In A Relationship With Lu Han

X: F those, F it

ERRORS AHEAD

Minx (n.) - a sexually attractive and playful woman who often causes trouble. (Merriam-Webster)

#IARWLH
---

I clicked my camera's shutter to capture the name of the resort. Lost Paradise was written on an arc located at the entrance, few meters away from the hotel.

I walked towards the beach, my feet kissed the black sand and it amazed me how beautiful it could be. Dark but still beautiful, like my love to him. Dangerous but real and sincere.

I captured pictures of the landscape, the cliff on the other side of the resort is spectacular.

I strutted along the shore, showing off my black bikini (still one size smaller) and my slightly sun kissed skin. I let out a sweet yet seductive smile everytime I see a guy gaping at me.

The sun is currently setting and I chose to take pictures around this time for a better background and a dramatic atmosphere.

Lu Han is nowhere to be found, and I don't want to find him either. He pushed me off him earlier when I told him that I can be his other woman and I felt so wronged I walked away. He didn't have to push me, I can get off him on my own. I know when I'm wanted and I know when I'm not.

I noticed a bar from a distance but it's still closed, maybe because it's too early for night parties. I glance at my at phone to check the time, 6:48 PM. Ah, I still have the time to lurk around the resort.

I stepped closer to the shore and sat there, staring at the calm, blue green sea in front of me. Then I remember, the ocean can send tsunamis. It's funny how something so calm can be something so disastrous, just like me.

Who would've known that a little girl before plans to ruin someone else's relationship and life when she grew up? Heol, I never wanted to be someone like that. I've always hated the mistresses in all the movies and stories that I've seem and read, but I turned out wanting to be one.

"What are you thinking?"

I looked behind me and saw Lu Han approaching me. What is he doing here? I thought he'll avoid me until our flight tomorrow? I removed my eyes from and stared at the view in front of me again, noticed that it's been an hour since I sat here, "I have a lot to think of." And you're on top of the list.

I'm reassessing myself. I'm thinking if I should really continue doing whatever I intend to do. I am asking if myself if you're worth the trouble. I'm asking myself if it's still worth it to lose my dignity and my pride just to get you. Those words were what I wanted to tell him, but none of them have left my mouth. Maybe because I don't want him to know that I'm still the old Yixia who's scared to shout at him or even defend myself against all his harsh words.

I played the black sand on my feet with my fingers, "Do you... hate me still?"

I didn't have the courage to look at him, afraid to still see the fire burning in his eyes. I waited for him to respond.

"No, I don't think so."

It felt like one small thorn among the million of thorns that's pricking on my heart has been removed but a big rock replaced it. My chest tightened as I slowly turn to look at him, "T-Then why are you treating me like this?"