voice steady and full of warmth. "We're going to get through this together. Even if I'm ever mad at you or you're mad at me, you're not losing us, not now, not ever. Remember, messing up is a part of being human. Yes, you can be punished for it, but it doesn't mean that we don't love you any less."

"Even if I 'no body no crime' someone?" Madison dared to allow herself to smile while still sniffling.

Taylor chuckled, snuggling closer to her daughter, "I'll visit you in prison but I'll still love you. Don't test that though, please."

In that moment, Taylor's words and embrace slowly began to mend the cracks in Madison's heart, reminding her that despite her fears and faults, she was still loved and wanted. The bond they shared was not easily broken and this was the proof of that.