A Rush of Blood to the Head

Chapter 3

"MY GOD YOU KNOW EVERYTHING!!!", Chris said gleefully. "YOU CAN EVEN READ MY THOUGHTS!!"

"Of course I can, you twat!", the woman chuckled, "I am your mind after all."

But this is so impossible, Chris thought.

"Of course it is impossible", the woman said and they both burst out laughing.

"Do you remember everything about me, for instance, even things that I have....like...forgotten?", Chris asked.

"Actually, yes."

"I don't believe you"

"Would you like me to read out a memory of yours from your childhood that you probably don't remember now?", the woman asked.

"Yeah.", Chris stretched himself. "Go on"

"You remember that time when you accidentally had your...well...manhood caught in the zipper when you were eight.", the woman paused, "And when you tried to free it, you ended up....sigh.... need I say more?"

Chris looked at the woman in awe, "No...It's okay, but how the hell..... I had forgotten that. It was so embarrassing"

"I am a store house of memory, YOUR memory", the woman replied.

Chris smiled.

"So what do I call you?"

"Anything you want, I am your creation lad.", the woman's eyes gleamed.

"Let's see. If you were a guy I would have named you Mark, but since you are female, I would name you...", Chris pondered.

"Max", the woman said.

Chris jumped, "THAT WAS EXACTLY WHAT I WAS GONNA SAY", he paused, "Max...yes..Max"

"Haha, Calm down lad", the woman laughed.

Chris went on smiling. But then the woman's gleaming eyes reminded him of Jonny. He got lost in his own thoughts.

Max saw that. She said, "I know Chris, I know you are sad."

Chris looked up. A tear rolled down his face. One could see the pain in his stunning blue eyes.

"What do you think, will Jonny...will Jonny ever forgive me?", Chris sobbed.

"I don't know. I wish I did.", she said sincerely.

"I miss Jonny." Chris burst into tears. 

"There, there lad", Max got up and sat on the couch beside him.

Surprisingly enough Chris could almost feel her hand stroking his back. She felt so real.

"I feel so bad", he said between sobs, "I hurt Jonny so much, It's all my fault"

"We don't know it yet, do we? We have no idea what happened to him.", she said.

Chris didn't answer.

"Besides, he was drunk. He could have done a million other stupid things to you.", Max paused, "Don't worry. You will learn to deal with it."

"How do you even know?", Chris asked.

Max smiled. "Because I am you Chris. I am you."

For the first time in days Chris felt hopeful. Everything wasn't so bad anymore. Yeah, maybe Jonny was indeed very drunk. Maybe that's why he acted so violent. Maybe it will all be okay. But he still felt like crap. His heart had been torn apart. How could Jonny do this to him? He had absolutely adored Jonny for his calm and composed demeanour. Thus he felt at sea when he recollected the events on the night at Christmas eve. Jonny must have been pretty mad at him to have done that. He felt like he had jeopardised the band's future. That too in the middle of promoting their seventh  studio album. The pain increased.

"It's okay. Don't worry.... And what if it doesn't work out? What if your band breaks apart? What if Jonny boy leaves you? You will be left with a tremendous void in your life but hey... it won't be the end of the world. You still will have two of the most beautiful kids on earth and also... a loving family. You will learn to cope with it. And if Jonny leaves you for a petty reason like this, he never deserved your friendship anyways." Max said.

"NO...Don't say that!", Chris cried.

"Hey, I know Jonny. He will never leave you. He is like the nicest guy on earth.", Max paused, "It's the truth Chris, every time you fall in love with somebody, you will end up getting hurt. But that will only make you stronger. Trust me you will emerge much much stronger, out of this situation"

Chris sobbed, "I want to deal with it, but it is so fucking hard!!"

"Shh...You know you can get through this"

Chris remained silent.

"Give it some time.", Max said.

"I will", Chris replied.

Both of them sat in silence for a while.

"You should sleep now, lad. You had a long long day." Max said.

"I know. I will try." Chris said while getting up.

He went to the bathroom. Jeez. Was that his own reflection he was looking at? That ghost with the messy hair and blood red eyes? Yes it was.

"Congratulations, Jonny boy", He murmured, "You succesfully transformed me into a ghost."

He went to his bedroom. Max was sitting on his bed.

"You do look like a ghost. Maybe a fusion between a ghost and a monster. A Ghonster!", Max chuckled.

Chris smiled. "Yeah, right. Move over."

He got into the bed and pulled the blanket up. It was chilly that night. He looked at his watch. It was 3:00 am. 

"Sweet dreams, lad. Hope you have a good night's sleep", Max said.

Chris smiled and turned off the lights. He closed his eyes. He recalled Jonny's face.

The guitarist's stunning green eyes, his stubble, his messy hair, and that goddamned hat he always wore...All of this made Chris smile. He remembered how handsome Jonny looked when he played his guitar, when he was engrossed in making music. His heart burst with love on imagining Jonny's shy but heartfelt smile. He wouldn't deny it anymore. He had fallen in love with Jonny.

Chris felt a pang in his chest when he realised his feelings would never be reciprocated. But he didn't mind. As long as his Jonny boy was happy, he would be happy. He wanted nothing else.

"God, please fix this. Please. I never wanted to hurt him. I love him so much.", Chris prayed in a barely inaudible voice.

"Please God, I want nothing else, please. Keep Jonny happy", with a final prayer Chris slowly drifted off to sleep, hoping for a better tomorrow.