Single Daddy

Chapter 12

"Summer's father?" A doctor said. I ran to him. "She stable and awake, but we took some tests and won't have them back until tomorrow morning. You can go see her for a little bit then we'll get her in a room to keep her over night." He said. "Okay..thank you." I said. He lead me back to where she is. I saw her curled up in a ball on the big bed with tears running down her face. "Aw baby." I whispered and walked over to her bed. I sat on the edge and she hugged me tightly. "Daddy I'm scared." She cried softly. It's taking everthing I have to keep myself together, knowing if she sees me showing fear it would scare her even more. I pulled her away from me and put her hair in a small bun then wiped her tears. "You need rest my love." I said softly. "You want daddy to sing you to sleep?" I asked. She nodded with a small smile. She laid down and I curled up with her and held her, then sang a song I sing to her when she's sick or upset. When she was a baby, she would stop the second I would start singing.

"Isn't she lovely
Isn't she wonderful
Isn't she precious
Less than one minute old
I never thought through love we'd be
Making one as lovely as she
But isn't she lovely made from love." She was at sleeps door step by the end of this verse, but I kept going anyway.

"Isn't she pretty
Truly the angel's best
Boy, I'm so happy
We have been heaven blessed
I can't believe what God has done
Through us he's given life to one
But isn't she lovely made from love." I herd her breathing deepen as I knew she was asleep. I covered her up and eventually dozed off and on throughout the night. Around nine in the morning, the doctor came and asked to speak with me outside. "We have the test results back." He said. He had a upseting look on his face and in his eyes, making me start to feel uneasy. "I'm sorry to tell you this Riker but...Summer has cancer." He said. His words like knives stright into my stomach. I couldn't believe what was happening. I didn't realize I was just staring at him as twenty million questions flooded my mind. "I'm very sorry, but I want to remind you that she is the best care here. She will have the bestt care a children's hospital can offer." He said. That was a little comforting, more so later than now. I looked into her room as she slept peacefully.
"How...How do I tell her-how do I explain what is going on?" I asked openly, hardly looking for an answer. "Well I couldn't tell you a specific way, because there's many." He said. I knew he was upset about telling me this, I'm kinda glad he's showing he's uneasy telling me this because that would mean he's actually a caring person. Not some cold hearted doctor that could care less if you lived or died.

Enteraly I'm in shock, as I am on the out side. How on earth will I explain to my six year old little girl that their is something in her body that will put her in a great amount of pain and could be potentially fatal? She doesn't even know what cancer is, let alone what it's gunna do to her. I'm full of questions and am running out of time.

I walked away and we to the bathroom. I just stared into space. How could this be happening? She's always been healthy. I've kept up with her doctor appointments, she's never missed a shot or meds or anything. Why her? Why did this happen to her? She didn't do anything to deserve this, she's a innocent child.
I walked over to the sink and splashed my face with ice cold water. It was a warm hospital so my body was warm and this water was icey cold, it shocked me and made me breath heavy. I put my hands on the sink and hovered over it as tears came over me. I can't wrap my head around it. I want to know why. Why is my daughter gunna have to go through painful treatment? Why is my daughter going to have to ache all day long for who knows how long? I don't understand.

"Riker?" I was brought from my thoughts. I looked up in the mirror and saw Rocky. I shot up and spun around. "Rocky...what are...what are you doing here?" I asked in a panic like voice. "It's a bathroom." He looked at me with a laughable smirk. "Oh...right." I said. "Have you been crying?" He asked more serious. I couldn't even look at him. "N-No. I uh just washed my face." I lied. "No, your eyes are puffy and you won't look at me. Riker what's going on?" He asked. I tried so hard not to break, to the point of holding my breath, but I failed. I busted into tears. I started shaking and sobbing. He came and held me but I pushed him away because I started getting angry. I didn't want to cry because that meant that it makes that nightmare even more real. I don't want this to be this way, I want to wake up.

"Riker what the hell is going on?" he asked in a rough tone. I knew he wasn't mad I was probably just scaring him. I looked up at him now tear stained but emotionless. "She...She has cancer." I said. Knives once again piercing through my stomach to say that out loud. I swear his face turned white as a cloud. "R-Riker I'm so sorry." He choked out. There was a moment of silence. "When did...When did you find out?" he asked. "Like...15, 20 minutes ago." I said. I just looked at him as he stared back. Neither one of us knew what to say. I mean what does one tell a father after they tell you their kid has cancer? I'd be acting just like him if the rolls where reversed. "Are you gunna tell the others?" he asked. I looked done, I was in this zoned out state. "I have to. I could never cover this up." I said. "I know this isn't and shouldn't be your biggest worry but...what about the tour?" He said. "Well obviously we'll have to put it on hold. Refund the tickets an all that." I said. "Do you want to tell them?" he asked. I knew he was talking about all of the fans. I just know they'll be heart broken that the tour is called off but....how do I tell them? "I don't know...how would I? I don't want to tweet that my kid is sick." I said. I can feel myself slipping into business mode. "You could make a video." he suggested. i thought about it. "I...I honestly, highly doubt I'd be able to keep my composer for less than a minute. There's no way." I said still zoned. He thought for a moment. "You could ask dad to do it." he said. I thought about it. He's super close with Summer. He almost cried when she got sick when she was 3. I couldn't ask him to do it...could I? My dad is a pretty tough dude...could he last through the video to explain?

I stood up straight and looked at Rocky. "Where is everyone?" I asked. "When I left they went to the cafeteria." he said. "Okay...lead them back up here when they're done and only tell them that they can see her." I said. He nodded and then looked at me. "What?" I asked softly. "Love you bro." he said. I smiled slightly. "Love you too. Thanks for being there for me." I said. He pulled me into a hug. He knew I needed extra support. Him showing this means a lot. He then left and went to retrieve the others, while I went back to Summer's room. I walked in and she was sitting up in her bed, eyes glued to the TV and hand going from a gold fish package straight to the mouth. I smiled.

That's most definitely my daughter. I thought to myself.

She finally noticed me leaning up against the door frame and her eyes lit up. "Daddy! You have to come watch this with me, it's so funny." she laughed falling back into her bed. I smiled and walked over. I kicked my shoes off and laid up in the bed with her. She wasn't lying, this show was funny as hell. We had a great time laughing, goofing off. Seeing her happy and laughing made my day but also broke my heart. Soon she won't be so happy, the doctor said that she would get worse overtime. I don't want to be negative and I know she won't be negative because she was raised not to be. So for now I'm just gunna enjoy my favorite song.

My baby girls' laugh.