Voices

c h a p t e r 5 : h i d e

L o u i s a

"Picking petals when the party's over. No, it's not any fun. 'Cause I'm fragile and you know this." - Hollow, Tori Kelly

Are you hiding from me, or am I hiding from you?

Do I want to know who you are, or do you want to know who I am?

Do you want to destroy me, or bring me down into the abyss?

I can't tell.

I just want you to go away.

Is that too much for a girl to ask?

*

"Your sister is coming back next week, you know that right?"

I nod. "Yes Mum. You told me about it in the afternoon."

"How exciting. We haven't seen her since the semester started."

Which was only a couple of weeks ago, but of course, I don't voice it.

But then again, it's only Mum who has seen her. I haven't. I haven't seen Lowel since she left the house.

But truthfully, I haven't seen the real her in a long time.

"Please go and clean her room. I washed and changed her bedsheets last night. You only need to sweep and mop it. I want her room to be as perfect as possible, just like when she last left it," she says, overly excited. "Oh, and head to the store to pick up some fresh fish and salad leaves and some herbs. I want you to prepare her favourite dish the night she returns. You know what it is."

I nod once again. "Yes, Mum. I will do just as you say."

She claps her hand, just for the sake of it. "I can't wait to see the look on her face when she returns home."

I sigh, rolling my eyes. Everything has always been about her. Mum says that she loves both her children equally, but, honestly, I think it's more than obvious that my older sister is her favourite. I mean, I know she loves me too, but whenever Lowel is home, it's always about her. It's worst now that she left for college last year as she's away from home longer.

I wait a while longer, just in case she has something else to tell me. When it's certain she doesn't, I grab my school bag that I had dumped at my feet and head towards my room, closing the door behind me. Unfortunately for me, the door handle slips from my hand and it slams shut, leaving me cringing at the noise.

"That was an accident!" I yell so that Mum - or Troy - wouldn't think I am having an anger fit or any of the sort.

I throw myself onto my bed, sinking into my soft mattress. I close my eyes, almost drifting asleep, before I realise that I can't afford to do that. My eyes shoot open and I reach for my phone, setting my alarm for 6pm, just in case I do fall asleep.

However, before I allow myself to nap, I head towards my ensuite bathroom, taking my towel that is draped over my chair as well as a fresh change of clothes in my chest of drawers along the way.

I shut the door and hang all my clothes - and towel - on the hooks behind the door and undress myself, untying my hair in the process. I step into the shower and switch on the water, the warm water running down my body, which feels like a relief, especially since everywhere else is cold, or at least, relatively cold.

What do you expect? It's springtime.

Well, at least it's getting warmer now that summer is around the corner.