Saving Each Other - Dramione

Try Again

I wake to the sound of my alarm for the first time in months. I pull myself into a sitting position and for the first time in a very long while, I feel ready to start the day.

By the time my bare feet hit the cool tiles of the bathroom floor, I am completely awake. I have a quick shower and I am walking down the stairs within twenty minutes.

Draco is sitting in one of the armchairs just gazing into the fire.

'Morning,' I say as I walk towards him.

'Oh, you're up. I was worried I might have to come and wake you. Did you sleep well?'

'It was amazing. If I hadn't remembered to set my alarm I think I could have slept all morning but at least now I feel like I'll make it through the day without wanting to collapse,' I say light-heartedly but it's true that that's how I've felt for more than a month and I can see that Draco knows that.

'Well, shall we go down to breakfast?' He says standing up.

'I'm starving.'

As we walk towards the great hall I start to think that this might be a pretty good day. I have all my favourite classes and I might actually be able to concentrate in them. If we don't have too much homework I might even try to get some girl time with Ginny after dinner. I haven't had a proper 'girl talk' in ages.

***

I am walking out of the Great Hall with Harry and Ginny, our stomachs filled with toast and porridge from breakfast when Ron comes walking towards the three of us. In fact, he seems to be walking directly toward me.

Ron and I have been talking politely to each other but we haven't had any real conversation since we've come back to Hogwarts. He always death stares Draco whenever he sees him but I'm trying to ignore that for the sake of our already rocky friendship. Ron will always be like my brother and I don't want to lose that.

'Hermione...' he says almost nervously.

I stop walking and so do Harry and Ginny beside me.

'Yeah?' I say looking up at him. I've always wished I could be taller so I didn't have to do this.

'I was wondering if I could talk to you alone for a minute.'

'Okay... sure,' I turn to Harry and Ginny, 'you guys go on without me I'll talk to you later.'

'Okay, see you,' Ginny says talking Harry's hand and they walk off together. I feel another slight pang of jealousy for the love that they have between them.

I follow Ron out of the Entrance Hall and into one of the side corridors where there are only a few people.

'Um... So... Hermione. I was wondering if maybe you wanted to come with me on the Hogsmeade trip in a couple of weeks. Like on a date.'

'Ron... I,' I stutter not knowing what to say.

'I know we tried this before but it was bad timing and neither of us were coping well so I agreed that it would be best to wait but now we've had some time to start to heal and I really want to try this again because I really like you Hermione. In fact, I think I love you.'

'Ron... I... I told you that I thought we'd be better as friends, I told you that I loved you as a brother. When I said that I didn't mean that we should just wait a bit until we felt a bit better, I meant that I thought we'd always be better off as friends. I still think that.

'Besides I'm still not coping well. The war changed all of us I'm never going to be the same person I was and neither are you. We tried something between us when we were both at our worst and we couldn't make it last. Our relationship could have lasted for years and still we would have hit a really rough point and we would have fallen apart because you and I were never meant to survive a bumpy road. The fact that the bumpy bit came at the start only saved us from so much more pain that would have come if it had been later.

'I think we should just be friends, like we've always been. That's always what's worked best for us.'

'But Hermione... I always thought we could be something more. I love you.'

'Ron I love you too but just as a brother. You will always be a brother to me. We have been through so much together, you Harry and I, and that has given us a bond that can't be broken. I just want to go back to what we had before.  I'm sorry Ron but my answer is no.'

As I turn to walk away I see his face start to break but I ignore it and continue walking. For once I have to think about my self.

I do not love Ron in that way and he doesn't understand how I feel. He thinks that I have already had time to heal, that I will go back to normal now. But he's wrong. It will take a lot longer than this for me to heal and even when I do I will not be the same.

Everyone changes slowly throughout their life but because the change is slow people can change together and still remain friends. However, when there is a big event or disaster everyone changes at once so people who were once very similar can become very different from each other.  Ron and I may have been right for each other before the war but now I'm wondering if we'll be able to stay friends.