I'm gonna try to make this chapter super duper loonggggg (:
uh so I actually was taking a break I wasn't writing that's why I didn't update in so long
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KENDALL'S POV
as soon as Chaz told Justin my heart stopped what if he doesn't help me, what if he hates me even more.
"Fuck man" he cursed under his breath I looked up wiping away my salty tears, he kicked the stairs railing, pulling his hair in frustration
"Well are you gonna get a abortion?" he says in a 'duh' tone
"Are you fucking kidding me Justin? this poor baby did nothing to you, if anything you don't fucking have to take care of the baby or even be in it's life I can take care of it on my own" I shouted, I ran outside, then slowed down walking on the side walk
I found the park that always has helped me, I sat on a swing I could hear my name being shouted the voice coming closer I ignored it letting a tear slip
"Kendall it's getting late do you want me to bring you home" I turned to see Chaz
I nodded getting up then walking with Chaz to his car
"I'm sorry the way he reacted he can be a douche" he chuckled under his breath
"It's okay" I stared out the window seeing the familiar houses go by we stop at my house, we say our goodbyes
I walk up to the door step, it's open but nobodies home
I go into my bathroom and turn to see if my belly has gotten bigger, I know that sounds silly for only being 3 days pregnant but I hate my weight I haven't ate in 2 days which isn't good for the baby I'm gonna have to start eating so it does have a chance at living, if it died I probably wouldn't be able to live with myself
I step onto my scale, I'm terrified to see my weight each time I do this
100 pounds it's pretty good considering I was 109 I sigh and walk down stairs, I decide to just eat a banana
God school tomorrow is gonna be horrid
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I put away my curling iron, I tried a new look today, I put on some skinny jeans, a lace top, vans, that's all the same but I curled my hair and put a bit more makeup on
I looked in the mirror for approval I shrugged walking down stairs, I strapped on my light blue backpack, I placed my phone in my back pocket
*beep* *beep*
I grabbed a granola bar, then rushed outside to Selena's car
"Hey Ken I like your make up" she smirked wiggling your eyebrows weirdly
"Haha thanks" I wanna tell Sel but what if she judges me. I don't wanna lose her, but she has to know sooner or later
"Uh Sel" I muttered
"Yea?" she hummed
"I-I'm pregnant" I closed my eyes waiting for a reply, it was silent
"Nice joke" she giggled
"I'm serious Sel" I looked her in the eyes, but hers were focused on the rode
"awh I'm happy for you I mean yea it's a little unexpected but as long as you're happy I'm happy" she smiled at me, I feel accomplished, she doesn't hate me
"One question though" she said
I nodded telling her to ask
"Who's the father?"
"You won't believe me, Justin Bieber" I sighed
I looked she was in shock
"What- how-"
"At that dumb ass party you guys made me go to but I don't care at least I will have someone in my life that will love me as much as I love them" I smiled to myself at that thought
"I'm proud of how you handled it Kendall, have you told Justin?" she asked as we pulled into a parking space in front of the school
"Actually yes it didn't go to well he asked for a abortion I screamed, and ran out" I shrugged as we got out the car
She nodded obviously not wanting to talk about it anymore so nobody eavesdrops
"We're here 10 minutes early lets find Chaz and Ryan" Selena suggests, she links onto my arm guiding me to our regular spot we meet up
When we spot them I fumble with my fingers not making eye contact
"If you want we don't have to go to them" she whispers into my ear
"It's fine" I mumbled, Selena stood between me and Justin, Ryan stood next to me, and Chaz was In between Justin and Ryan
This is basically the first time in weeks I'm planing on staying at school a full day instead if skipping, I usually make it to lunch then leave because of Justin.
I hear a squeaky voice I look up to see Taylor Kingston, wrapping her scrawny arms around his waist, she kissed him on the cheek that's it I'm done with bitches like him
Chaz and Selena stare at me to see my reaction, Ryan is just full on confused, Justin he looks I don't really know is that a sympathetic look?
"Come on Sel" I tug on her arm pulling her to the bathroom with me, I let a few tears slip, I cry into sels chest
"Fuck him he's a bitch okay Ken who cares if there is no one to take care of the baby, me, Chaz, and Ryan will always be more help then him" she says, I stop crying wiping the tears I nod at her slightly smiling, I fix my make up I walk out with Selena next to me Justin is still there but Taylor must have left, Taylor is nice and all but sometimes she can be a bitch it's complicated
"Kendall can I talk to you?" I look up to see Justin beaming at me everyone stares in shock, Ryan just looks confused again I nod, Justin pulls me aside while they watch
"Uh so what happened yesterday I-I'm sorry" he mutters looking down at his fingers, tears brush my eyes but I blink them away, I can't believe I'm in this situation out of all people Justin Bieber I mean he's fucked many girls so it shouldn't be a surprise that he got me pregnant
"Why are you sorry, you've fucked many girls so whys it a surprise? If you don't want it then don't be in it's fucking life it's that simply" I rolled my eyes, I turned on my heel to walk away, I felt something brush against my wrist tugging me, turning me back around
"I want to be in it's life I don't wanna be like my father, but just because I will be there for the child doesn't fucking mean we are together" he huffs
"Did I say that we were? no so don't assume things" I'm relieved he will be in it's life but part of me wants him to hold me tell me it's okay, take care of me but that won't happen because he's an asshole
There was awkward silence, soon enough the bell rings I walk away from him to Chaz, to be honest Chaz, besides Selena, has been about the only person I can't trust, tell everything to, that's why we are friends.
"What happened" he looks concerned
"He said that he will be in the babies life, but it doesn't mean we are together, then yea I don't know Chaz he's an asshole" I whined clinging onto Chaz like a five year old- man I wish I was five again.
"I'm sorry Ken he's just gonna have to deal with it" I nod agreeing with him walking to Science along with Sel and Ry talking behind us, and of course with Justin
I sit at our table of course Justin sits with us he's Chaz and Ryan's best friend I sit between Sel and Chaz at our circular table
I really hate my life why couldn't Justin be nice to me, be concerned, care for me
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((2 months later))
"You've gotten fatter" my 'mom' teases as I walk the stairs I ignore her as I shut the door to my room
I just got back from taking a walk, I heard the baby comes out healthier if you're more active so sometimes to clear my mind I take walks tomorrow is Monday which I'm dreading
Justin and I haven't talked or made eye contact which is fine with me
I have gotten a little bigger on my stomach I'm very self conscious like before but now it's worse, but that's life I don't know what I'm gonna do when I have a huge watermelon you call stomach people are gonna think I'm a whore, slut, skank, they would have more things to tease me about. Maybe just take online classes from home
I told Ryan everything, he was shocked but he told me that he will always be there to help me that's why I love him
I get off my bed, I decided to take a quick shower, finish last minute homework, then call it a night
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*beep* *beep*
My eyes raise, I shield the sun with my arms
I scan my closet I decide to wear something I won't be able to fit in once I get bigger
I choose a floral print laced top, some tight skinny jeans and some vans I place it on my bed with some undergarments
Once I get done showering I dress
I brush my teeth and hair, I decide to do some light curls, with more make up than usual but not like a Barbie.
Once I get downstairs nobodies home which is a relief, I grab a bagel, I smear a bit of butter on it, then chomp it down with a glass of orange juice
I take a glimpse across the street crap Justin.
He's my neighbor, and so is Chaz he lives next door that's how we met until Justin turned against me.
"YO KENDALL" i hear him shout from across the street
Justin in 8th grade was my best friend before Chaz, Ryan, and Selena. He knew about my mom, how my dad left, what my mom does to me, Then Taylor came in 9th grade he turned against me he's made me do things I regret like cutting, he doesn't even know about how I use to but I gave up.
I roll my eyes, then turn and raise a eyebrow at him, he waved his hand telling me to come here
"What do you want Justin" I frown
"I-I was just wondering if you told your family you know about it" he seems almost nervous I would laugh in his face but I'm too tired
"Why would I? You remember my mother, I don't have a father nobody gives a shit about me" I cross my arms
He looks shocked, like he almost forgot what the fuck is wrong with him
"O-oh I just uh I want to tell my mom so uh she won't freak out on me I want you to come so she won't scream as much" he sighs
"Okay? Is that all?"
He nods dismissing me, I walk on the sidewalk, I didn't ask them to drive me to school because I really don't feel like hanging with friends, I've been thinking about Justin non stop it's been getting me more depressed than I should be
I hear a horn next to me, I ignore him, I pretend to text on my phone
"Yo Hanson need a ride?" He calls out
"No thank you" I do wanna go in but I don't wanna argue then get kicked out then just end up walking again
"Get in or I will carry you in" he threats
I smile to myself, I stand where I am and cross my arms I stick my tongue out and don't move
I hear the door open, and he grabs me by my waist "Justin let me go" I giggle he ignores me by opening the passenger door flinging me in, I would get out but I'm out of breath, he smirks as he gets in the car what's wrong with him mood swings?
I really don't plan to stay at school all day people are just gonna say I've gotten fatter I really don't wanna go at all.
"Justin?" I squeak
"Yea" his eyes are darted on the road
"Uh when you get a girl friend, and the baby is born will you still be there for the baby" I know it came out of no where but he could change.
He parks his car at our school, then stares into my eyes
"Of course not I will always be there for you" he says softly
I nod not wanting to get emotional.
"What about you when you get a boyfriend will you allow me to see it" he questions
"of course but I doubt I will get a boyfriend have you seen me" I chuckle lightly
"Kendall don't out yourself down you're beautiful any guy would be l-lucky to have you" I'm utterly surprised by his words
"Thank you see you later or after school like you said do you want me to just go to your house after school?" I ask
"Yea I can drive you" he smirks as we walk to class I like this side of him
He stiffens as we walk inside most state and whisper at us talking obviously Justin cares he keeps trying to walk away until I see him walk up to Taylor she smiles at me, I ignore and walk to class
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The day goes by in a blur, I decide to stay since Justin is driving me, for some reason seeing him with Taylor makes me heartbroken why? I don't know
I wait outside for Justin, I feel a tap at my shoulder I turn to see Selena
"Hey Sel" I hug her lightly
"Aye what are you waiting for?" she raises an eyebrow confused
"Uh Justin he wants me to be there when he tells his mom" I frown
"Good luck" she giggles "any ways Hannah is having a party tonight you should come if any boy try's to make a move I will be by your side the whole time I promise" she begs
"Fine but only for a few hours" I smirk
She squeals hugging me, as soon as she pulls back Justin appears
"Come on" he obviously has a attitude he shifts on his heels impatiently
"Be good to her or else" Selena raises an eyebrow
Justin puts his hands up in defense I giggle, the walk to the car is silent
"Are you mad at me?" I blurt out
"No" he says coldly
We pass the familiar house in silence I wish he wasn't such an ass then maybe we could work things out
We pull into his drive way I get out along with my back pack
I follow Justin as he just opens the door a beautiful women comes out to greet Justin which I assume is his mom
"Ugh Justin you brung home another girl?" she groans
"No mom we have something to tell you well I do" he frowns as he knows he's gonna be in deep shit I feel bad
"She's pregnant" he closes his eyes waiting for a reply she looks shocked
"Justin for gods sake, you're dating Taylor, this poor girl, you're gonna have to break up with Taylor, I don't want it to be like your father and I you should at least make a effort to be together for me" she pouts, she puts her hands on her temples massaging them
"MOM! I'm not gonna fucking break up with Taylor" he groans
"Don't curse Justin and just try it out, I'm making dinner now, you're invited we can chit chat" she hugs me lightly with a welcoming smile, she disappears into the kitchen
Crap this is gonna be awkward.
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So was it longer than usual?
I wanted to post lol, it could've been longer but whatever
It's a school night and it's like midnight who cares
It's almost thanks giving yayy
Ooh and roller coaster is perfect not a surprise and 'Midnight Memories' (one directions new album) is so freaking perfect my heart melts lol
Comment on what you think and/ or for advice
Oh and I wanna know what that reaction little thing under this does please react I'm curious!
Feel free to message me whenever love y'all bye (:
(Btw their is no spell check this time so be aware of errors I will fix them tomorrow after school)
YOU ARE READING
affected // j.b.
FanfictionI changed the title; my previous title was bullied I'm in the process of editing. enjoy
