☆ Hazel's Diary Entry #26 ☆

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Dedication: Fetch ingPenumbra, thank you so very much for all of the reads and votes! :) xx

I've been trying to fall asleep for almost as hour now, and it's just not happening.

I don't know specifically what's keeping me awake, but I do know that I can't stop thinking about a certain brunette whose diary I'm reading.

Hazel.

I'm excited to find her, and hopefully I will finally get to meet her again tomorrow, if Liam tells me where she is that is.

If he doesn't, then I guess I could always try my hand at blackmailing.

Like a normal friend.

I'm sure that'll work.

I groan, shoving off my blankets. Why is it so freaking hot?

Kicking the covers to the ground, I roll around, trying to get into a comfortable position before groaning again.

"Why can't I sleep?" I mumble, my pillow blocking the full volume of my voice.

I'm tired, really really tired, but I just can't get to sleep. And it's the worst thing ever, my eyes are even stinging.

Deciding to get up and try to wear myself out instead, I walking out of my room and out the front door, starting into a jog.

Running always helps.

Hopefully, it will tire me out enough to collapse and fall asleep as soon as I get back into my warm (hot) bed.

I fasten the pace of my jog until I'm running fairly quickly, and move to run against the grass, not wanting my feet to get more sore than they already are.

After thirty minutes or so, I slow down and begin walking back. But, I still can't shut off my mind.

Hazel.

Malefiken.

Trent the poodle.

Arvid Bradley.

My dad.

Mum.

How can I go to sleep at night knowing there's not much I can do about any of this?

Exactly, I can't.

Hazel has been messing with my head without knowing it, and of course I don't blame her, but this is all so exhausting. I kind of wish I had the guts to just stop reading her diary, to stop thinking of her, to stop liking her.

But I don't think any of that will happen any time soon.

Reaching my house, I open the front door and lock it behind me, contemplating whether or not I should do something else to distract me.

Then maybe I can finally fall into the abyss they call sleep.

Who is they anyway?

As I was trying to say, maybe I should do some drawing to help relax me.

With that in mind, I make my way back to my room, get out my sketchpad, and sit against my bed.

Grabbing a 2B pencil, I begin to sketch out a head shape, and by the time I'm drawing the eyes, I realise who it is.

Hazel.

"Damn poodles." I mutter, slamming my sketchpad shut, "Fine, I give up."

I pull myself up onto my awaiting bed, that cooks me in heat, and read one last entry of Hazel's diary.

Date: 26/03/16, Saturday

Time: 6:54pm

Dear Mister Diary,

Hey! Hello! Hi! Hola! Bonjour! Ciao!

Wait, doesn't the last one mean goodbye? Huh, I need to learn some more languages. Because, I don't know crap, and so many other people do.

Meh. Maybe one day.

What's the rush, right? I have all the time in the world to learn a language. It's not my first priority.

It's been - what? Almost a week since? - Well yeah, it's been like 5 days since I last wrote.

I feel a little better since I last wrote an entry, so that's good I guess.

I'm still quite confused, and generally down, but I'm not considering suicide any more.

At least for now, but I don't want this entry to be such a drag like the previous ones, it makes me sad just reading over them.

And anyway, Trent finally made his decision.

He's decided to stay, and wait for me. Which I really appreciate, because my feelings for Trent just keep growing, and I don't know how I would have felt if he broke up with me.

I know what he did to me is wrong, but I can't hold a grudge against him, plus, I don't want to lose him.

I saw Hunter the other day, I didn't speak to him, I just walked past with a slim feeling of longing.

But trust me when I say it has dulled dramatically, and it feels good to not like him as much anymore.

Because honestly? Having unrequited feelings for someone is exhausting, and I'd rather not.

Hunter's a great guy - that I know of - but I don't really know him on a personal level. So me no longer having a crush on him, isn't a big deal, it's more of a relief than anything.

Life moves on, so why shouldn't I?

I'm sure things with Trent will get better, and in time, I'm sure I'll find myself falling in love with him.

He isn't as bad he seems to be, he's just a bit... Misunderstood?

Not the correct word to describe him, but I can't find the perfect word.

And I believe people can change, so that means Trent can.

At least, I'll keep telling myself that until it's impossible.

Bye for now,

Hazel-The-Believer. B

P.S. On Wednesday night (movie night), when uncle Will came, he may have noticed that something was off. I was so damn tempted to tell him about dad, but I held off and instead, I just told him that Trent and I were having problems. He let it go, and we watched 'Life As We Know It' :) Yay, crisis avoided!

P.P.S. I'll be staying the night at Trent's for the first time tonight! And it's Easter Sunday tomorrow too, so, chocolate!

* * *

Sorry guys! Mum's been on the laptop all day o.o so I resorted to writing this on my phone again :o

There's only four entries left, an epilogue, and maybe a bonus chapter! :)

WOW THANK YOU SO MUCH FOR #37 IN SHORT STORY OHMF I LOVE YOU GUYS ♡

QOTC: What languages can you speak?

MA: English, and Spanish :)

- Chloe x

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