Take Me Beyond Your Heart (sequel) boyxboy

*2*

**Tony Oller as Nolan Reeds**

*Nolan's POV*

I snuggled further into his strong arms, letting a content smile take over my face. This was my haven, my refuge. I never felt safer anywhere else but right here.

The death of my girlfriend, Dawn, taught me quite a lot. To live every second as if it were my last breath. To be nice to others. To be patient. And now... to love. To find a heart to touch.

I missed her, but I'd moved on. Though I didn't blame her in any way, her death triggered my health issues. I never really had problems until the shock of her passage came. She died in a car accident on homecoming night, the night we had the best time of our lives. When my brother or mother - or anyone really important to me - stepped out the house, I almost couldn't bear it. I had that constant fear that they might be harmed in some way, and at that point, I would start shaking, hyperventilating, and crying even. Sometimes I had extremely bad dreams that I woke up from, while other times, I just couldn't sleep at all.

I didn't want it to be that way, but it had gotten so bad that it was difficult to control. It put me in the hospital twice.

For the past year that Shane had been by my side, the attacks were less, and I slept a bit more. I did notice that when I dozed off knowing he was near, I slept peacefully. We were currently on my bed, and he had insisted that I try to catch up on the sleep I'd missed last night.

"I'll be here when you wake up, okay?" he promised. I hummed in response as I received his kiss atop my head. I was instantly filled with warmth.

I shut my eyes, encasing myself in my thoughts of Shane Cooper. I needed to make every single second with him count, because I knew he loved Jace more than he could ever love me. No matter what he claimed, we weren't meant for each other. Someday he'd realize that, and when that day comes, I will let him go. Unlike the day I heard about Dawn, I knew I had to be prepared.

**

"Ooh, sweetie, your brother has good news!" my mother called out to me after I saw Shane off. It was evening and he'd gone back home, unable to stay for dinner.

I saw my older brother, Justin, just smiling away as he set the plates on the dining table. He was twenty-three years old, and started working not too long ago as a lawyer. The reason why he stayed here was because of me. I felt like such a burden and obstacle because of it, trying to assure him that I had Shane. Justin was stubborn about it, saying he wasn't letting my boyfriend take his place.

"Is it about your job?" I asked him.

He grinned and shook his head, a blush covering his cheeks. "Not quite."

"Oh, no it's a girl. Is it Kalani?"

Mom nodded and clasped her hands. "Tell him, Justin!"

Justin chuckled. "I proposed to her last night."

I gasped. "She said yes? Of course she said yes! Right?" Though I knew the answer, my bright blue eyes anticipated his confirmation.

"She did." He gestured to his body. "Why wouldn't she?"

I laughed and threw my arms around him. "My baby's growing up!" I joked.

"Hey, that was my line!" Mom pointed at me. She took Justin out of the hug and embraced him. "Aw, my baby's growing up!" she repeated.

"I'm already grown up, Mom. Tell that to Nolan." He pulled away.

As we ate, we chatted about Justin's engagement and wedding plans. He felt absolutely free to tell us about his expectations when he got married to Kalani, especially children and housing. He didn't dwell too much on the moving out part after the wedding, because of me I guess. Maybe he felt that him leaving was a scary thing for me, when it actually wasn't. As long as he was safe in a house, I was fine.

It was evident how in love he was with Kalani, and when I had met the girl a long time ago, I saw her own love for him in her eyes. It was amazing to see.

I sighed, feeling so happy for my brother. "I really wish someone loved me that much," I whispered. I hadn't meant for anyone to hear but I caught Mom and Justin staring at me. I lowered my spoon. "What?"

"That Shane guy doesn't love you?" Justin queried. My eyes widened.

"N-no! I mean, he does love me, it's just..." I shrugged.

"Nolan," Mom pressed. I dropped my spoon onto my plate and sighed.

"Seriously, Mom, it's nothing. It's a bit complicated for him right now."

"Things get complicated for every couple, Nolan, so what could it be?" Justin pried.

"He... I..."

"Spit it out, sweetie, so we can help you," Mom told me, nodding for me to continue.

"He loves Jace. No, he's in love with Jace, and the only reason why we're together is because Jace told him to date me. I mean, I know he has feelings for me because he says that I make him really happy and that I'm -"

"You should break up with him," Justin deadpanned.

I shook my head in surprise. "I can't. I love him, doesn't that matter? I'll let him go when he's ready to let me go."

"Nolan." Justin placed a hand on mine. "He was never holding onto you to begin with."

"How can you say that?" I whispered, appalled.

"Please don't be mad, Nolan, I completely understand that you love him. You're my brother, and I'm telling you this because I love you as if you were my child. When you - or when anyone gets their hopes up high..." he shook his head. "It's painful when those hopes get knocked down."

"Justin's right, Nolan. If he doesn't reciprocate your feelings, it's an unhealthy relationship that you have to get out of," Mom put in. Justin's hand squeezed mine.

"We're not saying do it right away. Take your time and try to talk it out with him. Please? Do that for me, and most importantly, for yourself."

I looked at his caring, pleading eyes and slowly nodded. "Yeah, I'll talk to him."

"Okay. There's no rush. We just want you to be careful. And I promise you, I promise, you'll find the one. Boy or girl, it doesn't matter. I'm here for you and so is Mom."

I saw Mom nod with a big smile. "I see wedding bells in your future," she predicted.

I tried to pull a smile, but faking one was too difficult right now. For the first time in forever, a frown took its place on my features.

*******