The Stream (sequel to The Blackout)

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I couldn't stop the shaking, even though I thought I had calmed down a little. The flight wasn't helping either. It's not the part about being in the air that bothers me, it's the taking off and landing. Tom has done this many times before - flying to and from America, so he held my shaky body as we took off from the ground. He will probably do the same when we land in LA. Even though it has been about half a day, I miss the twins and the others already. Tom did promise that I can Skype the guys later, so I most likely will.

Right now though, Tom was sleeping against my shoulder and I was wide awake listening to music on my phone curled up on my seat staring at the seat in front of me. All I was thinking about was what happened this morning and the way that Tom reacted to it. It was like he knew what he was doing; he was calm and kept himself together where on the inside he could've been panicking. I know that if it were me, then I would've been panicking. I panic when it comes to any of my friends not being their usual selves.

I let out a sigh as the song changed from Ain't It Fun by Paramore to Things We Lost In The Fire by Bastille. As if on cue the Syndicate stirred in his sleep but didn't move from my shoulder. He let out a slight yawn, which I found adorable, and smiled once his eyes landed on mine. Those eyes were so mesmerising.

He sat up a little more and pressed his lips to my own. I sighed into his lips as they moves perfectly together. Now I was a little more calm than before and it was all because of Syndicate. What he did for me this morning was really sweet, it was like he knew exactly what to do. It was unreal to think that someone, who I have been keeping some secrets from, is reading me slowly like an open book. Unless, he really knew what he was doing.

"Thank you", I said when he pulled away and wrapped his arms around me.

He frowned looking a little confused; it actually made me laugh a little, but he was confused I think. "For what?", he questioned.

"Um, for like calming me earlier and stuff", I replied awkwardly.

Tom hummed in response and began pressing his lips to my jaw line, "That's okay, you know I'll here forever", he whispered kissing my cheek again.

I felt my eyes water a little. Tom will be here for me forever and that was a promise he just made. It was a promise that I wish he could keep, but what if he doesn't? I don't want to lose him. Tom is someone I need and I don't want to lose whatever we have together. What would happen if I did lose him? Yeah, I have the guys back home, but I will only get reminded of what happened and what I did to them. It wasn't their fault it was mine. No matter how much someone says it wasn't my fault, I don't believe them as it was my fault.

Tom must've noticed the tears escape my eyes as he began shushing me and wiping a few of the tears off of my cheeks. He held me close in his arms and began to repeat words I have heard all too many times before. He didn't repeat them too often, though so he came up with his own words and made sure I was in his arms for the rest of the flight. I really needed this, so he let me go off into my own world by putting both my ear buds back in. 'Dial Tones' , by As It Is was his song of choice for me to listen to first. I smiled resting my head on his shoulders again staring out of the window.

For the rest of the flight, I watched the peachy colored clouds go by the window. I imagined it to be mountains or hills of snow and I could see a little village in the snow which I live in. The hills of snow surrounded the village and people were sledging on them having fun, but I saw myself sat by a tree with him there. It was Tyler and it was the day that he told me he was leaving. I was begging him to not listen to Caitlin, but he wouldn't listen. She had told him that I would hurt him like I hurt the twins, but I kept telling him that I would never do that.