Falling Daisies

Chapter 7

I folded my feet under me onto the old blue chairs of the common room, cupping my hot chocolate to soak up its warmth. It was the end of the first week of October and glancing out the window I admired the trees, now displaying a beautiful array of colour, swaying in the wind, whistling their secrets to one another. I took a sip of my Chocolate, wincing as it scalded the roof of my mouth - why do they always make chocolate with the intention of inflicting this torturous pain?

I picked lazily at some foam poking out of the seat and sighed to myself, in that melancholy way I'd been doing everyday for the past nineteen days. Those nineteen perfects days. Well near enough...

The past two weeks with Ben played out in slow replay through my mind, allowing me to savour each delicious memory. We had made time to see each other everyday and each day we did something new and exciting. Day by beautiful day I felt myself open up to him like a butterfly emerging from its cocoon. I didn't tell him about the incident yet, or the horrible downhill spiral that followed, I wasn't ready for that, but I did tell him other stuff.  

Like my childhood dreams (to be a professional sticker collector), my most embarrassing moment (in primary school when I went up to get a certificate in assembly and I wet myself under the gaze of over a hundred eyes on me - I was six, don't judge me!) and my most recent dream, to go to the London University of Art and become a world famous designer (aim high right?).

"But there's a problem" I had told him, "I need to get at least a B in English for them to even seriously consider taking me."

"Well what's the problem with that?" He asked, biting down on a cheese toastie, his jaw strong as he chewed. God he even looked sexy eating! We had been sat in the alcove of a cafe, a quick pit stop from the rock climbing (this guy had some weird passions) we had just engaged in and he was grilling me about my future.

"Erm... I'm awful at it? I mean I enjoy it sure, but I just don't know what happens! My brain goes into shut down whenever I see an exam question and I freeze. I'm barely scraping Ds and the occasional C when I'm having a good day but I'm just struggling so much!"

"I can help you...?"

"What?"

"I can help you! I'll have you know I got an A for English when I did A level... Try and pretend at least that you're not shocked, you've wounded me!" He mockingly put his hands up to his heart and pretended to faint, losing his balance and nearly falling off the chair. I snorted with laughter! "But seriously," he said regaining himself, "if you want my help I'd be happy to give it.."

"Sure. I'd love that!"

And so it had started. After that conversation we worked on my English for at least an hour every day. Sometimes, most times, it bored me senseless but it was more time with Ben and that is what mattered to me. It was amazing to see him teach, he became so expressive and animated, like he had been the first time he'd shown me his secret wall art diary. He'd make a good teacher one day. He always got quiet when I asked about his future, muttering something about it being important to "live in the now."

There was something bugging me though, a voice in my head that wouldn't go away. What did I actually know about Ben? I knew he worked in a hardware store to help his parents pay the bills but quit quite recently, he loved dogs and it had taken him till Year eight to get to grasps with the seven times table (wow)... But what did I really know?

Like why had I never been to his house? This one I could sort of understand because he hadn't properly been to mine either, I wasn't prepared to unload that onto him just yet, but I knew nothing about his family either, they might be worse than mine... Ha. Good one, Luce.