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-flashback-

all day I had been feeling weird, something one of those meanie boys said.

I wanted to play with trucks with them but jimmy said I couldn't because I was a girl.

they told me to go play dress up and barbie dolls.

but that's not who I am, I didn't like that stuff.

not one bit.

because I didn't feel like a girl, I never got a long with any of them. I never felt good,

I felt weird.

when I hung out with my cousin bryan I'd always feel like I belonged, I could be who I really wanted.

I sniffled, wiping my runny nose with my sleeve.

what if mommy didn't understand? what if she got upset with me?

I walked into the house, hearing my mom cooking in the kitchen.

"mommy?" I called out, she came into the living room, a smile on her face.

"Brenna, how's mommy's little angel?" she gushed, I shuddered.

the name made me want to cringe.

"m-mommy I need to talk to you." I croaked, big fat tears were swelling up.

"oh baby, what's wrong? you can tell me anything." she pulled me over to the couch and held my hand.

"I feel weird." she turned her face up in confusion.

"weird how?"

I sighed, pulling my sleeves down and playing with my fingers nervously.

"I-I don't like being called Brenna. I don't like my clothes I wear, I don't like my hair. I don't like my body mommy, I think I'm in the wrong one." I looked up at her, she had her lips set and sad eyes on me.

"honey what do you mean by that?" she looked worried, tears rolled down my cheeks.

"mommy I don't think I'm a girl, I' think I'm a boy. no I am a boy. I-i hate everything that has to do with being a girl, it's not me. I'm not happy mommy. I wanna be myself. I'm in the wrong body and it hurts, I feel trapped. i-i don't know what to do. please don't hate me mommy, please!"

she let out a cry and hugged me tight, I cried in her shirt.

"Baby, I could never hate you. I knew something was different from the start. you always hated anything that was in the slightest girly. I want you to know that I love you, & I support you. we're gonna get through this together okay?

now, tell me what name you'd like to go by. and we can work from there alright?" I hugged her, tears of joy coming from my eyes.

"I wanna go by Brendon, I like that name. is that okay mama?" she nodded, hugging me tighter.

"I love you mommy."

"I love you too, brendon."

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I'm ready

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