Times Change [UNDERGOING EDITS]

Chapter Twenty Three

The next week, I sat on the front porch steps, smoking and thinking about everything. I had started working more, smoking more, crying more, the last few weeks had sure been a mess. I felt a pain n my chest as I thought back just two weeks.

As I sat crying next to Dally, I was shoved forcefully away from his body by police officers. Darry came and picked me up off the ground, backing away as the officers shouted at him. He stood there holding me while I sobbed along with the rest of the gang. Then Ponyboy passed out, and Darry ordered Soda to stay home with me while he took Pony to the hospital. Soda made me sleep with him in his and Ponyboy's room, he didn't trust me to be alone. 

I didn't sleep much that night. I kept waking up crying in the night, wishing for Dally to hold me close and tell me everything would be okay. 

The cuts on my knees from where I had fallen to the ground next to Dally were still healing. Soda said they were likely to scar. I wanted them to scar, so I would always remember.

A tear rolled down my cheek and I quickly wiped it away as I heard the front door open. Ponyboy came and sat next to me, reaching for the pack of cigarettes laying on the step.

"No," I snatched up the box before he could grab one. Ponyboy gave me a confused look. I sighed and crushed my cigarette with the toe of my shoe, "You still ain't looking that good and if you're going to smoke it won't be because I gave you the cigs." We sat in silence for a while before Ponyboy spoke up.

"They're really gone, aren't they?"

I looked up at him in surprise, he must have finally came to his senses. "Yeah," I said sadly, "They are."

Ponyboy leaned his head on my shoulder and I wrapped my arms around him, leaning my head against his. I let the tears fall down my cheeks, not bothering to hold them back anymore.

"I miss them," I whispered tearfully.

"Me too," Ponyboy whispered back, "It sure hurts a lot."

"I know little buddy, I know." We sat there for a few minutes and shared our grief of losing our friends.

~~~~~~~~~~

That night at dinner Ponyboy and Darry were arguing about Pony's grades again. I dropped my head onto the table with a loud bang, covering my ears with my hands to show my disapproval of their bickering.

"No, you are not dropping out," I snapped, lifting my head up when Ponyboy mentioned it.

"Well why not? You and Soda are doing fine..."

"Leave Allison alone," Darry interrupted, " You're a smart kid Ponyboy, you could get a scholarship and go to college like none of us will get to. Johnny and Dally were our friends too, but you can't just stop living life because they're gone!" I stiffened up when he mentioned Johnny and Dally.

"You let Alli drop out of school!" Ponyboy yelled, "Why can't I?"

I jumped out of my seat. "Johnny was my best friend! And I was going to marry Dallas one day for crying out loud, Ponyboy!" I shouted, "The only reason I ain't in school is because I beat the shit out of the girl that pointed out the fact that I got a ring and no husband!"

"Sit down, Allison," Darry said calmly. Then he turned back to Ponyboy, "Point is, while I run things around here you're not dropping out and if you don't like that then you can get out."

"You'd like to see me out wouldn't you? You'd like to see me put in a home! Wouldn't he, Soda?" Pony asked angrily, turning to our other brother.

Sodapop, who had remained silent during the whole ordeal jumped up too. "Oh, why do you guys always...Why can't you ever..." Then he turned and ran out the front door again.

"Goddammit you guys!" I cried. "You can't do anything but fight! See what it's done to Soda?"

Then I turned and hurried out the door after him, with Pony and Darry hot on my heels. Soda was already way ahead of us. Darry shouted for me and Ponyboy to circle around the sides of him. Pony went to the right and I veered off to the left. Eventually Ponyboy caught up to him and knocked him over. They were both laying on the ground breathing heavily by the time Darry and I caught up.

"I'm sorry I ran off like that. I just can't stand it when you guys fight, it's like I'm being pulled in three different directions. You dig?"

Pony and Darry looked startled, I guess we never realized what it was doing to Soda to hear us fight. I hated hearing Darry and Ponyboy shout at eachother, it must have been worse for Soda whenever I would join in on the scream fests.

"I just can't take sides like you want me to," Soda admitted, running his hand through his hair, "I see where you all are coming from. Darry takes everything too seriously and yells to much, but he's given up a lot just to take care of the three of us when he could have stuck us in a home. Alli's been through so much, she lost her best friend and the guy she loved in the same night, she just wants to see her family stay together. And Darry, you need to lay off some, Ponyboy's trying his best, and he's a kid, he's going to make a lot of mistakes before he figures it all out. You need to try to see things from their point of view, they feel things differently than you."

He took a deep breath and continued with tears staring to brim his eyes, "We're all we have left, and we gotta stick together. If we don't got eachother we don't got nothing and if you don't got nothing you end up like Dallas...and I don't mean dead, Alli."

I wiped a tear from the corner of my eye, "Yeah, like he was before he was dead. He didn't care about nothing or no one...well, except for me...I guess."

"He loved you," Soda sniffed, "You should have seen the way he looked at you when you were reading, or cooking, or fighting, you would think you were the one that made the sun rise in the morning. I was glad to see something could crack his tough exterior, that he wasn't completely cold."

I wrapped my arms around my brother, hugging him tightly as more tears rolled down my face. "I'm glad it was you, Alli," he whispered. 

Soda looked around at the three of us, "Can we just...not fight anymore?"

"Sure little buddy, we won't fight no more," Darry said, messing up his hair. "No more fights, okay Ponyboy? Allison?"

Me and Ponyboy looked at eachother. "No more fighting," we agreed.

And after that night things got a lot easier at home. Ponyboy had started applying himself to his schoolwork again, and Darry hollered less and tried to see things from our point of view more. Together with the gang, we slowly started to heal and get our lives back on track.

I ain't saying it was easy, I'm just saying I'm glad I had my boys right there with me.