Let It Snow (Bleach Fanfic)

Forgotten and Alone

 "I'm not some child who needs things kept from them."

"The way you took off says otherwise." Hyorinmaru's voice echoed through the back of Toshiro's mind.

"I took off because I can't trust anybody anymore. I could go about my duties and pretend like nothing happened, but right now I don't have any duties. I don't like this feeling."

"It's called agitation. You've still got a bit of growing up to do."

Toshiro stared up at the ceiling trying to forget the pain caused by the defrosting of his limbs and the blisters which resulted from his own stupidity. He also tried forgetting how he begged the Quincy to stay with him and the nagging feeling of being alone. "I shouldn't be reaching out to anybody. It just proves..." The young taicho paused in his thought. "It's just something that makes me look childish, and I'm not a child. I'm not allowed to be."

"What did he do to you?"

Toshiro's bright teal eyes blinked a couple of times and he turned his head to look at the girl. Something about her presence was soothing, and again the notion hit him he hadn't felt her rieatsu when she approached. "Hi." The girl ranted about the male Quincy having done something and the conversation wasn't pleasant. Then she let something slip and the young taicho felt a panicked confusion set in. "What do you mean it's his crest?"

The girl didn't answer his question, but instead stormed out of the room leaving him asking more questions. Soon after Isane came into the room and the look on her face said something upset her. Toshiro's bright teal eyes blinked a couple of times as he watched the fukutaicho of the first division began to set up a barrier. "Ise?"

"I see you still haven't eaten." The woman sat down next to the young taicho and pushed up her glasses. "You really need to eat. I really don't understand how you can normally act so mature, but right now..." Nanao blinked a couple of times as she looked at the young taicho. "I'm sorry. I shouldn't have implied such a thing."

Toshiro's bright teal eyes stared at the woman. He tried adjusting himself to position into a sitting position, but he found himself unable to push his small frame up with his bandaged hands. "Ise. Would you please help me sit up so I can talk to you?"

The woman stared for a few minutes, but then gently lifted him up so his back leaned up against a pillow. "What do you want to talk about?"

"What is it everybody's not telling me?"

"What are you talking about?"

Toshiro watched as the woman swallowed. "You, all of you are hiding things from me. You didn't tell me Matsumoto wasn't waking up."

Nanao took a deep breath. "I see your mental states finally returned to normal."

The young taicho felt his throat tighten. "Did you, all of you keep things from me because you thought I'd completely lose it?"

"That..." The woman swallowed and reached out her hand towards his face. Toshiro felt the fear rise up in his chest and he felt himself pull away. "So you're actually not better and are just putting on a brave face."

"So you are keeping things from me because I've been an emotional basket case." Toshiro looked away. "Don't you think one of the reasons I've been an emotional basket case is because nobodies told me anything? All anybody did was leave me alone." The young taicho shrugged his shoulder slightly as he felt a crick in his neck. One hand reached up to rub the spot, but he stopped himself. "Do you guys understand I'm struggling to trust you guys right now?"

"Hitsugaya Taicho." Nanao's tone of voice drew Toshiro to look her in the eye and what he saw he didn't like. "There are a lot of things you couldn't even begin to possibly understand."

The young taicho stared at the fukutaicho as the corners of his lips twitched. "Understand? She..." His attention drifted from Nanao to the doorway when a loud thud occurred. Toshiro grimaced on seeing the male Quincy sitting on his bottom with a rather pained look on his face while a barrier shimmered between them. "Ise. Please. Take down that barrier. I need to talk to him."

Toshiro watched as a horrified look spread across Nanao's face. "Talk to him? You do know who he is right?"

"No. I don't think I do." The young taicho watched as the man got to his feet.

"I don't appreciate your sarcasm Hitsugaya Taicho."

"I'm not being sarcastic." Toshiro saw the man's facial features twist up in anger and felt a fiery rieatsu flex. The boy swallowed knowing Nanao managed to upset the man. "I think you pissed him off."

"What the fuck are you trying to do woman?"

"I'm keeping you away from Hitsugaya Taicho. That's what I'm doing."

"Did the fact I told you I have more legal right to be his legal guardian then you do really bother you that much?" The man pointed his finger at her. "Don't think I'm going to be backing down bitch."

"Legal guardianship. Why would..." Toshiro turned to look up at the necklace and then at Nanao and opened his mouth to say something, but her hands quickly grabbed his shoulders.

The woman looked him right in the eye and the young taicho saw some kind of fear. "Hitsugaya Taicho. I want you to stay out of this. He can't come past that barrier as it prevents Quincy from going past."

The boy took a deep breath thinking about what he needed to do. "No."

"No. Do you even..."

"How can I understand when nobody explains something to me?"

"He's dangerous. He'll attack us."

"Will you take down the barrier if he promises not to attack."

"I'm not going to take down that barrier until something's done about him. You don't understand that I can't trust him do you?"

Toshiro looked down at the ground and began to move himself off the bed despite the pain he felt. "If you don't remove the barrier so he can come speak to me then I'll go to him."

The young taicho watched as Nanao's eyes widened indicating what he said didn't please her and she placed her hand on his shoulder to try preventing him from getting up. An irritated sound came from the male Quincy causing him to look up and see the man wasn't pleased with his actions. "Kid? Are you crazy? Are you really trying to get yourself hurt?"

"Is he referring to aggravating my injuries from going outside or something else?"

"Look, if you make sure he stays in bed I'll promise not to attack or anything."

"Ise." Toshiro's arms relaxed at his side. "I'll stay put if you let him in. There is something that I need to talk to him about that only he can tell me." The horror on the woman's face wouldn't go away like he hoped it would. "In private as well." A sigh escaped her lips and he found himself pulled into a tight hug, and his cheeks heated up. The heat remained even after she let him go. "I don't understand. Why is she so worried? This is embarrassing."