Gone

Chapter Fourteen

Chapter Fourteen:

I was so confused; everything was spiraling crazily out of control. Ash kissed me, she kissed me; and it wasn't one of those friendly 'thank you' pecks some friends do.

No, this was a serious, passionate kiss that I had responded to. Why, though? Why did I respond?

I knew I didn't have feelings for Ash a girl and girl relationships were considered the works of the devil. Even though I had nothing against gays, I wasn't gay.

But why did I kiss back?

I'd been asking myself that very question for the last week. Thanksgiving hadn't been anything special at my house and I hadn't gone out meaning I had a lot of time to think.

I hadn't called Ash because I didn't know what I was feeling. So if we spoke about the kiss what would I say? Ash was hard to figure out and putting her on the spot, I knew, would make her pull away. But, how would I get her to talk about it?

When break was over, I hoped that things would be normal between Ash and I. But, of course, it wasn't, at all. I waited by the gate for her to show up on Monday morning but I never saw her.

Since I'd started hanging out with Ash and Kelsey I didn't spend so much time with Emma and the others. Emma said my "social status" was suffering because I hung out with them, they were "rejects" but I didn't care. When I was with Aaron we were usually alone.

After Ash kissed me the first person I spoke to about it was Aaron. I told him he needed to stay calm about it and he had. I'd left out the part about kissing back, but pretty much told him everything.

When he got into that fight with Ash at school I'd freaked out. I knew they were probably fighting about the kiss between Ash and I. It was pretty brutal and the only gossip that was going around school the rest of the week.

I tried to talk to Ash, civilly, a couple of times. But every time I did she'd blow me off or told me to leave and that she was busy. I asked her about the project on Thursday, considering it was due the next week. She told me vaguely that she had it covered.

By Friday she was making me seriously angry. I had assumed that she might want some space or that she would give me space so I could think. She was giving me plenty of space, maybe a little too much, more than I wanted or needed.

Ash sat with Kelsey and I at lunch but the tension between all three of us made it too uncomfortable to speak. What had happened between Ash and Kelsey I didn't know, but I would leave it between them.

I came up with a plan to force Ash to talk to me. I didn't care if I was putting her on the spot anymore, we needed to talk. I needed to save our friendship no matter how many shattered pieces I cut my hands on.

Between 6th and 7th period I hid in the janitor's closet I knew she would be passing because we walked the same way. I opened the door and yanked her into the small, dimly lit room and locked the door behind me.

"What the heck, Holly!?" She shouted and glared at me.

"Sorry, but we need to talk." I crossed my arms over my chest, now that the plan worked I had to get her to talk.

"We don't, it was just a drunken mistake." Ash mimicked my stance and sent me a warning look. She did not want to talk about this.

I shook my head, "We can forget about that, you know. Just pretend like it never happened and just be friends. Please?" My voice took on a pleading tone.

Ash pursed her lips and glanced down at her feet, a frown creasing her forehead. "One question."

I nodded, "Anything."