Learn To Trust (Sequel to Learn To Love)

Chapter 12

I squeeze the hand that's not holding the poem into a tight fist. How could I cause him so much pain? How could I break him like this? How could I do this to Jake? The Jake who loved me and cared for me. The things he did that I couldn't return. I fold the paper, deciding to keep it. Jake would never know. I quickly slip it into a pocket to keep it safe from the wet tears falling from my eyes. I hear something shift behind me. I whip my head around just to see a flash of blue, white and golden hair. Jake.

"J-Jake?" I whisper. Nothing responds. I stand up and walk around the corner of the bookshelf that was behind the desk. Another flash of golden hair appears before he disappears out of my sight again. I frown and run, chasing the repeatedly disappearing boy. I sigh after a couple of minutes and slide down to sit against a bookshelf. A shadow appears, looming over me.

"Carlie." He murmurs huskily, voice smooth and sweet like honey, sending tingles running up my spine.

"I'm sorry." I whisper, not meeting his intense gaze, a gaze that makes my face heat up.

"So am I. But I have to do this." He says, I hear the sadness in his voice but it soon turns cold.

"I am very sorry, Lady Carlie Wanger, you are no longer participating in Prince Jake's selection. You are free to give all your love to Prince Josh." My heart plummets to the ground and shatters into a million pieces.

"W-what? N-no... P-please Jake, n-no. I-I c-can't. P-please. I n-need y-you." I beg, tears start to flow from my eyes once again.

"I'm sorry." His voice changes from cold to haughty. He's gone back to the Jake from the beginning of the selection. Cold, lonely, heartbroken.

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"Carlie?" A soft voice calls, a warm smile spreads across my lips.

"Right here." I reply. Jake's face comes into view and he smiles. He runs up to me, happiness radiating off of him and picks me up, twirling me around. My brown hair shines in the sunlight and I laugh out loud. But suddenly, everything shimmers and I gasp. His arms let go, I fall to the floor and Jake wavers.

"You left me, Carlie." His mesmerizing voice whispers before he completely disappears.

I sit up, clutching at my sheets. A bead of sweat trickles down from my temple to my chin. Tears streak my cheeks. I fall back onto my soft pillow that is now wet from my tears. Why? Why did I do this to myself? How could I? I close my eyes and try to escape these thoughts that somehow make me shiver.

I'm running around during a rebel attack, trying desperately to find the safe room.

"Carlie! Carlie! Help me!" His voice screeches, pain and fear lacing the tone.

"I'm coming! I'm coming! Hang on!" I call out frantically. I twist and turn through the maze of hallways when I finally find him. A rebel shoots him straight in the chest and he collapsed onto the ground. I shriek and run forward as the rebel runs away. I drop to my knees, sobbing uncontrollably.

"Jake, Jake, please stay with me." I whisper, trying to cover up the wound.

"Carlie..." He coughs and blood trickles down his chin.

"You.. Left... Me..." His heart stops beating my his eyes close. Forever.

"No! Jake! No! Please, no. Stay with me! I need you!" I scream, heartbroken. My eyes are letting down a waterfall of tears and I can't help it. Jake is gone. He's gone.

I wake up again, screaming and weeping.

"Jake." I whisper to myself, burying my face into my hands, sobbing silently. I curl up into a ball, falling asleep to the sound of my own midnight cries.

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It's morning. I don't feel like getting up, don't feel like eating, don't feel like talking. I lay there in silence for hours, pondering on what I am supposed to do when I leave. I don't think I could feel for Josh in the way I feel for Jake. Then I hear a click and a small creak when the door opens.

"Carlie?" The low voice jolts me out of my daydreams.

"Who is it?" I ask dully, already knowing.

"Josh." He says quietly. I sigh and turn onto my side, facing him.

"What is it?" I ask tiredly, it's funny how I had well over 11 hours of sleep yet I still feel sluggish and exhausted.

"I was wondering maybe you weren't feeling well because you didn't come to breakfast or lunch. I furrow my eyebrows confusedly. I'd missed lunch?

"Huh. Well I'm okay." I shrug and turn to lie on my back again, counting the little lilac coloured dots that pattern the ceiling.

"Carlie? Look at me, please." He pleads sweetly, and he sounds so concerned and caring and upset that I do. Just like that, he grabs my arm, pulls me to his chest and kisses me. I sit there, frozen, but something, something I can't just describe, something that I never knew, that I don't know of, tugs me in and I return the kiss.

It's gentle, soft, sweet and loving. He wraps his arms around me and pulls me closer. This kiss is pleasant, comforting until...

I feel a crack and splinter deep within myself. My heart jerks around crazily, and a fire burns inside. I kiss him in a disoriented vehement passion and he returns it tenfold. The flaming passion burns on, sizzling, sending a warm tingle through me, which soars even further as he deepens the kiss. It's consuming and powerful. It continues, long, deep and loving.

He breaks it, pulling away, looking dazed. I gasp internally, I pushed him and rushed him, I took it too far, I break myself away from his grasp, backing up to the edge of the bed. He looks at me, eyes pained.

"Does your heart not beat for me at all, Carlie?" He asks sorrowfully. I look at him in surprise. He liked the kiss? I take a deep breath,

"Of course it does, Josh. I love you."

I said it. 'I love you.'

A/N: I am so sorry guys! It took so long to update, I've been busy and had sort of writers block! But here it is, a #jolie moment. I don't know if anyone ships them but... Anyways, I'm working on The Second Choice, it'll be up soon, hopefully.

Also, I want to thank all my loyal readers, comment your favourite chapter so far in Learn to Trust and I'll shout you all out next chapter!!!!!!!

Stay Fabulous,

Val.