Spectrum (Frerard, Petekey)

28: it's the end and i am crying

Gee had initially detested the whole idea of this: making a big fuss out of it all, but Alicia had really put so much effort in, and as she stood somewhat awkwardly in Alicia Simmons' living room, she came to realise just how much she mattered to these people.

It wasn't much, it wasn't anything spectacular, but for Gee, who hadn't expected nor wished for anything, it was more than enough.

It was a leaving party: Alicia's idea, and organised by her, Lindsey, Jamia, Jessicka, Chantal, Kitty, and Frances - they'd gotten shitty party food and even shittier alcohol, and those cliché plastic cups, and Alicia was even sacrificing her punk rock only attitude to listen to Lana Del Rey, and all for the benefit of Gee.

Who could never have really anticipated just how much she could be missed by some girls she always thought were much better than her.

It was weird, and Gee didn't know if her head was spinning from the situation as a whole or the fucking dodgy ass alcohol punch in her hand - they really had put effort into this, because it honestly didn't taste that revolting, still, it wasn't top of Gee's list of things she most wanted to drink in the world, but she really appreciated it - she appreciated it all.

She was going to really fucking miss them; she was going to miss everything, and the more she felt about that, the more she didn't want to go, but she knew she had to - Frank had gotten that into her head at least.

She'd spent the morning with Frank; the two just sat together in bed, and Frank had smoked at least six cigarettes and Gee hadn't complained once - just simply sat there and watched the way his cheeks hollowed out a little as he inhaled, and watched the way the light caught his eyes and they seemed to turn golden: beautiful, so fucking beautiful.

He'd given her his jacket: the leather one that didn't quite look right on Gee with her rose pink lipstick and fucking shimmery silver eye shadow, but that didn't matter at all, because it was Frank's and it smelled like him and she was never going to take it off, and she was never ever going to wash it, as fucking disgusting as that sounded.

"You alright?" Frances seemed to appear out of nowhere, standing beside Gee, taking a drink from a can of beer in her hand. "Come on, honey, don't get all soppy right now."

"Fucking watch me." Gee laughed a little, brushing her hair away from her face. "I'll get as soppy as I can."

"That's no way to spend your leaving party, though, come on, Gee, smile, fucking smile because you're getting the fuck out of here and a good chance in life." Frances told her; her tone stern, and suddenly it sounded so simple and easy, despite the fact that it was really anything but. "California is gonna be great, I promise you- hey, maybe you'll get a tan and stop looking so fucking pale, hey, how about that?"

Gee laughed, "I don't think I'd look good with a tan- god, Mikey's gonna... I think Mikey would rather die than get a tan," she smiled a little, "he'll get used to it, though. I guess I will too. I guess that's just what you've gotta do, because you can't stop and breakdown and hope the world's going to wait for you... doesn't work like that."

"No," Frances let out a sigh, "doesn't. Gonna miss the fuck out of you, Gee."

"I'll miss you too." Gee met her with a smile.

"You want me to keep an eye on Frank for you, seeing as he's in my year? And I see way more of him than I'd like to." Frances offered, groaning a little to dramatise her words.

"Don't like fucking stalk him - I think I can trust him." Gee shook her head, laughing.

"I don't mean like that, just to make sure he's okay and you know, be there for him." Frances explained, "he's gonna miss you."