Illegal Love~ Newtmas

Im Sorry

Chapter 17
Thomas's pov
I awake to the feeling a Newt moving in my arms. Everything from last night comes flooding back to me and I look at Newt remembering how much he drank. From the look on his face I knew he was hungover and had a major headache.

"I put some water and Advil on the night table last night, I figured you'd wake up with a bad headache" I say, my voice raspy.

"Thank god." Newt says taking two pills.

When he's done he lays back down and cuddles into me again. I look at the clock and see its 7:10am. I am definitely going back to sleep, I mean it's a Saturday.

"Sorry for last night." Newt whispers.

"You remember?" I ask shocked.

"Everything up until I downed I don't know how many drinks."

Everything I wish he would forget he remembers. Why couldn't I have just stopped the date after the perfect time we had together? Why did Claire and Ethan have to ruin that night.

"I must have said some stupid things and been pretty annoying, sorry." Newt continues.

"I actually found it very cute and entertaining." I giggle and Newt groans.

Thomas wanted to fall back asleep but Ethan and Claire kept taking over his thoughts and he couldn't take it anymore. He needed to talk to Newt.

"I'm sorry." I say not sure if Newt is still awake or not.

"It's my fault I drank to much." He replies turning over to look at me. I could see in his eyes he new what I really meant.

"I know you said you understand and it's fine but it's not and I want you to yell me and tell me you hate me like any normal couple would ."

Newt sighs, "I don't hate you Tommy. I know you were trying to get him off, that's all that matters."

"Last night before you went to sleep you asked me why I didn't try harder to get him off."

Newt sighs again, "Thomas-"

"No. You were right. I should have tried harder. I could have gotten him off. I can't even look at myself... I cheated." My eyes start to water and I know I will end up crying. I hate myself. I hate myself so much.

"You didn't kiss back Tommy. And you were to shocked to use all your strength. I understand. Please don't stress this, let's think about how perfect the date was before the party downfall."

I know Newt just wants to move on from the party so I just leave it alone for now, "it was pretty perfect wasn't it."

"Mhmm." He mumbles. He probably wants to go to sleep just like me so I slowly fall into a deep sleep.

A/N sorry for not updating! it's just kinda hard to find motivation to write when I get no feedback, criticism and nobody comments ideas