Waiting For You

Chapter Nineteen

My Appa

But why so early?.why'd they took my Daddy away so early,of all man who doesnt deserve their fudging life! Why my Dad!....heck yeah he was'nt a perfect man...yeah he made a mistake! Yes i wasnt his only princess.but that didnt cover the good things that he has done while he was living

"Condolence." They said and i nodded

My dad doesnt want his princesses to cry

"Ate." Kristal called me "Ate daddy's gone" nanginig ang boses nya at niyakap ko sya sabay ng pagyakap sa amin ni mommy...

We didnt grieve very long...we just grieve and carry on with our lives,because we know that Dad does'nt want us to do that he wants us to carry on with life and continue our lifestyle...but i guess that's not gonna happen anymore...nothing's same without him.It never is or never will be

The sun rised many times so as the moon.a month has passed.i kneeled and touched a cold stone.i closed my eyes,pleading to the gravity not to let it fall,it didnt,thank God,but that didnt stopped my emotions and my memories to be triggered.

All your mistakes cannot overcome the good things that you have done.you'll forever live in our hearts.

Those are the engraved words on his grave.

We thought he was perfect.but heck nobody was.you can only chase perfection but never will you succeed in capturing it but you will succeed in making yourself a better person to those who are around you.yes may iba syang anak.but Mom didnt blame or became angry for that.because she saw and appreciated more the good things that Dad did.not the ONE mistake that he has done.ONE mistake against a countless goodness..we loved him.we really do

"Kristal" i turned my back.Huh? Asan na sya? Nandito lang yun kanina ah?.ayy wait.naalala ko dito nga rin pala yung cemetery ng ex boyfriend nya,im sure she'll look exhausted again

Exhausted and depressed like...

"Daddy! Ayoko nga po kasing lumabas! Look at me? Im not in a very good shape para magpakita sa mundo" i said.paano ba naman si Dad nilabas ako ng bahay kung kailan di pa ako tapos magmukmok kay Ethan.my eyes are puffy and red like my nose,i look miserable i'ved loss weight nakadiri na ewan.anong nangyari sayo? tanong ng isang babae na nakatayo kapareho ng tindig ko i dont know i answered she shooked her head and a tear flowed from her eye then i realized why is this girl crying for me?.wait.this is me begging to have remorse for myself,i wiped the tear in my eye

A girl is looking at me...she looks so like me when i was young,she cried and hugged me.dumating si Daddy at nabitawan nya lahat ng hawak niyang gamit

"D'Dad?" Shock still filled his eyes and looked at me.i lifted the girl's face who's hugging me...she looks like me.with a more soft feautures.our eyes is the only difference her eyes shows joy and comfort but filled with sadness while mine is brown comforting and peace with happiness except that there are no other difference,then i realize...No...That cant be.i looked at my Dad and he nodded

"Ate please dont be angry" my tears only fell but i also hugged her

That's when i knew that her Mom just died when i saw her nagkataong kasama nya ang maids nya at nakita niya ako.her words still marks in my mind

"A'ate im sorry Dad never had a thought of showing me to you and i ruined it im sorry its just you seem so amazing based on Dad's stories and i cant help to hug you.your my sister.but i understand if you dont want me i just wanted to hug you.my name is Kristal po ate" she looks so innocent.her words are so pure i smiled at her and my smile mirrored to hers.i have a sister.

And i love her and it hurts me to see her grown into a wonderful girl but behind it is her white heart that is already broken by someone in an early age

"Dad do you remember when you used to rush your way to home just because i want to play princess and when mom wants to re-enact your weddings" that always cheers me up.bata eh.di ko pa alam na sobra sobra na sa time ni Dad yung na s'sacrifice nya para lang makalaro ako.i was his princess.

"Tara ate" she patted my shoulders and curved her lips to a comforting smile.

Tutal malungkot na din naman ako ituloy tuloy ko na.we bid our goodbye's and baled...breath in...breath out..."Manong Pol pahatid muna ako sa Dating bahay sa village then pahatid si Kristal i'll call you again nalang pag you need to fetch me" he nodded and smiled as his wrinkles formed in his forehead.people.they just dont stop getting older.Lord baka naman isunod nyo na si Manong Pol? Wag naman po simula bata ako nandito na yan

"Dito nalang Manong Pol" i kissed my sister's cheeks and waved goodbye.i watched the car roared to life until it was out of my sight.i turned my back.

50 steps starting here to our home.home.

1,2 it rained
3,4,5 i took out my umbrella
6,7,8,9,10 i lifted my palms up and stopped
11,12,13 i got tired
14,15,16,17 i talked to myself
18,19,20 i hummed a song
21,22,23,24 i saw a guy he was soaking wet and looked pity
25,26,27,28 i stared at him,passing him by while walking
29,30,31,32,33 without knowing my umbrella was taken out from me by the wind it flew on his side
32,31,30 i ran towards him and lifted my umbrella up and covered him
31,32,33,34 we talked
35,36,37 he asked my name and i asked his our hands collide it made me shiver with a smile
38,39,40 we laughed became friends
41,42,43 he pointed his house which i thought was mine
44,45, we were neigbors i smiled in my mind and bid goodbyes
46,47 we parted ways but he called my name i turned my back and asked why
48,49,50 but my head flew to this certain thought that i realized.that in a short time in a 50 steps through the way home,i gained another friend,loved a guy,kiss a guy then fell in love but got broken

I lifted my head up.i finished counting my steps.im infront our gate i turned to my right and my heart panged with pain.my fist formed in a rock heart, i shooked my head and knocled on our gate

I headed straight to my room,why didnt i took this out? I touched one picture.i look so happy.when will i be like that again?

I looked at my window and slid the curtains to the side.empty it is,no life,no love,no joy or anything just pitch black the same like how he left it.but this time i noticed something.i opened my window and slided up his window.i entered his room.the light from the window was the only light...his stuffs are still here.my picture was still in his frame and the sheets were the same like the last time i slept here...i slided my hands through the bed,feeling the wooden bed's texture.i sat down and closed my eyes.

Everything in his room was open like the door he used to lock and forbid me to enter.it was open.

Finally it was open.