Ishqwala Love

Chapter 22 - Family secrets

Natasha's POV

Sid's been acting really cold towards me. ITS like the fun and clown Sid was left back in India. It's all my fault why he's all serious now. But he's been rude to me a lot and it's bothering me. This is not like him. Maybe it's the fact he has feelings for me and me marrying IK that's bothering me. Kavya told me how she tried to get close to him but he refused anD admitted to being in love with me and I WANT TO be with him too. I mean he  declared his love for me, the guy who basically used to call me ugly with the nickname plain Jane. He's the type of guy who does not want commitment but he wants it with me. Or maybe it's just lust because he's getting revenge on IK for taking his girls and now he wants to do that back by playing with my heart.

I try to get hold of Sid and catch him just before the party and can't help but confront him.

"Why are you being like this?" I ask

"Like what ? " he asks

"Ignoring me. I thought we were okay I mean I understand about your feelings for me. I feel the same way the feelings that really makes me question if I'm marrying the wrong brother but there's nothing we can do about it. Maybe if I met you first" I say

"You did meet me first .." Sid says

"This can't be a co incidence that we keep crossing each other's path. Maybe there's a reason behind it. I don't know we did become each other's "soulmates" at love retreat. I'm sorry to do " I realise all the signs that shows we are destined to be together.

"Please just shut up. Not everything is about you okay it's my family shit nothing do with you" he screams at me and bangs the wall

"Do you want to talk about it?" I ask

"With you ? No no. Yesterday your rejecting me and now your telling me you love me back. Well I don't love you I take it all back. It's all just silly me lusting or be you" he snaps at me.

"I'm sorry but your giving me mixed signals too" I say to him.

"It's my dad okay. No matter how hard I try I've never been the better son. It's always been IK. No matter how much I do better than IK he's always getting praised while I'm getting all the blame. IK had always got what I wanted even you. He always wins. I've found out the reason why. " he opens up nearly crying. I ask why.

"Because..cuz I'm his illegimate child. He said he regrets having me. I found out..few days ago.. He's had an affair with Selina's mother who is my mums brothers wife. And I'm the product..of it..all evil. Maybe that's why I set out to ruin your relationship. My mother has been so good treating like her own son despite knowing her husband had a pre marital affair. I don't want that. So I have decided I'll get out of your life soon. I don't know how but we'll have to sort something out because I don't want our lives to be like my parents" he says to me. I hold his bad as a gesture of comfort.

"I'm sorry to hear that. You'll be a much better dad than your dad. Your kids will be lucky to have you as their. The way you can get revenge on your dad is by being a better father than him. Your not evil. It's him that's evil" I comfort him.

"I don't want anything like that with us. So have a happy married life with IK and I'll be out of your way. No matter how we are gonna go it but we had to forget any feelings. It wasn't suppose to happen" he says to me.

Yeah it wasn't but it did and I wish I could just forget these feelings but the more I try to get over him. The deeper I fall for him.

"So you say you love me to get revenge on IK for taking what's yours. Look I'll tell IK ..about us and then whatever happens will happen. He deserves to know the truth " I say to him

"No I genuinely love you. I have never felt like this for any girl for you and no that'll hurt him. IK is a good guy he'll keep you happy and give you a better life than I ever could. I've realised that after what you've said" he says.

"I'll have to tell him the truth I can't live a lie like this. Whatever happened between me and you and I it ends here. The whole thing ends after I tell IK the truth" I say to him because I can't do this anymore. I can't lie to IK about us anymore. I don't want anything like IK and SIDS father to happen to us.

"We may never cross paths but IK deserves to know the truth before we make a mistake and live with guilt" I add and we both agree and breakdown crying as this may be the last time as lovers.

"I can get over you I mean we are not even meant to be together so that's not a problem but IK knowing about us will hurt him. Maybe you'll fall back in love with him and we'll fall out of love. I mean we tried the friends thing but that didn't work it just increased our feelings for each other. A permanent solution is needed and I don't know what it is. I'm not good for you. I cannot give as much as IK. I don't even have a career so I cannot provide for you either we'll probably be living in your expenses so is getting together will be like punishment for doing this to IK.
Me and you getting together will make my mum hate you and blame you for hurting IK and dad blame me and your parents hating me. So why get into a relationship full of hatred" he says

For the next few days my sadness grows more intense. I can't believe this thing ended. The romance between me and Sid ended before it even started. Maybe it's the sign we are not meant to be with each other and Sid is not the love of my life but IK. I mean IK's father is happy with his mother even though he has feelings for IK's late biological mother who he thought was just his Mami.
I still can't stop thinking about Sid no matter how hard I try to think about IK and just focus on me and him and act like Sid never existed.

All the moments we shared such as the time we were watching SRK's new Rom com and I was one one side of IK enjoying the movie while Sid was sleeping on IK's shoulder on the other side due to boredom so I kicked him with my heels