You Crack Me Up, Steven (A Sam & Max + Steven Universe Crossover)

Epilogue

Meanwhile, the DeSoto had successfully left the earth's pull, and Sam & Max were now driving through the soupy chunks of the Multiverse.

"And that's ANOTHER case for the history books, Max. We solved a missing person's case, met four sentient rock minerals and an impressionable youngster, and got to experience our first real taste of progression." Sam sighed contently.

"What're you talking about, Sam?" Max asked. "We've ALWAYS been progressive!"

"No, Max. We've always been AGGRESSIVE."

"Right. What did I say?"

"Ah, never mind."

"But you know what, Sam? I'll kinda miss that Steven kid. That big dopey grin of his made me feel all kinds of warm and clam chowdery inside."

"That reminds me, aluminum-head, any residual damage from fusing with young Steven?"

"Nothing serious; except I feel gassy, remorseful about my mother, mournful about foods shaped like cats, and I might be retaining water."

"You'll notice all kinds of bizarre changes as you get older, little pal."

"Sam, you think we'll ever see Steven again?"

"I wouldn't doubt it. With how much his stories have come, I think it'll be harder to NOT see Steven ever again."

"Hey, you ever feel like we forgot something?" Max pondered.

Turns out they DID forget something. Back in Beach City, the polar bear they had in their trunk was resting on a beach chair near the shore, and the woman made of candy was reclining in the chair next to him. The candy woman leaned towards the bear's paw, making him feel uncomfortable.

"Ice Bear is not ready for commitment," the bear simply said, as he got out of the chair and strutted away.

"Oh well," Sam shrugged. "If it was important, we probably wouldn't have forgotten it."

"No, we probably still would've," Max smirked.

"True. But we'll worry about that later. We've got a new caper to take care of."

"Ooh! Goody! I wanna hassle those self-righteous Titans for making that 'your new favorite show' ad campaign!" Max grinned. "Everyone knows my new favorite show is 'Pirahna Factor.'"

"The new game show about the poor blockheads who try to spend an hour in a kiddie pool full of black piranhas for a thousand dollars, only to end up using the prize money for the medical expenses they'll surely need after the show?" Sam queried.

"It's the perfect combination of irony, pathos, and moral depravity, Sam! Who WOULDN'T wanna watch it!?" Max exclaimed.

"You crack me up, little buddy." Sam chuckled.

With that, the Freelance Police raced off through the black void of space, getting ready to crack the skulls of ne'er-do-wells once again. What would happen after this case? Who could say? All anyone knew was that no matter where they go, no matter who they meet, nothing is too strange a day for Sam & Max.