In My Wildest Dreams

Year 5: Looking For You

**Im gonna try to put in more events from the actual story like Dolores, Dumbledore's Army, and going to the ministry. I'm working on sliding all those into this so keep with me. Enjoy!

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I had been trying to avoid Neville at all costs. I know it's harsh after what happened but that's the whole reason I have to do it. After I kissed Neville I, changed, I guess you could say. I can't get him out of my head. Even Draco has noticed something different. If I'm not careful I could put Neville in serious danger. To be honest Umbridge, who is now pretty much running the school, has made it a little easier with all her stupid rules. Draco joined her little squad for reasons unknown but I'd guess it's because he likes getting people in trouble. He likes to have some kind of power and authority. That pretty much takes up most of his time. Professor Snape had to make us work alone since girls and boys can't be within a certain amount of inches. He sat boys on one side and girls on the other. Same thing in Herbology so I don't have to worry about talking to Neville in class. Although, he still tries to catch me leaving class and in the corridors.

I've heard rumors of a group of students practicing defensive spells. I wish I could learn the truth. I in no way wish to get them in trouble like Draco. I'd actually like to join them but with me being a Slytherin I doubt that would ever happen. Maybe if I spoke to Neville I could find something out. He is a part of the good guys after all.

I made my decision. I walked through the corridors waiting and hoping I'd run into Neville. He has to be around here some where. The tower. I turned on my heels and made my way up to the last place I spoke to him. I slowly went up the stairs. I stopped right in the entrance to see Neville leaning against the railing looking out at the view. "Knock knock" I said softly as I leaned against the doorway. Neville turned to face me with a shocked expression. "Do you mind if I join you?" I asked fidgeting with my fingers. "Not at all" he was still facing me as I walked over to him.

"What brings you up here?" I asked as I leaned against the railing beside him. "I've found myself up here a lot recently. Just to think or clear my head." Neville stared at the castle around us. "What about you?" He asked glancing over at me. "Looking for you" I said matter of factly but not looking at him. When he didn't say anything I turned to face him completely. "Why were you looking for me? You've been avoiding me for days." When he said that I hurt more than I had since I started avoiding him. I couldn't look him in the eyes. "I'm sorry, I thought it would be for the best. I can't risk putting you in danger." I was looking down at my feet completely unable to meet his eyes.

I felt his fingers under my chin. They pushed upwards gently. I looked up to meet his eyes. "I put myself in danger with a lot of things I'm doing right now but that doesn't stop me."  His voice and eyes were so soft towards me I couldn't stand it. I broke down into sobs. His arms were around me immediately pulling me closer to him. I clutched his shirt and cried uncontrollably. "I'm sorry Neville. Everything in my life is just so complicated. If I were to have what I want then it would easily be destroyed and I would be left as an empty shell." I sobbed as I clutched him tighter. "What do you want?" When he asked that I stopped crying. I don't know why but I did. I stepped away and wiped the tears from my face. "You" I whispered when my eyes met his again.

In a blink of an eye he was kissing me. The feeling of it was so indescribable. I never felt so good and safe in my life. I wanted him. I wanted nothing more than to be like this with him every chance I had. If only it was that easy. "You have to fight for what you want Abby. It won't just fall into your lap." I opened my eyes to see him watching me with shining eyes. "How am I suppose to fight my family and the Malfoys? I can barely pass a Herbology exam." I laughed trying to make light of the situation. Neville didn't answer me this time. He grabbed my hand and pulled me behind him back to the school.

We went through corridor after corridor until he finally stopped and faced a wall. "What are we doing here?" I asked completely oblivious. I heard a soft rumbling noise and turned to see the wall creating a door right in front of me. "What the bloody hell is that?" I asked in complete astonishment. The door opened and I followed Neville inside. There was a group of students standing around with three in the middle. Harry, Ron, and Hermione were the first to notice us. I turned around to see the door had become a wall. "What is she doing here?" One of the students asked. They seemed horrified to see me standing in the same room with them.

"She is good and trustworthy. She wants to help and learn to fight." Neville spoke for me. I smiled at him and thanked him in my head. "Can she be trusted Neville? Truly trusted? She is a Slytherin after all." Ron was the one to speak up this time. "Don't forget her father is a death eater." Another voice said. "Plus she is dating Draco." Said another voice. I stepped back from the group. I was hurt by their accusations. They didn't know me. "That's enough everyone." Harry spoke up finally. He walked over to me and gave me his hand. "We haven't been formally introduced. I'm Harry." He said with a smile. I shook his hand with a small smile and replied, "I'm Abby."

I was being taught how to fight by Harry Potter himself. This was a glorious day for me. Despite what my family and Draco's family said about him I liked him. I looked up to him. I counted on him. Neville stood at my side the whole time to make sure no one tried anything towards me. I couldn't have been more happy to be here. That was until the room started shaking. Everyone immediately stopped and stared at the wall behind us. The rumbling continued. Harry and the young boy named Nigel stepped closer to look through a small hole that had opened when the rumbling started. All of a sudden they ran back and the wall exploded. I stepped back behind Neville trying to hide. I knew who would be on the other side of that smoke.

Sure enough it was Umbridge and her squad. The only one I didn't see was Draco. As if on cue he appeared from the side holding a girl in Ravenclaw robes. "Cho" I heard someone next to me whisper. She must of been part of this group too. I clutched the back of Neville's shirt trying my best to hide from Draco's sight. As if Neville knew what I was doing he positioned himself so I was unseen. He stood before me like a body guard and I felt my heart flutter at the thought. As the room emptied I knew I'd be seen so I took in a deep breath and stepped to the side. "Abby?" I heard Draco question harshly. I didn't dare meet his eyes. I'll be honest, I was actually scared of him in that moment. My fear only got worse from there.