Cowboy Take Me Away

Screw Feelings

"Ever since that night I always had trouble talking to guys, or being comfortable, or not trying to think of those nights. If a boy would ever get too close to me, I would flinch or even close my eyes. In Bismarck, I tried to go out with a lot of guys to see if I could handle it better. Some went well and others went bad. With the some that went well, I would get them to make out with me. Everything would go okay, until they would slip their hand under my shirt, and then I would have a flashback.. Sometimes even bare skin contact sent me back to that night.. But lately there has been a few times I wouldn't think, I would feel something different. Those times have been with Cooper. His fingers have brushed against mine, he has grabbed my arm once, and one time he accidentally put his hand on my thigh. Cooper always gave me these huge butterflies in my stomach when I was talking to him, or even if I just saw him. I never had these feelings before and they were hella confusing to me. I haven't seen Cooper in about four days, and the weird thing is that I think I actually miss him walking into the diner. I guess he didn't feel the same as I did for him, figures.."  I wrote in my diary and then closed the book and shoved it back under the cushion of my chair. 

It's been a normal week for me: work at diner, online school, chores, and try to busy myself. On Tuesday I started working with my mom again at the Vet Clinic again. My mom owned the Vet Clinic and I used to go on calls with her all the time. I was a very quick learner and I would keep notes in my notebook I would bring with. 

Seeing how my mom would treat and care for the animals inspired me to be just like my mom, a veterinarian. I loved working with animals and treating the unusual animals, like llamas. 

Today and tomorrow were going to awesome! It was the first day of the Hudson Rodeo! My dad had managed to get me entered for barrels and team roping. I would be teaming roping with Taylor, who was the header and I was the heeler. Taylor also did barrels, she had a great quarter horse. Caleb would be bare backing, and Ashley would be worrying from the stands. Broncs weren't near as nerve wrecking as bulls. I didn't know if my dad would be competing today or tomorrow. 

When my dad was younger he did every event, except bulls and barrels. His best event was broncs and then it was bull dogging. My dad was one of the best. 

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As I got out of my truck I looked at myself in my extension mirror of the Dodge 3500 dually. I straightened out my black felt cowboy hat and looked at my big curls, I was satisfied. I had some dark blue jeans on and a white barrel racing shirt on, I had one of my gold belt buckles on, and some buckskin Ariat square-toed boots on. 

I went back to our trailer and opened it and there stood my beautiful Pharaoh, "Hey boy." I smiled at him and scratched his head. I walked over to the other side and grabbed his saddle blanket and his saddle. 

I looked at Pharaoh's customized breast collar and ran my fingers over it. It was hand carved leather with turquoise and white and gold studded diamonds. I was only getting ready now because I had to sing the national anthem. 

I was extremely nervous to sing, even though I had done it a number of times. I loved doing it though because I loved holding the Flag and then having Pharaoh ride along the gates of the arena was the best feeling in the world. Along with the crowd's cheers and yells.

I had Pharaoh's reins in my right hand and started walking him to the back gates of the arena. I watched the bleachers start to fill up and my heart started racing a bit, but I had done this plenty of times, why was I so nervous today? "Hey DaKota!" I heard a voice from behind me, I turned my head and saw Mason jogging towards me. 

"Oh boy." I mumbled to myself and waited for him to get to my side. "Hey Mason, what are you doing here?" I say to him, and he lets out a breath from just jogging.