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"Alright, guys!" James, the senior software engineer at our firm clapped his hands together with a huge smile on his face. "The day we've been waiting for is finally here. Well done on completing the prototypes for Uhuru Airlines. This was the most complex work we've ever had to do, so pat yourselves on the back, sha."
The rest of the team seated in the office, myself included, clapped happily as the tech team and marketing representatives from Uhuru Airlines acknowledged our work with smiles and professional applause. It was another Friday at the office and we'd just spent a couple of hours adding finishing touches to our work to ensure that our client was happy with our use of the money they paid us to create several airline interfaces, web pages, databases, and an app for their customers to easily book and manage their flights without having to rely solely on a web browser. It had taken months for us to complete, and now that we were done, we could all breathe a little before the next project was placed in our laps.
"As you all know," James said once the Uhuru Airlines representatives had left, "the client has a few weeks to test everything out and give us feedback before we move into the final stage of this project. We'll also be quite busy with a new client once our work with Uhuru Airlines is done, so enjoy the next two to three weeks of holiday. I suggest you start now, 'cause me I'm out of here oh."
We laughed as James, flamboyant and fabulous, grabbed his handbag off his table and left the room with a flourish.
"Ehh, is it ironic that I'm only feeling a sense of freedom now that we're basically done with Uhuru Airlines?" Ashley laughed next to me as she turned off her computer and gathered her things.
"It is, but I feel you, sis." I said, standing with my own bag and making sure I wasn't leaving anything behind. "I've been waiting for this day since phase one of the project. I'm going home to sleep."
"Sleep?! Hakutakuwa na kulala huku! You can sleep when you're dead, rafiki yangu." Ashley shook her head, the glittery v-neck bodycon dress she had on glistening as she moved.
"Or I can die from not sleeping." I laughed, though inside I knew it wasn't a joke.
After nearly two weeks of relatively peaceful sleep, my nightmares had returned and were relentless for a few nights now, making it very hard for me to rest through the night. Dr. Baloyi and I were working through the details of each dream and something she kept telling me in nearly every session was that I had to forgive my past, something I was really trying to do. It was proving to be hard, but I was on a mission to experience some positive changes, so I'd keep going. I just wished the nightmares would come to an end.
The night before, I'd suffered through a memory of my mother laying her hands on me and calling me things no mother should call her child when I'd accidentally walked in on her sleeping with one of our neighbours in my grandmother's bedroom. I'd woken up shaking from anger, my back wet with sweat, my whole body in need of air as I stiffly took deep breaths. I'd give away everything I had to stop feeling that way in my bed at night.
