Halaw (Writing Exercises)

THE COURSE (10)

Three months. Three freaking months of irrational behavior. Another day of this fiasco and he'll hang himself just to get whatever this is that has been possessing him out of his system.

His thoughts went back to the early days of this semester. Back then he was so bored out of his mind he wished for something exciting to happen. The gods must have been listening. They gave him excitement. Too much, in fact, for him to bear.

'Be careful of what you wish for.' No words have ever been truer said than those.

There is something to be said about eating one's words. It hurts like a bitch. But, like a true masochist as he turned out to be, here he is again. For the nth time, he found himself parked outside the gate of the Alphabet Apartments, eyes glued to that particular door that has never opened even once in all the days he has been there. He is staring at it like a lunatic off his meds. He is starting to feel like one. And no amount of calling himself names that even a dog cannot stomach change the fact that, time and time again, he kept coming back to this same exact spot to stare at that freaking door. What he is expecting to happen, he doesn't have the foggiest idea.

Ty Ordoñez, what the hell are you doing? He has been asking that since he stopped the car. And he is sure to ask himself that same thing in the hours to come. Just like what happened in the previous nights, as soon as he parked the car, inside his mind, he would be screaming at himself to get out of there fast. But it was a useless endeavor. He wouldn't budge.

It seemed that he had developed another Ty inside of him, the idiotic Ty. The Ty who overtakes his body and refused to move until he is ready. That usually happens when the lights behind that door turns off. Unfortunately, the lights out time is usually an hour after midnight.

He glanced at his car clock. 9:35. Great! He is in for another 2 hours and 25 minutes of warming his seat with his butt. He slumped over his steering wheel in both defeat and frustration. He started to softly butt his head against it in hopes of waking himself out of this stupid antic.

"Delirium nervosa," Carly drunkenly announced one time. "That is your problem."

They were drinking at the other guy's apartment since his crib is a mess and has been a mess these past months. Who can blame him? Unlike Carly's, his place has been missing the female touch.

He remembered staring at Carly in confusion. He is no med student but he has never heard that term before.

Seeing his confused look, Carly further said, "Delirium nervosa. You know? Love?"

Carly almost earned another slug from him for that very helpful explanation. He swore at the guy instead. Carly just laughed it off. He has the sneaking suspicion that his bestfriend is immensely enjoying his current predicament.

Love. He scoffed that time and he is still scoffing now. What a bunch of crap! He – Ty Ordoñez – does not do love. It is just a word wimpy men bounce around to get laid. He is not a wimp and he does not need that tepid word to get laid. He can get laid anytime, anywhere, and with whomever he pleases without stooping so low as to use that L word.

'Anytime, anywhere and with whomever we please, huh? So, why is that we've been resorting to our adolescent years getting off in the shower with our lonesome?' Idiot Ty chimed in.

'Fuck off, asshole.' He hissed at himself.

'Great! I'm talking to myself. Now, I'm certifiable.' With a groan, Ty returned to softly tapping his forehead on the wheels.

Untimed minutes passed by. He got tired of slumping and leaned back into his seat. That is when he noticed that something is different with the apartment he has been spying on. For the first time ever since he started this gig, that girl's door opened. That girl. He refused to even speak her name out loud or even in his mind. He waited with abated breath for this unusual thing to unfold.