Just My Random Junk~

Baaaaaaack

So I'm finally home again, and to be honest, I really hate it. I felt so happy and exuberant at camp. Being away from my parents made me feel alive.

Now that I'm home again, I already feel like I've hit rock bottom. And, like my camp leaders told me, I can only go up from here. But I honestly don't think so. I think the bottom of this pit I'm in is covered in oil. You know, so it's literally impossible to climb back up?

Yeaaaaaaaah!

I accidentally made one of my leaders cry when I told them my "story". You know, my past. But heck, it's hardly anything. Compared to other people, my life has been a breeze.

But just me making someone cry because they now know I hate being alone...ehhhh I kinda feel bad.

I mean, most everyone who has read Loner (my Ichimatsu fanfiction) KNOWS how alone I feel half the time. I use Ichimatsu to vent a loooot of stuff.

SO, IN OTHER WORDS...

Camp was great.
I feel like crap now
People told me they had faith that my dreams would come true in the future.
And now I feel  stressed and depressed.

Yay me.

Sometimes, do you ever just feel like, you know, people expect too much from you? Despite the fact that I'm a jerk, people think I'm smart. So they usually turn to me for an answer. Sometimes I myself DO NOT know that answer. And when I don't, I feel like I disappointed someone.

Psssssssssh

I want to go back to camp.

I don't care if I got terrible sunburns from being outside my dorm by force. I just want to be away from everyone in my family. I want to stay around the people who cared for me. I don't want to be depressed again, but I can already tell I am.

On the bus ride home last night, a song started to play on my iPod that really reminded me of my past. (Drifting by Plumb)

My sister was on the bus too, fast asleep. Her head was leaning on her friend's shoulder, and he was just petting her head. (I ship it so hard).

But that song, heh...I accidentally let it get to me. XD

I felt like I was about to cry, and a tear DID run down my cheek. JUST A SINGLE ONE.

Then one of my leaders asked me if I was okay.

And they just talked to me. And talked. And talked.

For once, this week, I actually felt like my lonely existence on this earth matters to someone.

That's all I'm gonna say for now. This venting is probably irritating the few people who read this.

So, goodbye, my friends.

And, if you ever want to talk about anything, just message me on here.

There's no need to feel or be alone. Cause someone out there really does care about you. Like meeeeeeeee! :D