Knockout

Chapter 32

I didn't really feel like coming to this party. I didn't want to see my mom, I know she'll just pry. Thatcher seems to be enjoying himself though, I know he misses his dad. The party itself is rather large, mostly Paul's friends from work and Thatcher's extended family that he doesn't know very well.

"Rachel, will you help me with this please?" Thatcher's aunt Anna asks me.

I nod and help her carry a few cases of beer over to Paul's work friends. She touches me on the shoulder as a thank you and I walk back over to where Thatcher is sitting. He's sipping some iced tea and scoots over on the outdoor love seat to make room for me.

"You know I've been thinking." He starts, putting his arm around me. I can smell the alcohol on his breath, knowing him he probably spiked that iced tea.

"About what?" I laugh once, turning to look at him.

"Answer me this." He says, taking a drink of his tea. "How is it that you've managed to go nearly four months now with no sex?"

"Thatch!" I whisper yell at him.

"I'm being serious." He tells me. "I think it's high time you did something about that."

"I'm not going to talk about this right now." I protest, laughing once.

"You know what I think?" He asks, drinking some more.

"What?" I raise my eyebrow, stifling my laughter.

"I think you need a good old fashioned one night stand." He purses his lips and nods. "Some no strings attached, meaningless sex."

"I don't know Thatch." I shake my head twice, crossing my legs. "I don't want to just hookup, you know?"

"Well I know what you want." He says. "But apparently he's not comin' back any time soon. You gotta focus and what you need."

"It just doesn't seem right to me." I tell him.

"I have a great idea." He sits up and turns towards me. "You should do it with Maverick."

"Thatcher!"

"Think about it Rach." He sets his iced tea down on a side table. "He wouldn't be meaningless but he wouldn't be meaningful either. He's already got big doe eyes for you, he's probably just as lonely as you are, and he's very tall so you know what that says about the downstairs." He flicks his eyebrows and I shove him.

"Thatcher Evans." I widen my eyes at him and he giggles like a child being scolded. "I think you are done with this." I take his iced tea off the table and set it down next to me.

"Come on." He urges. "He's perfect."

"I can't do that." I shake my head.

"Why not?" He whines.

"Because." I say. "It wouldn't be a one time thing with him. Like you said, he likes me."

"Well usually they're supposed to like you." He laughs and then gets serious. "Rach, I know you're nervous because of Marshall. But at some point you're gonna have to move on, why not start now?"

I know Thatcher's drunk and I shouldn't listen to him but that part sticks with me. I mean, if Marshall gave even the slightest fuck about me he would've at least answered my calls. I spent so long trying to convince myself that there was a deeper reason as to why he left that I ignored the most obvious possibility, maybe he's just a fucking dick. Maybe he really is the guy that sleeps with five girls, well six now if you count me. Maybe he really is the guy that hooks up in bars and hits on the closest girl to him. After all, that's how I got tangled up with him.
But all that is hard to believe even now. I don't want to believe that everything he said to me was crap. I don't want our initials in Recovery to be nothing more than a spur of the moment thing. I wanted everything with him. I fell in love with him. But it's like Thatch always says, if something seems too good to be true then it probably is.