Trouble in Paradise

Chapter XVII - Peter

"Peter Alexander D'Orio Montecarlo, I'm going to kill you! Come out wherever you are!"

I should've known this would come but I still hoped for him to be calmed by the time he got home.

I act surprised by his outburst. "What did I do?"

"What did I–?" He laughs without any humor, "What do you think you fucking did? What was that bit Marco pulled tonight? What the hell did you do?"

"I didn't do anything," I lie.

"Oh cut the crap. What the hell was that? And don't you dare lie because I swear to Jesus Christ I'll dismember you."

Okay, so he's not that happy with what I did. Maybe I should tell the truth.

"I just wanted you home."

Luke doesn't answer and instead sighs getting his fingers through his hair, making him look sexier than ever if I dare to say. After a minute or so of him looking down and me standing there like an idiot, Luke finally speaks.

"Why are you doing this? You were the one who wanted to separate. Hell, you didn't even ask to separate, you went straight for divorce. Do you–do you not notice how your actions hurt me?"

Of course, I notice. Do I miss every social clue that exists? Sure. Still, it doesn't mean I don't know the pain I caused him.

Luke walks closer to me sitting on a bench near the front door. I walk closer putting my hand on his shoulder.

"Baby," he flinches. Because of my touch or because of the endearment, I truly don't know. What I do know is that I feel a tight grip on my chest that knocks my breath away. I did some damage and I don't know how to fix this.

I sit next to Luke and throw my arm over his shoulder and he doesn't flinch this time which tells me it was me calling him 'baby' that triggered him.

"I'm sorry," I finally say what I should've said long ago. "I'm so sorry, Luke. I never meant for things to happen like this. I would never hurt you on purpose."

Luke shrugs and I cup his face to turn it my way so he can see me when I talk. "I was selfish, an idiot. If I could do things again I... I would never hurt you on purpose, my love."

Yes, he's my love. The further away we get from each other the bigger the worry in my head that I'll never get him back.

When I started going out with Gabe I was hopeful, though I didn't know what I hoped for. Love, maybe? I wanted a love story for the ages. I wanted to feel what it felt like to slowly fall in love because with Luke it was immediate love.

I've always loved Luke and he's always loved me so I never had to work for it. Never had to pursue him and the thought of the chase excited me, but it was all a tale. Reality hit me when I found Luke at the club all over some guy, but seeing him going out with that guy and even worse, putting more effort into his date than he even did for me, it just wrecked my heart.

"Luke?" I ask after waiting for his answer and not getting any. "Luke, look at me, please."

He looks at me and all I see is disappointment. It would hurt less if it was anger instead.

"Do you forgive me?"

He sighs and doesn't answer. I move closer, our breaths warm on each other's faces.

"Do you forgive me?"

I ask again but get no answer. Just a deeper sigh with a different feeling. He's nervous.

"Do you..." I dare to caress his face and this time, for a brief moment, I press my lips against his and finish, "...forgive me?"

"Peter, you're not playing fair here."

"Fairness has no place when it comes to getting you back."

Luke startles when I say that and for a second I think I ruined it all and that I will push him away even more but Luke doesn't do that. He comes back close to where our mouths almost meet. Taking advantage of the short gap between us I kiss his lips.

I know Luke and I know I'm overwhelming him, so much to my pain, I pull back and throw my arm over his shoulders once again, this time pulling him closer to me.

"Remember the night of Marco and Beth's engagement party?" Luke chuckles and I exhale. He nods and I keep going. "You were so embarrassed," I'm the one to chuckle this time. "I couldn't believe we were caught on tape."

"Nooo, why? Why did you remind me of that? I'll never be able to look at your cousin the same."

He feels lighter somehow, like the memory brings him calm even if he's laughing a little.

Marco's engagement party is one of the most embarrassing memories we have. The place was packed and we were bored and horny. Bad combination for two men who were just learning to devour each other while making love. I can almost feel the need and hunger I felt back then.

"We were so desperate that night. You wanted me so badly." I feel Luke tensing but I'm hopeful that reminding him what we've always had will help him forgive me. "You were begging me to take you in that closet and I was desperate to love every part of you. Who could have known they had a camera where they store brooms and mops? God Luke, I loved you so much... still do."

It's my last sentence that does it and I regret saying it immediately, yet too late.

"Peter I... I think it's better if I go to my room."

I hate it. I hate that he wants to get away from me. But for once I try to be selfless and I let him go.

We walk side by side and up the stairs, not a word spoken. For some reason, I remember Luke's laugh, and my eyes water because I fucked up, and is possible I can't fix this.

The door closest to the stairs is Luke's room so he stops there, and I stop next to him. We both look down to the floor and neither says a word. For an eternity we stay there, silent. Or maybe it was a minute but it didn't feel like such.

I turn around to walk away defeated.

I'm just five steps in when I hear my husband's soft voice calling my name.

"Peter, wait." I turn back around to face him and we stare at each other. The time stands still and shortly after it fasts forward.

Before I get a chance to react Luke's lips are on mine and I lose the bit of composure I had.