Hers Only (Ongoing)

𝐓𝐨𝐨 𝐐𝐮𝐢𝐞𝐭

(Guys I have a special attachment to this song and suggest you listen to the whole thing if you wanna have your life changed 😋💔)
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Am I making you feel,
am I making your feel sick?

___________________________

Davina Hernandez

It's too quiet right now for me to sleep.

My thoughts scream at each other and minute by minute they get louder and louder.

The time must be around 3 or 4 am and I keep tossing and turning around in my sheets restlessly.

I want to cry.

No, I need to cry right now.

Because all of a sudden I'm so fucking insecure about my body, my hair, my skin, my life and everything.

I want to scratch my whole face off and plaster a new one on.

One that's perfect and made without any blemishes.

Where my skin shines, my eyes pop, my lips look more puckered and there's no unnecessary shit on me.

It's one of those nights where I feel like pitching myself off of a bridge and just not.. existing anymore.

It's that night where I imagine everything I hate about myself and compare it all with someone who looks better.

I fucking hate myself and fucking hate everything about me.

I'm done.

Deciding I've had enough I push the covers off of me and get up to go slip into a hoodie so I can go out.

I grab the first one I see which is swung over my chair, and pull it over my head hastily as it wipes away my tears in the process.

Opening the door quietly, I walk slowly down the stairs and slip on a pair of crocs before leaving the house.

I don't know where I'm going but I just know I'm going to walk away the pain.

The rain slaps against the top of my umbrella as I stroll through the stone paved sidewalks not focusing on anything but the sounds of the rain.

I look down to see that I'm wearing a black hoodie that reaches my upper thighs with the word divine written on the centre.