After

Chapter 31.

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"He's not so bad, I guess," Noah says and I laugh nervously. "What?" He raises his eyebrow at me.

"Nothing, I am just surprised that you said that" I say and lay back into his chest. The electricity that filled the room moments ago has dissolved.

"I'm not saying I would want to hang out with the guy but he was friendly enough"

"Hardin is nothing close to friendly" I say and he chuckles and wraps his arm around me. If he only knew the things that happened between Hardin and I, the way we kissed, the way I moaned his name while he.. god Tessa just stop. I lean my head up and kiss Noah's jaw, making him smile. I want Noah to make me feel the way Hardin does. I sit up and turn to face him. I take his face between my hands and press my lips against his. His mouth opens and he kisses me back. His lips are soft, just like his kiss. I need the fire, I need the passion. I wrap my hands around his neck and pull myself onto his lap,

"Whoa, Tessa what are you doing?" He asks and tries to push me off gently.

"What? Nothing, I just.. I want to make out I guess" I say and look down. I am usually not embarrassed in front of Noah but this isn't something we usually talk about.

"Okay.?" He says and I kiss him again. I feel the warmth from him but not the fire. I start to rock my hips ,hoping to light the fire. His hands go down to  my waist but he pushes them against me, stopping my movements. I know we agreed to wait until marriage but I am just kissing him. I grab his hands and pull them away and continue to rock against him. No matter how many times I try to kiss him harder, his mouth stays soft and timid. I can feel him getting turned on but he doesn't act on it.

I know I am doing this for all the wrong reasons but I don't care at the moment, I just need to know that Noah can do to me what Hardin does. It isn't actually Hardin that I want it's the feeling.. isn't it?

I stop kissing Noah and slide off his lap.

"That was nice Tessa" He smiles and I give him one back. It was "nice". He is so careful, too careful, but I love him. I press play on the movie and within minutes I feel myself drifting off.

"I should go" Hardin says. His green eyes looking down at me.

"Go where?" I don't want him to go.

"I am going to stay at a hotel close by, I will be back in the morning" He says and his face fades into Noah's. I jolt up and wipe my eyes, it is Noah. It was never Hardin.

"You're obviously really sleepy, and I can't stay the night here" he smiles and brushes my cheek. I want him to stay but I am afraid of what I will see or say in my sleepy state. I know Noah wouldn't think it was decent to stay in my room anyway. Hardin and Noah are polar opposites. In every way

"Okay, thank you again for coming" I mumble and he kisses me lightly on the cheek before sliding out from under me.

"I love you" he says and I nod and bury my head back into my pillow.

The next morning I wake up to Noah calling. He tells me he is on his way from his hotel so I roll out of bed and rush to the showers. I had planned on taking a short shower but the water feels so good against my tense muscles. What should Noah and I do today? There isn't much to do around here unless we go into town, maybe I should text Landon and ask what there is to do around here besides party. He seems to be my only friend who would know.

I decided to wear my gray pleated skirt and a plain blue shirt. I ignore Hardin's voice in the back of my head telling me that my skirt is ugly. Noah is in the hall waiting by my door as I return with the towel still in my hair.

"You look lovely" he smiles and puts his hand over mine as I open the door.

"I just need to do my hair and put a little makeup on" I tell him and grab Steph's makeup bag. I am glad she didn't take it with her, I will need to get some of my own now that I know I like the way it looks.

He sits patiently on my bed as I dry my hair and curl the ends. I stop and give him a kiss on the cheek before I apply my makeup. "What do you want to do today?" I finish with mascara and fluff my hair.

"College really suits you Tessa, you have never looked better" Noah compliments me. "I don't know, maybe we can go to a park or something, then dinner?" he says and I look at the clock. How is it already 1pm? I text Steph and tell her I will be out most of the day and she responds saying she will be gone until tomorrow. I have come to notice that she basically lives at Hardin's fraternity house on the weekends.

We drive around to find a park which only takes a little while. "When are you going to start looking for a car?" He asks while he parks the car. The park we found is small and quiet.

"I think this week actually. I am going to apply for jobs this week too." I don't mention the internship at Vance Publishing that Hardin dangled in front of me.

"That is great news, let me know if you need anything" he offers and I nod. We walk around the park and sit at a picnic table. He talks most of the time and I nod along. I find myself dazing in and out of the conversation but he doesn't seem to notice. We end up walking a little more and come to a small stream. I laugh at the irony and Noah looks at me quizzically.

"Do you want to swim?" I am not sure why I just said that.

"In there? No way" he laughs and I mentally smack myself. I need to stop comparing Noah to Hardin.

"I was joking" I lie and drag him along down the trail.

It is seven before we leave the park so we decide to order pizza when we get back to my room and watch a movie. I am starving by the time the pizza comes so I eat almost half of it to myself. In my defense I haven't eaten all day. Halfway through the movie my phone rings and Noah reaches over to grab it for me.

"Who's Landon?" he asks. There is no suspicion in his voice, only curiosity. He has never been the jealous type, he never needed to be. Until now.

"He's a friend from school" I say and answer. Why would Landon be calling me so late? He's never called me for anything other than to compare notes.

"Tessa?" he says loudly.

"Yea, is everything okay?"

"Uhm, well no actually. I know Noah is there but.." he hesitates.

"What's wrong Landon?" My heart starts to race. "Are you okay?"

"Yea, it's not me. It's Hardin" he says and my heart drops.

"H..harry?" I stutter. I am panicking inside.

"Yea, if I give you an address can you come here, please?" He says and I hear something crash in the background. I jump off of my bed and I have my shoes on before my mind catches up.

"Landon is Hardin trying to hurt you?" My mind can't make sense of what else could be going on.

"No, no." he says.

"Text me the address" I tell him and hear another crash.

"Noah, I need your car." I tell him and he turns his head sideways.

"What is going on?"

"I don't know.. it's Hardin. Give me your keys" I demand and he reaches into his pockets.

"I will come with you" he says and moves to stand. I snatch the keys from his hands and shake my head.

"No, you.. I need to go alone" I say and he looks hurt. I know it is wrong to leave him here but the only thing I can think about is getting to Hardin.