Just An Ordinary Girl ~A Johnny Depp Story~

Smokes, Dates, Bras...

Despite mine and Keira's newly-found feminine pride after Al, the waitress at Starbucks, had shot us an approving smile when I had defeated Johnny at poker last night, the first visitor I had the next morning was not a woman but, in fact, Orlando.
"Hey," I smiled wearily, letting him in before glancing around my trailer, embarrassed. The floor was littered with the entire contents of my suitcase plus various things I'd picked up since I'd arrived here; garments, scripts and highlighter pens to help me learn my lines, hairbrushes and scrunchies and many other things I had simply dropped there carelessly. "Excuse the mess," I mumbled, picking up a few items of clothing out of the hundreds that were strewn across the room.
Orlando grinned amused, his arms folded across his chest as he observed the jumble of t-shirts stacked on my desk amongst the other areas that had fallen into disarray.
"You want help?" he asked knowingly, his brown eyes glinting slyly.
"Please!" I nodded gratefully, and he automatically knelt beside me, picking stuff up until half the floor was clear.
"Thanks so much, I would have never got through this by myself!" I called over my shoulder to him as I turned around to tuck the newly folded piles of clothes into drawers.

"That's okay, I don't...ah," he paused mid-sentence, causing me to turn around to shoot him a quizzical look. Instead I found him grinning as he held up something black in front of his face which he had unearthed from underneath the remaining clothes.
"Ooh, one of Alice's bras...and it's even got lace," he grinned mischievously, pinging one of the straps as I glowered at him, turning pink.
"Hand it over, Orlando," I said firmly, holding out my hand, but Orlando merely dangled it in front of me, still grinning widely as he read the label.
"Ooh, 32C...nice, Alice!" he laughed infuriatingly as I tried to snatch it from his hand repeatedly to no avail.
"Orlando," I said warningly, but he carried on clutching it teasingly.
"Fine! Keep it!" I snapped irritably, though I felt a little amused as he smirked, tucking it in his pocket and out of my reach, before heading into the bathroom. I shook my head in despair as he shut the door behind him, picking up the few remaining shirts and pairs of shorts and chucking them idly into the back of my wardrobe, before hearing another knock on my door.
"Your winnings from last night," Keira grinned at me as soon as I opened it, handing me the crisp notes from last night's game. "Johnny said you forgot to pick them up amidst the thrill of winning," she laughed as I took them from her gratefully. "Oh, and Johnny also said that he's sorry he couldn't deliver them to you himself, but he's...uh...busy right now," Keira rolled her eyes. I blinked at her.
"What's that look for?" I asked curiously. She shook her head before replying cryptically, "You'll see sometime, I guess."
I shrugged, and we both frowned suddenly as Orlando's voice rang out from inside the trailer and he emerged from the bathroom wearing, to my utter horror, my black bra stretched over his t-shirt and a wide grin.
"Hmm, does it suit me? Am I foxy?! Oh, it offers so much support!" he cried dramatically, striking a pose and clutching the empty cups before noticing Keira's stunned face poking around the door as she peered at her friend in apparent shock.
"Oh. Keira," he mumbled blankly, looking utterly shamefaced as he wriggled promptly out of the lingerie, dropping it to the floor, kicking it to one side and clearing his throat, trying to look dignified as me and Keira burst out into hysterics at his shameful display.
"Oh, God, I so need to get myself a camera," Keira moaned weakly after we'd calmed down.
Orlando glared at her sulkily.
"I've um...got...stuff to do. Please...forget that...and uh, don't tell...uh, don't tell Johnny, okay?" he mumbled uncertainly, his cheeks still fiery red, before heading out of my trailer and off towards his own, walking rigidly as though he had been stung. We watched him go, still grinning guiltily, until he vanished from sight and I turned back to Keira.
"Thanks for the delivery," I smiled, "I think I'll go and find Johnny though, and ask him why he isn't gentlemanly enough to do things himself instead of ordering poor innocent women around!" I smiled. "See you, Keira!"
She nodded at me casually, causing several strands of hair to fall loose from the position they were pinned up in, before heading towards her own trailer. Just as her door shut, Orlando poked his head out of his, clearly thinking we had both gone inside and the coast was now clear for him to leave. His face fell slightly as he saw me smiling across at him, but he made his way out nonetheless, faltering for a moment and not knowing where to look and what direction to go in.
"Orlando!" I called to him, suddenly feeling a rush of warmth for the goofy, if somewhat flirty, young man. He glanced up at me questioningly. "Let's take a walk. You can help me find Johnny!" I informed him, as he joined me at my side, immediately looking enthusiastic once more.
"I know where he'll be," Orlando walked slightly faster, gesturing for me to follow him. We headed up the hill and around the back of the set when suddenly Orlando stopped dead in front of me, looking at me oddly, before glancing behind his shoulder hastily as if suddenly remembering something. He shook his head slightly, before continuing walking. We headed around a corner and I let out an indignant gasp as my eyes fell on Johnny and five or so crew members laughing and puffing away on cigarettes, oblivious to mine and Orlando's presence. Orlando laughed at my appalled expression awkwardly.
"Sorry...I was kind of unsure whether you had a problem with smoking or not, but I figured it...wouldn't matter after all...?" he said questioningly, explaining why he had paused a few moments before leading me around here. He tugged on my arm, grinning bemusedly, as I stood firmly glaring at Johnny.
"Johnny!" I snapped at him, before striding towards the man who belonged to the name I'd just uttered, and repeated it loudly when he gave no response.
"Johnny!" I shrieked once more in disbelief. "Are you smoking?!" He whirled round, ripping the cigarette from his mouth in alarm and slipping it behind his back, wide-eyed and startled as I eyed him sternly. His expression was one of a teenage boy who had been caught red handed by his mother with a dirty magazine.
"Well...uh..." he began nervously, a stream of smoke curling and rising behind him, drifting over his shoulder and into my face.
"Are you?!" I demanded, outraged and coughing slightly.
"Um...yes, yes I am," he replied, shamefaced, putting the cigarette back to his mouth uselessly.
"Ol' Johnny's infamous for smokin' roun' dese parts," Orlando informed me jokily in a Western accent like he was from a Cowboy movie. Johnny shrugged at me innocently as I gazed at him with distaste.
"What do you even like about it?" I asked bemusedly.
"Well, I...I don't know!" he cried helplessly, trying to defend himself against my attack on his habits. "Anyway...Vanessa thinks it's...sexy," he mumbled, turning pink.
"Does she now?" I frowned disgustedly, as Orlando collapsed into laughter. "Give me that," I sighed, snatching the cigarette from him and taking a drag, wincing at the taste. "Is that sexy? Me killing myself?" I demanded, looking between the two men smugly, my point proven.
"Actually...it sorta...was..." Johnny grinned, as Orlando nodded enthusiastically in agreement.
"Oh," I blushed, stumped, particularly by Johnny's reaction as he eyed me up and down with an unfamiliar look in his eye, a small smile playing at his lips. "Well, I hope you enjoyed this," I said, waving it in front of his face, "Because it was your last one ever!" I told him determinedly, stamping on it and crushing it into the gravel below us. I turned away, grabbing Orlando by the sleeve and pulling him alone with me, but it wasn't long before I heard Johnny's footsteps and turned to see him at my side, jogging to keep up with my pace.
"Alice, can't I just smoke? You don't eat meat and I don't pressure you to eat it, so how come you get to pressure me not to smoke?" he whined.
"Johnny! They're a hundred percent different things! Not eating meat is good, smoking is bad," I retorted lamely.
"Does it really matter though Alice?" He asked, sounding bored, but I spotted the mournful look in his eyes as he gazed at his cigarette's crushed remains. I gazed coolly at him.
"Yes, it does matter! I hate...I hate smoking," I said firmly, crushing the cigarette even more viciously under my flip-flop.
"Well...maybe I hate some of the stuff you do!" Johnny retorted, much to the enjoyment of the other smokers who gave a dramatic whoop before chuckling at the unfolding scene before them. I blinked at him.
"Such as...?" I asked expectantly, watching him shuffle his feet awkwardly, his expression full of concentration as he considered my faults. Finally he glanced up at me, looking triumphant.
"Sometimes...you...you fiddle with your hair too much!" He smirked.
"That is kind of cute though," Orlando piped up, smiling at me.
"Mmm, it is very cute," Johnny nodded in agreement, before blushing as he realized he'd just completely contradicted himself. "Alright! You don't do anything annoying! You're perfect!" He cried, throwing his hands up in the air in despair. "Well, us mere mortals have flaws, Alice," he sighed, gesturing to Orlando, himself and his other assorted friends before taking another cigarette from the open pack that was poking out of his pocket. I promptly snatched it from his hand, feeling strange as my hand ran over his palm as I retracted it. Johnny's eyes flickered up at me for a split second before instinctively flitting over to Orlando, who was gazing out over the lake obliviously. I blushed under his deep piercing gaze before saying firmly, "Hand over your cigarettes. I do not want you getting ill from those...cancer-sticks!" I said dramatically, feeling fed up as I knew Orlando was smothering a laugh from beside of me. Johnny gazed at my open palm for a few seconds before slowly removing the packet from his jeans and pressing it there. I beamed happily and quickly rummaged in my pocket for a stick of gum.
"Right," I said brightly, presenting him with one. "From now on, when you feel like a cigarette, you resist, okay? And you chew gum!" I said. He shot me a patronizing look, before accepting it.
"And your lighter," I said calmly. He rolled his eyes in defeat, before handing it to me too. I glanced at it for a second, my fingers running over the smooth metal surface, then turning away from the men, hurled it with all of my strength into the lake, where it landed with an almost inaudible splash. Johnny gazed at me, stunned.
"I thought you were just going to confiscate it! Vanessa gave me that!" He cried indignantly.
All the more reason to throw it away, a voice whispered inside my head, and I willed myself not to grin as I imagined her face when she found out the little lighter was spending it's time with seaweed now, instead of the inside of her beloved boyfriend's pocket.
"Someday you'll thank me," I smiled. Orlando cocked his head and grinned across at me, looking admiring at my sheer stubbornness, and we turned and walked up the hill, back towards the trailers, leaving the crowd around Johnny guffawing at their friend's predicament.
I spotted the familiar gleam of the white trailers in the sun as we headed down the dusty path, chatting happily. There was a faint clashing of swords in the distance, due to Keira and Bill shooting yet another sword-fighting sequence. I reached my trailer and collapsed into a little deckchair I had sneakily pinched from the set earlier so I could soak up a little sun in my free time. Orlando closed his eyes for a split second before gazing at me determinedly.
"Alice, I hate grovelling...please can't we just date?" he asked, causing me to roll my eyes in annoyance.
"For the last time, no!" I grinned at him, trying to turn it into a joke so as not to hurt his feelings.
"Please? You're driving me crazy! I've liked a lot of women before...a lot! I mean, I actually thought I had women figured out, but you...you've completely baffled me! I've never had a woman act this way towards me...a woman who confuses me...and I kinda like it!" He grinned, his eyes sparkling lightheartedly though it had obviously been hard for him to just admit all of that.
"Well, it'd be a shame for me to ruin it for you then by accepting your offer," I grinned. He sighed exasperatedly.
"Ah...I don't know how I'll do it, Alice, but I will win you over eventually...somehow," he grinned charmingly, his dark eyes still glinting playfully. I raised my eyebrows sceptically, smiling despite myself at how persistent he was.
"I doubt it, sweetie," I said, reaching up and pinching his cheek fondly. He blushed, frowning at me, and turned away from my chair and began walking stiffly back towards Gore's hut, looking humiliated. I chuckled as I watched him go, taking my sunglasses out of my pocket and pressing them onto my nose so my eyes were sheltered from the scorching bright light, but then something caught my eye.
Johnny and Vanessa were walking towards me along the little pathway, their fingers intertwining, Vanessa gazing at Johnny lovingly, but he was glancing distractedly away from her at the sandy path as though in deep thought. He looked up suddenly, almost sensing my gaze, his eyes locking directly onto mine and his lips curved gently upwards in a sweet, genuine little smile. He nodded to Orlando who was heading towards them and then raised his free hand and gave me a jaunty little wave, attracting Vanessa's attention. She shot me an angry glare before grabbing Johnny's still waving hand and wrapping it around her waist so now she was holding both, walking awkwardly due to the stupid position of their arms. Still, she managed to turn her head and shoot me a smug little smirk from over her shoulder. I frowned, sliding my glasses down the bridge of my nose to check that I wasn't just imagining all of this, but I was right. She was still sneering away.
What's her problem? It's almost like she's trying to make me...jealous? Of what though? I sighed to myself, running my fingers through my hair in thought. Of the fact that she's with Johnny? Why would that matter to me? I mused, feeling an unexplainable sudden rush of anger and hurt.
It wouldn't bother me at all! How dare she?!
Don't do anything rash...
Though...two can play that game...!
Just don't do anything rash...
"Orlando!" I cried suddenly, watching him stop in his tracks, whirl around and shoot me a quizzical look, just as both Johnny and Vanessa were doing too, just as curious as him about what I had to say.
"I've...I've changed my mind!" I smiled, getting up and rushing over to him as he gazed at me in confusion. "I was stupid before. Of course I want to be your girlfriend," I beamed at him, feeling ashamed at my extravagant display but somehow carrying on anyway. Orlando's face broke into a wide smile, revealing his pearly white teeth.
"Couldn't resist the old 'Bloom Charm', huh?" He smirked.
"Oh...something like that," I replied, placing my hand on his arm. He grinned and then planted a swift kiss on my cheek.
"Okay...wait here, I'll just go shower and then I'm taking you out!" He said and then hurried off. I beamed after him, waving coyly, and then couldn't resist shooting a stunned Johnny and Vanessa a fleeting smile, which neither returned, before hurrying into my trailer and closing the door behind me.
That wasn't too rash...was it?