YES DADDY | tronnor

Chapter 7✍

Troye ♕

I wake up on top of Connor's chest, while he has his arm around me. He was still sound asleep, so I decided to cherish this moment while it lasted, closing my eyes again. Unfortunately, Connor's a light sleeper apparently, and woke up when I moved my head slightly on him. I just pretend to sleep, still not wanting to get up and face the horror of mornings. His arm left my body and he sat up, placing my head on his lap softly.

"You're so amazing Troye. I just wish you would accept that yourself," Connor whispered as he stroked the hair away from my eyes. A pang of guilt and self-hatred hit my heart. He doesn't deserve to have to worry about me. He doesn't deserve to care about a worthless and dishonest whore.

"You're beautiful, in the inside and out," Connor chuckled, "why don't you let me in, Troye, why? I can help you... And you might be able to help me..."

Connor still thinks I'm asleep, until tears run down my cheeks and I shiver, causing him to look down at me. I squeeze my eyes shut, attempting to keep my silent cries in, but causing tears to escape. Connor turns my cheek so I'm facing him, and he looks like his mother just died.

"Troye...please, just let me in...." He pleads, "it breaks me to see you like this."
I can't stand to see Connor like this, he deserves to know before he even thinks about wanting to be in a relationship with me. I take in a deep breath, trying to steady my voice and get up off his lap, so I'm facing him. Not being able to look Connor straight in the eye because of shame, I trail my eyes down to my thumbs, which are involuntarily fumbling with each other.

"Exactly one year ago yesterday, my boyfriend, Chase, broke up with me..."
Connor visibly heats up in anger, but I put my hand up, to stop him from speaking, and I continue, "...but he was right to."

Connor's eyebrows scrunch up and confusion overtakes his face: "How?"

"Chase...man, he was perfect..." I smiled, "and he knew how to cheer me up. He would always know what to say, and I genuinely thought that we would end up together, forever." Tears run down my cheeks, and I hastily wiped them off with the sleeve of my sweater. "He would always dry my eyes, bringing color to my skies. But I didn't have a job. And I knew that if I didn't get money soon, I would need to move back to Australia, and leave Chase. I couldn't even fathom living without him for a day, so I-I...." I get choked up and put my face in my hands, "I'm sorry...I-oh my god, get it together, Troye! I turned to the easiest way to make money in LA..."

Connor spoke up in a whisper, "Prostitution?"

I nodded, ashamed. Then, I cried hysterically, "Why in the bloody hell would I think that cheating on my boyfriend for money would keep me close to him! Why, Connor? Why did I make such a stupid mistake when I was clouded by the thought of me having to leave him, when in the end, he left me? If I'm so smart, then why was I so dumb when it came to love?!?"

Connor ♛

At this point, Troye was rocking back and forth slowly, sobbing, with his knees up to his forehead, and hands grabbing at his hair painfully. And for the first time in a long time, I didn't know what to say. He was torn apart. "Do you still love him?" I ask dreadingly.

Troye gathers his breath and says, "No. I don't, but he was my first love. And I won't get over this because I'm mostly frustrated with myself for being so dumb when it comes to love. Now, I-I have this thought in my head that if I do find someone, I'm probably gonna screw their life, and my life over again. And no one deserves that, especially not from a used and worthless whore like me."

He needs to stop calling himself worthless and used and stupid and all the other slurs. "Troye, look at me. You are not worthless or dumb. People make mistakes, especially when it comes to love. But, but you need to forgive yourself, and try to make yourself happy by being open-minded. And that's all I ask of you. Give love a chance. Give us a chance."

And for the first time in hours, Troye smiles. He genuinely smiles. "Thanks Connor. You-you polarized my situation for me. Before, I just blamed it on myself. But the first step for me is learnings to love myself and accept my mistakes. And you made me realize it."

I smile and ask somewhat nervously, "So...Troye Sivan, will you be my boyfriend?"

He giggles, "After all of that, you think I would say no? Yes! I haven't ever told anybody the story of Chase, not even my best friend, Tyler."

My heart stops at the name, Tyler. Bringing back so many memories, I'd like to have burned away from my brain. Surely it's not the same person we're both taking about, but the name still hurts to hear. I realize that if he's sharing his past, then I will also have to.

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I KNOW THIS IS A SHORT CHAPTER, IM SORRY BUT I JUST NEEDED TO CRAM SOME BACKGROUND INFO ABOUT THE CHARACTERS IN! <3