Battle of the Bands (Naruto)

Shikamaru/Temari

《-_-》
Shikamaru

Today was the Battle of the Bands, and I could care less about if we win or not.

I just want to hang out with Temari and do absolutely nothing. Is that too much to ask?

You're a pop star, moron, my conscience yells at me.

...Ok, I see your point. But still...

I hear the door open and in comes Neji, who looks like...well, a mess, for sure.

Ah, the face of rejection. I could spot that face anywhere. I think.

"Finally asked her out, eh?" I ask. He just sighs and flops onto the cushion next to me. "I'm guessing that's a no."

"She's really insecure, dude," Neji says. "I don't know how I can reach her."

Don't ask me what I--

"What do you think I should do?"

Dammit, I thought. I just wanted some alone time for once.

I type something on my phone, then exhale through my closed lips, causing them to make my favorite sound.

"Maybe try another way to ask her out. Girls like over-the-top stuff," I suggest.

"Like what?" Neji asks, looking hopeless on the sofa.

"Uh," I think for a moment. "Try getting a plane to write out, 'Tenten, will you go out with me?'"

"Too much."

"Take her to a theme park." I try again
"Like we'll have time for that." He sighs.
"Make her food?"
"I'm a horrible cook!"
"Get her a bunch of gifts."
"I can barely afford a cup of ramen."

I groan. "Well, then you're on your own."

Neji sits up and looks at me hopelessly. "Come on, Shiki! You're the smartest person I know. There must be some way to ask her out."

I sigh, then spend a few moments typing on my phone and thinking.

She's insecure, so she must've rejected him because of that. Neji must've told her she's the most beautiful girl in the world.

That's the most basic line ever. Even Neji should know better than that.

"You're a ladies man, dude," I say after a while. "Don't use basic lines like, 'You're the most beautiful girl I've ever seen.' Show her that you can embrace her insecurities."

Neji thinks for a moment, then nods. "I see where you're coming from." Then he groans and put his head in his hands. "But the thing is that she's gonna think I'm saying that to make her feel better. She won't take me seriously!"

It's my turn to groan. "You told me you gave up going to med school just to become a pop star, but more importantly, because she was going to become a pop star, too. Now if that doesn't convince her that you love her, then I don't know what will."