Woman Up (Port Ranch Book #2)

Chapter 15

BEV

Even if I wanted to ignore the five positive pregnancy tests that I’ve taken, there was no ignoring the white gummy bear-looking image that I’m staring at right now. I have been so stressed out with my broken heart and still trying to work on planning Brielle’s wedding, that for some reason I hadn’t even realized that I missed my period.

It wasn’t until Brielle happened to mention the same sensitivity to smells that I was having that I quickly tried to think in my head when the last time I had my period was. Standing there with my mom, Brielle, and Mitch staring at me, I realized that I hadn’t had one since I’d been back home and I simply could not remember.

Charlie and I used condoms, but we weren’t great at remembering them. I was also on birth control. I’m a little angry at myself because I SHOULD have made an appointment with the doctor a month ago to be tested after finding out he was sleeping around, but there was just so much and I didn’t think about it. Now I’m staring at the gummy bear that is my baby, squeezing my mom’s hand for dear life.

My mom reaches over and wipes away the tears that are falling down my cheek. I’m sure the doctor thinks they are happy tears and maybe there is a bit of me that is already in love with the being growing inside of me, but they’re mostly sad tears.

“It looks like you’re about 9 weeks pregnant, Miss Port,” the doctor verified.

“Nine weeks? So I’m just a week behind Brielle.”

“That’s kind of fun, the two of you will go through this experience together.” My mom gave me a gentle smile and I returned the grin. I know what she’s trying to do. She’s trying to make me excited about this, even though deep down inside I’m feeling broken and confused. I feel like Mother Nature is trying to play some huge joke on me because just the other week I was feeling a bit of jealousy that Brielle was getting the life I wanted.

Now I’m here, and it isn’t that I don’t want to be a mom, boy do I. When I imagined it though, I was married to Charlie and we were planning our family together. I never thought it would be after finding out about the cheating, breaking off the engagement, and feeling alone. How am I going to do this?

The doctor pressed a few buttons and then a sound of rushing air filled the room, followed soon after by a racing heartbeat. For a moment I thought it may have been mine, until I realized my mom’s face was glowing and I realized it was my baby’s heartbeat.

“That’s my baby?” I choked back the tears.

“Yes, it is, super-strong heartbeat and everything.”

“That’s good.”

“Very good.” He pulls the ultrasound wand out of me and pulls the sheet back over my legs. My mom helps me sit up and the doctor hands me some black and white prints of the ultrasound. I  rub my thumb over the image, definitely in awe that a real-life baby was growing inside of me.

“Everything looks really great, Miss Port. Remember the list of foods to avoid that I gave you and don’t forget to take your prenatal vitamin.”

“I won’t forget, thank you.”

“I will see you in about four weeks for your next check-up, they’ll schedule that up front.” He shakes my hand and leaves the room. My mom also gives me some privacy to get cleaned up and dressed. The entire time I can’t stop looking at the picture of my baby.

After checking out, my mom and I get back into her car and start the drive home. I lay my head against the headrest, looking out the window as she drives.

“Do you want to stop anywhere for lunch?” She asks.

“No, I’m not really hungry.”

“What did you eat for breakfast? I know it is hard, but you need to make sure you’re getting your calorie count in, especially if you’re feeling any morning sickness like your sister.”

“No, I’ve been fine,” I answer, still staring out the window.

“Bev, baby?” My mom reaches over and places her hand on my thigh and gives me a gentle squeeze. “Baby, I know this is hard for you. I promise that your dad and I will be there for you every step of the way. You know your sisters will also. We love you, we will always be there.”

“I know, Mom,” I sigh. There was no doubt that they’d all have my back. It didn’t change that this wasn’t how I wanted becoming a mom to happen.

“Have you thought about how you’re going to tell, Charlie?”

I feel a few stray tears fall down my cheeks once again. I try to wipe them away, but more follow. Before I know it I’m crying once more. “I don’t know what to tell him, Mom. We always talked about having a family. I spent so many years wanting to have his babies and now I’m pregnant with his baby and it almost makes the heartbreak even worse.”

“I cannot even begin to imagine what you’re going through. As much as I want to hate the guy, he is going to be a father and he has every right to know.”

“I know he does. I’ll tell him, I just don’t know when. What if he wants me to move back to Chicago?”

“Just because you are having his baby doesn’t mean you have to uproot your life, sweetheart. It also doesn’t mean the two of you need to be together. I don’t have all the answers for you, but I’ll try to help you navigate through this the best that I can.”

“Do you think Brielle will ever forgive me?”

“What do you need forgiveness for? You didn’t do anything wrong.”

“I’m stealing her baby and her wedding thunder.”

“Beverly…” My mom hardly uses my full name unless I’m in trouble. I looked over at her and she had that stern, but friendly, look on her face that told me she was about to drop some real truth bombs on me.

“Your sister is going to be excited to be an aunt again. Your sister is going to love sharing the experience of pregnancy and raising a child with you. I know this was not the how and when you had planned, but that does not change the end game in this.”

“And as far as her wedding,” Mom continues, “you’re still doing just as much work on it. You took off one little morning so you could go to the doctor. Now we’re heading back home and after I force you to sit down and each lunch, you’ll be right back to the wedding arrangements. In fact, I’m pretty certain my biggest job this entire weekend is to make sure that both you and Brielle eat plenty for your babies.”

This weekend was Brielle’s wedding, starting with the rehearsal dinner tomorrow night. We were expecting close to 200 guests for the main event on Saturday, something that I had been working on planning since January. Everything was going perfectly so far, the added bonus was Brielle being my sister, and getting to add those personal touches I knew would mean so much to her.

“I want to let her have this weekend before we tell people outside the family.” If I could go back in time, I’d keep this news to myself until after the wedding, but Brielle figured it out right away when she saw the panic on my face. There was no way I could keep it from my other sisters or Dad, so we told them a couple of days later.

“We can do that for sure. This is all up to you. Your dad and I and your sisters will follow your lead.”

“What if I can’t do this alone, Mom? This kid might end up so messed up.”

“That isn’t true at all, Bev. I don’t care how many times I need to tell you this, but you have your dad and I. You have Brielle, Brooke, and Britt. Mitch is going to help you as much as he can in between his own new-dad panic. Hell, I’m sure once Granger finds out he’ll be right beside you every step of the way.”

I sigh, “You’re probably right.”

“I know I’m right. Everything will work out, my dear. We’re a family, we’ve got your back.”

I turn back to look out the window and watch the fields go by. I knew my mom was right. I felt alone, but I was never really alone. I can’t predict how Charlie is going to take the news, but I can predict how my family will react. We’ll get through this like we get through everything else, together. Hopefully, all that love will keep this kid from being messed up.