Nerdy Love

Chapter 10

Chapter 10

Through it all I still loved him. He fucked up. He hurt me. He broke me. Would I change meeting him? Would I change falling for him? Would I change any of our time together all the happy moments? No I wouldn't. Nothing.

I rushed to the door flung it open and ran down the stairs and then across the sidewalk calling his name. "Nathan wait!" He turned around and I flung into him kissing him with just desperation because I knew I couldn't quit him. I didn't want to know what it was like to not have him anymore. So far it's been hell and I hated it. His hands were holding my face delicately like he might break me but I was crushing myself to him. I hated it that I needed him so much.

I broke the kiss. He stopped to catch his breath. "Whoa! Where did that come from?"

"I just thought even though I hate you for what you did I can't quit you. I'd never change any moment we spent together. All the laughs, all the kisses, all the late night talks. I need you. I hate that I need you and I don't really trust you but that's something you will have to earn back. I just know I love you. I'm hopelessly in love with a nerd. My nerd."

He smiled a bit. "I know you don't trust me and I will earn it all back. I'd never change any of the good moments either. I think I'm more hopelessly in love with you than you are with me. This last month was hell for me too. You are my air Soph...you really are."

With that he kissed me gently like I was actually his air and he was trying to savor every ounce. It was nice.

We walked back into my apartment and we cuddled and kissed. I missed his lips so much. To not have them for a month was like eating something you just weren't in the mood for. You got full but not fulfilled.

He snuggled into the crook of my neck and inhaled. "Soph, I missed your smell. You smell like flowers, sunshine, and sex." He ran his nose from my chin to my collar bone.

"Is that good?" I giggle.

"Very good. Sophie, I want you."

"Well handsome man what do you want to learn tonight?"

"I want to make love to you."

I stopped. "Nathan, are you sure? I mean I just don't want you to do it just because you want to make it up to me."

"I am."

I wasn't so sure this time. I looked at him and he could tell I was thinking.

"Sophie, what is it?"

"I just don't know if it's the right time. I know you say you're ready but we just got back together and I love you but I still don't quite trust you enough to go there. I think we should wait. Not just for you or me but for us."

He looked at me. "Okay baby. I understand. I've waited all my whole life what's a bit longer going to change. Plus you're right, I do need you to trust me before that happens." He kissed my cheek. "We should probably not do anything sexual for a bit too right?"

"Yes, as much as I want to I know it's just not the right time."

He held me for a while and we ended up falling asleep after talking.

The next morning I woke up and Nathan was still sleeping and his hand was holding mine. I smiled. He still had so much to prove to me that he wouldn't hurt me and fuck up again but I was willing to let him try.

His eyes flickered when I moved my hand then they opened. "Mornin gorgeous!" He smiled.

"Morning." I placed a kiss on his cheek. "We should get up and go to school."

We showered and Nathan left before I did to change into new clothes and then met me at my locker in school.

"Hey babe." Nathan pops up and hands me a bouquet of lilies. "For you."

I take them and smile. "Thank you Nathan! I love them!"

"You're welcome, beautiful. Just a tiny step in making up to you. Plus I remembered they are your favorite." He smirked.

I smile and blush a bit. Oh gosh where did that come from? He just made me blush. That rarely happens.

Before I could say anything else Jack comes up. "Whoa! What the fuck dude. Get the fuck away from her."

"Jack hey it's okay. We are okay. We are trying again."

He looked at me like I was crazy. "Are you high? After what he did to you. Sophie, he hurt you. I saw the light leave your eyes and I never want to see it happen again. I spent every night with you comforting you when you bawled your eyes out and now that you're relatively okay you're letting his cheating ass come back."

I looked down.

"Jack, look I'm sorry I put her and you through any of that and I told her that I was going and she chose to come to me. If she never wanted me again I'd understand but I'm not going to leave her unless she says otherwise. I promise I will never hurt her again. I am trying to make it right."

Jack huffed. "Yeah whatever. I'll believe it when I see it. Sophie, I'm going to class text me later."

I said bye and me and Nathan walked to my first class. "Soph, are you sure you want to try this again? I won't blame you if you don't."

I grimaced at him. "Yes I'm sure. I came after you Nathan."

I grab his hand. "I love you. "

He smiles. "I love you too my queen." He kissed my cheek and we parted having to resume our day.

During Math we sat together and held hands the whole time. It was nice to just sit there with him. There was sexual tension as always but we said we'd pace ourselves. It was not without struggle though. He was looking good in some new suspenders he got and his glasses were new.

Later that night after we both got off of work Nathan came over with some food. Nathan worked for the school. He worked on the computers and the systems.

We ate and watched a movie and snuggled but we decided he wasn't going to stay so he went back to his dorm but he kissed me goodnight and it was the best of course it always was with him.