text me back >> joshler

twenty one - pilots

i'm not even sorry

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i woke up the next morning, opening my eyes only to be blinded by the migraine in my head. i wish i could kill my mind right now, just to stay alive for a while. a few tears escape my eyes as i sit there and stare at my ceiling.

i wipe them away though. get out of bed and start my day. i walk over to the mirror by my door and lift my shirt off carefully, aware of how much pain ill cause myself if i rip my shirt off fast. the bruises everywhere look just as painful as yesterday, maybe even worse. i don't take have much time to make my bruises look just right. oh well. i sling my bag over my shoulder and wince once it hits my back.

i pull my phone off of my charger and turn on the screen, only to be met with over a hundred notifications. literally.

josh: where are you?

josh: i'm in drama class but you aren't here.

josh: did you ditch?

josh: tyler, where are you?

99+ more text messages

i sigh and slide my phone into my back pocket, grabbing my head phones and shoving them in along with it.

it's going to be a long day.

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i feel josh's eyes on my from across the room. it's currently the monthly reverse day, just my luck right? this means i have my last two classes first. my last two classes are with josh, how could i forget this?

he must be so worried about me, guessing from all those texts. i just hope he doesn't figure out what happened, probably having already heard about jake's return. cringing, i turn back to the teacher's insistent rambling about the importance of show biz.

why did i take drama again?

oh, thats right; jensen ackles. man, he's a good actor. him and jared though. hotties.

not as hot as josh.

i look over my shoulder to see him looking back at me. his eyes glimmer with hope, and sadness, and confusion as i look back. as if asking me, what happened? i shake my head and face the front again, not looking back again for the rest of class.

i'm lucky i came late to school and missed most of first period and am now close to the end of second. or sixth period? i don't know, this whole reverse day confuses me every month.

eventually, this class ends and i jump out of my seat, racing to the door and out before josh can follow me. i rush to the abandoned bathrooms at the back of the school. no one ever goes in there, a bunch of rumors were started about it being haunted and a whole bunch of other bullshit so no one even comes to this part of the school anymore.

i rush inside and grab onto the sink, trying my best to breathe after all that walking. josh was probably looking for me. josh was probably worried about me. josh was probably lost. josh was probably confused.

sighing, i feel a tear fall down my cheek. i look up at my stupid face to see my eyes red and watery. i hear the bell ring and sigh in relief, knowing josh is probably in class. how could i do this to josh? worry him so much? why can't i just tell him? it's not like he'll do any thing.

you said that last time tyler, and your boyfriend was suspended for three days. smh @ u.

yeah, yeah. maybe he won't fight jake this time though, maybe he'll just let it happen and go on and maybe we can just run away and not get beat up and bullied.

no, thats stupid and could probs never happen. but it'd be nice though. we could have a kid. what would we name them though? caspar? caspar sounds pretty.

wait what the fuck? i hate children and i'm contemplating having one with this guy? jesus christ, who am i?

just as those thoughts wrack my brain i hear footsteps running down the hall, growing louder and louder. who the fuck would be running down the hall right now? shouldn't you be learning kid?

i laugh at my own thoughts only to see josh run into the bathroom, panting and smiling, wide as fuck when he sees me stood there. my mouth opens and closes like a fish as i try to think of something to say, some sort of excuse.

but he just walks up to me and kisses me, grabbing my face and pulling it to him and smashing his lips against mine, softly. like telling me, i missed you so
much. my hands shake as i reach up to cradle his face too. his hands slide behind my back and pull me closer and i feel a pain shoot through the spot he's touching. i curse my self a thousand times as i wince and he removes his lips from mine with a confused look.

"you okay? what happened yesterday? I texted you, was your phone off? whats wrong? tyler?" my breathing had escalated. too many questions. too many questions. i feel my hands shake as i take a step back and look at the ground, willing my lungs to work and for my breathing to calm. i hear josh's mumbled words but at the same time i don't.

next thing i know, i'm passed out and all i see is black.

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"tyler? you awake yet, babe?" i hear a familiar voice, just as i start to open my eyes. i recognize it as josh's voice and look up at him. he's staring down at me with such a worried expression, i just sigh.

"sorry, yeah i'm awake." i reply in a groggy voice.

"what are you apologizing for? not replying to my texts or not telling me about those bruises on you?" he raises an eyebrow and i curse him mentally for being such a smart ass.

"listen, i was going to tell you, i just-"

"you just what, tyler?" josh looked mad now. i sighed and sat up, wincing.

"well, if you wouldn't interrupt; i just didn't want you to get all mad and freak out. it was seriously just nothing, the bruises will go away soon." i explained. he let out a breath and closed his eyes, trying to stay calm. probably for my sake.

"tyler, how the hell did they get there?" he pushed. i looked away, no way i could tell him without him wanting to tear up the town. i felt his fingers on my jaw, bringing my face back to looking at him.

"nothing, babe, i just fell.."

"don't you dare pull the 'i just fell' card on me tyler, your house doesn't even have that many stairs and neither does the school."

"well maybe, i just fell really hard.."

"well maybe, you need to tell me the fucking truth."

"josh, i-"

"tyler."

i looked up at him to see his eyes filled with sadness. he was always so worried about me. how could someone with a heart like his ever love a heart like mine? maybe i should just quit the shit, and tell him.
sigh sigh sigh.

"i got beat up.. by jake."

slam.

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well this was fun, right kids?

this update came fast i was not expecting to finish this tonight you better be appreciative you lil hoes.

just kidding none of you are hoes. you are all my children. i love u. stay safe and don't let jake beat ur ass.

seeya!