Supernatural (Reader Insert One-shots)

It's Okay Not To Be Okay (Castiel x depressed!Reader)

"I don't understand. What is this "depression" thing you're talking about?" asked Castiel and cocked his head to one side. "You say it's hurting you. How do we get rid of it?"

You blinked away the tears forming in your eyes and took a deep breath. You almost regretted letting the angel know that you had been suffering from depression for almost a year now. "That's the thing about depression, Cas. You can't get rid of it just like that. There's no cure."

"There has to be something."

You smiled sadly at Cas and shook your head. "Not really."

Your life as a hunter had never been easy. You had been alone for years before joining the Winchesters. It hadn't made your life any easier, but meeting Cas was probably the best thing that had ever happened to you. By then, you were pretty depressed, so it was no wonder why the angel in that adorable trench coat was like a beacon in your dark life. Looking back on it, you wish you had felt better then, because maybe you would have been able to understand your feelings towards him. You were so confused - was he only your savior or maybe something much more..? However, your head was a real mess those days and you had more pressing matters - like a nasty vengeful spirit or a furious werewolf - so you never got to talk to Cas. But now he was here and you had finally worked up your courage to talk to him about your 'problem'.

"Why not?"

"Because it's inside of my head. It's not a monster you can just kill off and be done with it." You ran your fingers through your matted hair.

"Oh." Cas plopped down next to you on the bed and scrunched his face up in concentration. "So you're not okay?"

"No.."

Cas cleared his throat and got lost in his own thoughts. Then suddenly, his face lit up. You looked at him curiously. "What is it?"

He turned to you with an enthusiastic smile and started sputtering. "(Y/n), I don't know much about human emotions. And I definitely don't understand any of them. But there's one thing I know for sure: it's okay not to be okay." Cas looked into your eyes expectantly.

You could no longer hold your tears back. You had been struggling with feeling like an outsider for so long and then this angel came and told you it was fine. That you were fine, absolutely normal. Cas looked at you awkwardly and hugged you. "I-is this awkward?"

You hugged him back and buried your face into his chest.

"(Y/n)..? A-are you okay..?"

"Just hold me, Cas."