Love Me, Always (Reuploaded)

Chapter Twenty

As I stare at the girl in the mirror, I look at her unblinking. White dress. Wedding dress. Done by none other than Cinna's hands. I don't think he could make anything ugly, even if he was trying. There was just something about his talent that I'll never quite understand. But I admire it more than words can say. This dress is gorgeous and I can't imagine wanting to wear anything else. Sure it's got the Capital written all over it, but Cinna has also made it simple. Elegant? Yeah, elegant. I can't even think of another dress that would be more perfect. The veil in itself is something wonderful. Though, thankfully, is simple as well. The Capital may not like the veil as much, and nor would President Snow, but Cinna insisted.

I can't believe that I'm here, though. I'm getting married. Married to Peeta. While that sounded like a horrible disease - no, not a horrible disease, just I hadn't really thought about it when I suggested it. And looking back on it, I can see why Peeta would be upset. "He wanted it to be real." Haymitch had told me that much, but the more I've thought about it...well it's not entirely unreal...I'd just never really thought about it. Snow wants a show, and so we're giving him one, but part of me wonders why I'm so calm. What am I so calm?

"You look beautiful."

I don't even have to turn, I'd know that voice anywhere. Peeta. I don't know what it is about his voice but that is always something soothing about it. A sense of security I don't know how to explain. But I do turn to face him, and with as stern a voice as I can muster, "you're not supposed to be in here."

He smiles at me. "Madge made you something and she insisted that you must have it with you...I'd forgotten about it till right now." He holds out his hand and inside it lies a handkerchief. Mine and Peeta's initials on it. All capitalized letters but there's a smaller K on the left and a smaller P on the right. In the middle is an M. K for Katniss. P for Peeta. And M for Mellark. Mellark. The thought stops me. M-e-l-l-a-r-k. Peeta Mellark. Katniss Mellark. Katniss Everdeen Mellark. Mrs. Peeta Mellark. I'm going to be Katniss Mellark. The thought makes me tilt a little bit. "Are you okay?" Peeta is frantically grabbing my arm.

"Uh, yeah," I look up at him, "just need to sit down a minute."

"Can you even sit in that thing?" Peeta questions staring at the dress.

I hadn't really thought about the sitting down part. Something I'm definitely going to need to ask Cinna about. "I guess not." I'm more than a little frustrated. "Wait," I'm recalled back to the fact that Peeta is in my room. "Shouldn't you be somewhere else?"

"I'll go anywhere you want me to, Katniss," he beams at me. His smile is infectious and I don't know why, but I'm smiling too...I'm blushing. Oh why does he have to say things like this in such an offhand way? It's like he says them without even thinking about them. God, his honesty kills.

"Well," I say, "you should probably go get ready."

"Katniss," his head drops, "I'm wearing a suit. What more do I need to do?"

I have to laugh. He makes a good point. "What, Portia didn't give you a gorgeous gown that you can't sit down in too?" He smiles and I'm smiling. "Well, that's not fair. Now we won't match." I give a pouty lip, which sends Peeta into some frantic hysterical laugh. I try to calm him down but his laugher is infectious and I'm laughing too.

"Oh," Peeta says snapping out of his laughing. "I meant to give you this..." he watches my face as he pulls a box from his pocket, "this one is from me." I tentatively reach forward and grab the little box from his hand, as I open the box up I'm surprised - but then not surprised, because it's Peeta - to see a simple but elegant engagement ring. I look up to meet his eyes. "I figured, well, I thought..." he stammers. "Will you wear it?" I barely know what's happening, but I'm nodding. He takes the ring from the box, discarding the box onto the bed and gently slips the ring on my finger. Then when he looks up to meet my eyes this time, there's pain...some sort of agony in his face...