home (halsey)

22

Ashley

The week before the wedding. Booking nail appointments, deciding whether or not to dye my hair again, pulling every shoe imaginable out of my closet, and stress eating.

This was what my week consisted of.

I sat on the bathroom floor, an open bag of chips and a bottle of black hair dye beside me. Shoving my hand in the bag, I grabbed a handful of the crispy potatoes and shamelessly shoved them into my mouth.

With my free hand, I decided to tweet some fans and answer their questions.

@galaxyhalsey: ASH how is wedding planning going so far??

@halsey: @galaxyhalsey good, I think. I'm on my bathroom floor eating barbecue potato chips.

@fcknfrangipane: AM I INVITED TO UR WEDDING

@halsey: @fcknfrangipane duh babe

The knock on the door broke me out of my thoughts, pulling my attention away from my phone. I frowned and wiped my hands off on my jeans.

"Honey?" The silent voice spoke, the creaking of the door sounding louder than her words. My mother stood at the door-side, luggages and plane tickets in hand.

"Mom, you made it," I smiled like a little child, pushing myself up to attack her with a hug. Burying my face into her neck, I felt loved and at peace. Her typical scent of lavender and vanilla soothed me and reminded me of my childhood.

"The rest of the family is unloading their things. Why are you in here by yourself?" She laughed, pulling me away and rubbing the sides of my arms.

"I sent Maya off to a spa to relax a bit. If you think I'm stressed, try taking a look at her," I laughed, boosting myself up to sit on the edge of the sink.

My mom placed her things down beside my nightstand and met me back in the bathroom, grabbing the bottle of hair dye and examining it.

"Again? Haven't you fried your hair enough, Ash?" She teased, causing me to stick my tongue out at her. "I'm kidding. Do you want me to dye it for you?"

I nodded my head and quickly pulled a chair from my room, sitting down on it as my mom prepped the dye. She stood above me, her hands working feverishly to part my hair.

"How has everything been?" She asked as she shook the bottle, tightening the cap and beginning to squirt it onto my scalp.

"Pretty well, for the most part. It still hasn't hit me that I'm like, about to get married in 7 days. What if I throw up during the ceremony out of nervousness?" I frowned, laughing.

She smiled and lathered the dye into my hair, looking into my eyes from the mirror.

"My little girl is getting married," Mom gushed, pretending to cry. I laughed and played with the torn ends of my shirt.

"I'm so lucky I found Maya, mom. I was honestly such a mess before her. Remember that? Every night I would come home drunk after shows and have at least two empty packs of cigarettes in my pockets," I shuddered at the memory, tiny goosebumps appearing on my arms.

I really was a complete train wreck. My life was a continuous cycle of failures and disappointment, not giving me much of a reason to appreciate everything in it. The routine I had was constant.

Wake up, smoke an entire pack of cigarettes, eat only one meal in the morning and hope that it would last me the entire day, soundcheck for shows, rehearse, perform, get drunk, sleep, and wake up wondering why the fuck bad things were always happening to me.

I wasn't serious, either. I was more of a hook-up and avoid commitment type of girl. Every hook-up, every heartache, every bad memory for me was made in a hotel room. My life was a series of inconstant events, leaving me even more dazed than I already was.

Hotel rooms have been major influences in my life, believe it or not. I made all my memories in crappy hotel rooms after shows, I had one night stands, I stared out at the sunrise and got drunk at 5 in the morning, and hell, I met the love of my life at the end of it all.

The world works in strange ways, but I know that Maya was put in the same hotel room as me for a reason. It's corny, I know, but it's just not something you see everyday.

Not a day goes by where I forget about our first encounter. Maya was a cheeky little thing, giving me attitude and acting like she owned the place right from the start. As much as she pissed me off, I found her intriguing. We clicked eventually, the last two puzzle pieces in my life joining together and completing the picture of my perfectly imperfect life.

The silence I sat in while my mother dyed my hair allowed me to willingly continue my trip down memory lane and reminisce on both the good and bad times. I've had my share of both, and these things have truly shaped me into the woman I am today.

And now that the bad times have slowly diminished, there hasn't been a time where I haven't been grateful for Maya and the things she has done for me. No one in the world can make me as happy as she does. I wish I could express my love for her in words, but I just can't put together my thoughts into something that will completely capture them.

My Maya is so beautiful, so kind, so intelligent. She is my better half, always teaching me new things in life, whether intentionally or not. My Maya is the one I know I can turn to after a shitty day. My Maya gives me a reason to wake up every morning and do what I love the most. My Maya means so much to me, and I truly hope that she knows that.

As I looked into the mirror and stared at myself, I came to a sudden realization.

I loved the woman that I was turning out to be. I had progressed so far in life and I owed it all to one person.

Maya Moore.

The absolute love of my life, and I wouldn't have it any other way.

A/N:

YOU GUYS I'm actually fangirling about my own story but I have a reason to, okay?

the wedding happens in the next chapter and I'm going to make it so long and detailed and cute oh my god

hold tight and prepare yourselves because things are about to get adorable up in here

thank you for your continuous support, too! you guys give me motivation to write. love you so much :)