voicemail ~ ai

c.6

Ashton

"Irwin! Come on, son! You know you were supposed to pass to Richards!" Coach Myers yelled at me from half field. Everyone on the field paused to look at me. I bent over, hands on my knees, catching my breath. I was one of four freshman on the team. College soccer was definitely more intense than high school. "Don't tell me you're hot, Irwin! Thought your Florida skin would adjust perfectly to this Oklahoma weather!"

"I'm fine!" I stood upright.

"Come here, Irwin." I jogged over to coach who was pacing back and forth, taking of his hat and running his hand through his thin gray hair. "Why don't you take a break. I'll let Macintosh go in for you."

"If I didn't do a good job I can work harder. Just tell me and I'll do it." I told him. Coach still shook his head and told me to take a break. I turned away and sat down on the bench, raking my fingers through my hair. I could tell that coach didn't think I wasn't doing that good of a job. He wanted to use my exhaustion as an excuse, but it was clear.

I listened to May's voicemail after practice, which made me more mad than I already was. I threw my phone across my bed. I watched as it slid onto the floor but I didn't care. Between coach and May's voicemail, I wasn't having the best day. What was I supposed to say when I called her back? What was she going to tell me?

"Dude," my roommate and teammate, Josh, said to me. I looked up at him as he stood in the door frame of the bathroom. He must have just finished his shower because he stood still dripping wet but with clothes on. "What was that noise?"

"Nothing, my phone just fell on the floor." I got up quick to retrieve it, making sure it didn't break.

"Oh I forgot to tell you that Laura is coming over tomorrow and we're going out." I looked at Josh, wondering why he was telling me this. It had been almost two months since we started college and he already had a girlfriend, after his previous one he had the first week. "She's bringing her friend from the team. They're both freshman like us." I continued to stand and look at Josh until he got to the point quicker. "I guess I have to spell it out for you, Ashton, it's a fucking double date. Plus you seem to need it."

"What's that supposed to mean?" I folded my arms across my chest, watching Josh's expression change from excited to panicked.

"You've seemed kind of upset lately. When you first got here you were really excited, but the last few weeks not so much. That's all. A couple of the other guys have seen it, I wouldn't be surprised if coach thought that too. He takes you out a lot now and you were practicing as a starter." At the end of his speech he slicked back his wet, thick, blonde hair. I watched as many drops of water flew off. Didn't he know how to dry off properly?

"So are you and everyone else like fucking detectives now? Can't you all just mind your own business?" I asked angrily.

"Ashton I didn't mean it like that. I didn't mean to make it seem like we're trying to intrude on your life. It's just what we've been seeing and we're all curious." He explained. "What's been going on?"

"I'll go on that date." I told Josh, completely ignoring his question. Neither of us really got back on the subject again after that. Josh returned to the bathroom and I climbed back into bed and scrolled through my phone.

I never called back May or listened to her call again. I was getting tired of going back and forth like this. The bullshit voicemail we always left each other, the missed calls, and sad voices. I didn't want any of that and I couldn't wait for us to talk it out, because who knew what that was actually going to be. I needed to make a change on my own.