Illegal Love~ Newtmas

Thomas-Tommy

Chapter 18
Newts pov
The rest of the weekend was pretty uneventful. Me and Thomas just hung around the house with Malia, refraining from being all over each other. Which was incredibly hard. Any moment we had alone we were all over each other.

Our parents never said anything about us being together so Claire and her possy must have not said anything. In some ways that worries me more. I highly doubt they will let me go for embarrassing her like that, so they must be planning something bigger.

"Tommy, wake up." I say shaking him.

"Mhmm." He groans.

"It's Monday. We have school love." He just groans again.

I would be cliche and start kissing him but instead I decide to get pay back.

"Fine then. Guess I'll have to do this the old fashion way." I say getting on top of him and straddling his body. I lean in and when I see him pucker his lips I start tickling him.

He bursts out laughing kicking and flailing his arms and legs everywhere trying to get out of my grasps but I have him in a tight grip.

"Babe. Babe. Babe." He says in between his laughs.

"Please."

"Should have woke up when I told you too." I smirk.

"I'm awake. Please stop." He says still not controlling his laughter.

I give in because of how cute he his and peck him on the lips.

"I hate you." He groans.

"No you don't, you love me." I smile kissing his lips again and he smiles into the kiss.

______

"What were you boys doing up there?" My mom asks as we sit down for breakfast.

"Well Newt here thought it was a good idea to wake me up by tickling me." He smiles giving me a playful push and I just giggle. We still act really close around our parents, just not so much that they'd suspect anything other then brotherly love.

"Me and Malia thought one of you were bloody dying." I smile at the English slang. It's so nice to listen to my mom talk because I'm not the outcast with the weird accent, it's just how we speak. When I'm at school, or with friends, even just Thomas, I always try to hide my accent and speak like them.

"I thought I was going to." Thomas laughs kissing my cheek. I freeze. That's not a brotherly thing to do. I mean maybe it would be more understandable if my mom new I was gay; just 2 brothers who are gay and really close, but my mom doesn't know. How could Thomas be so reckless?

But when I look up I see my mom is just going along like he didn't just kiss my cheek and when Malia runs by Thomas picks her up sets her on his knee and kisses her cheek. Maybe I made a big deal of nothing?

"We should go Tommy. We are gonna be late." I say just wanting to get out of the house.

"Bye Malia," he says kissing her forehead, "bye Allison," he says kissing my moms cheek. I would do the same but I just wanna get out of there so I grab my bag and head to the car, Thomas right behind me.

When we get in the car Thomas leans over to me in the passenger seat.

"Now that we are alone I can do this." He says leaning towards my lips. At the last second I turn my face and he kisses me cheek.

"Um not that?" He asks, "I don't need to be alone to do that. What's wrong Newt." The statement makes me mad.

"WHATS WRONG! WHATS WRONG THOMAS! What's wrong is what you just said! Do you even care that are parents could find out about us?! If they found out we couldn't be together! How are you not freaking out when we are on our way to school; a school that all probably know by now we are together. The way your acting doesn't make it seem like you care that if our parents found out, that we won't be aloud to be together!" Does he even care? I hate to think like that, but I can't help it. How could he love me? There's nothing to love, I hate every little thing about myself.

"Newt." He looks as if I just stabbed him in the heart. But that's how I felt and I'm tired of keeping all my feelings to myself.

"I care. I care so much. I know that our parents finding out will suck, but nothing, and I mean nothing will keep me from being with you. I know that doesn't mean we can just come straight out and tell them and that's not what I'm thinking at all. If we start doing things near them, like kissing cheeks or cuddling, they'll see it as a brotherly thing and we could stop hiding so much. That's all I was thinking Newt, I'm so sorry. I didn't want to make you feel like that. I'm a horrible boyfriend."

I sigh, "No your not Tommy. I'm sorry I over reacted I'm just scared for school today and I never really got the chance to tell my mom I am gay yet and the way you were acting... I just want the chance to tell her first so she doesn't think I was hiding it from her."

"I love you Newt."

"I love you too." I reply and with that Thomas starts the car and starts the drive to school.

I keep my eye on Thomas. Although I reassured him it all was fine he looks really upset. When I see a tear drop rolling down his cheek I know I need to ask him what's wrong.

"What's wrong Tommy?" I ask and at that statement he bursts out crying. He pulls over to the side of the road because he was in no condition to drive.

I lean his head on my shoulder and his salty tears soak threw my shirt but I just sit there stroking his back.

"Shhh, it's okay baby, tell me what's wrong." I whisper.

"I-I'm sss-soorr-sorry" he chokes out pulling his head away from my shoulder a bit. I wipe his tears but they just come right back.

"I'm overreacting. It just hurt. It hurt so bad." He continues to mumble in between his sniffs, gulps, and him choking on his tears.

It pained me to see him like this. So torn down and broken; because I know how it feels. No one should ever have to feel that pain, especially Thomas.

"Please just tell me Tommy. It hurts to see you like this."

"You. You called me Thomas. I know it's dumb but it hurt so bad. It was so foreign and it just felt like the name was so full of hate." He takes deep breaths trying to calm himself and I know he has that lump in your throat where  you are trying not to cry well talking and you just eventually start crying again.

"I didn't mean to Tommy. I was just mad and it came out. You are my Tommy. Nothing else. No one else's. I love you Tommy." I can see him crack a small smile when I say Tommy and I would do anything to see it again.

"Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy. Tommy" I say his name louder and quieter, stretching it out and singing it in some places until he has stopped crying and now has a full smile across his face.

"We are definitely gonna be late. How about me and you switch sides and I'll drive for a change." He nods and we switch sides, me in the drivers seat.

I place my hand on his thigh and FINALLY drive off to school.