affected // j.b.

past

"What" I said not really paying attention to Anything. It's like I went numb "He's in jail. Justin is in jail" she grabbed my hand stroking it to help my nerves. I built up the nerve to talk again "why" I asked, "he got caught using drugs, and vandalism" she said. I shook my head, "he needs you. I know you love Harry. In fact you can keep dating Harry, just please come see him. He hasn't talked to anyone since you left" she said worried. "Mom this has happened before he's fine"

"but him acting up, doing drugs, vandalizing, that's not Justin." she crossed her arms "please just visit him" she asked. "Fine just don't tell Harry" I whispered turning around and going into the living room, I skipped Harry's questioning look and walked towards our room. I honestly don't want to go. I finally moved on, I love Harry.

I heard him come in behind me closing the door, since they live 3 hours away I have to stay the night at my moms new house so I don't have to drive back at midnight. "Why are you packing" he seemed sad. damn I didn't think of a excuse "my dad." I said out if panic "is he ok?" he said worried "yea he's fine but he's going through a rough time she wants me to visit him" I grabbed some pajamas, clothes, under garments, a phone charger and the other necessary products. "I hope you have fun ok? Call me, I love you." he kissed my lips, giving me a tight hug "I love you too" I sighed laying my head in his neck

once we arrived I pulled my car next to my moms, Tyler went out with friends, mom went to do business and I went to the guest room. it's only 2:00pm but I guess I can call it a day I changed into gray sweats and a plain white v-neck. I went into the bathroom scrubbed off my makeup and pulled my hair up into a pony tail. I stood staring into the mirror. my hair is at the center of my back, my hipbones show through, and I'm pale ugh. I laid on the bed staring at the ceiling thinking. I see Justin tomorrow and I don't want to. He's no good, he's a piece of shit. I fell asleep thinking about what might happen tomorrow

I rubbed my eyes to adjust to the sun beaming through the window I got up brushed my teeth, took a shower, applied my usual makeup. Mascara, blush, and a bit of power. I went into the room taking out the floral dress, doc martins, and undergarments I got dressed then took my phone off the charger. I let my hair down naturally straight but since I had it in a pony tail it has some small waved. I met my mom down stairs "are you ready to see him?" she asked as I sat "no. I don't want to see him" I huffed "you have to be there by 12, and it's 11:30 so eat" she ignored my comments, I sighed grabbing the cereal and milk.

I got into my car the place is five minutes away. I am nervous fuck. Why did I even agree to this. Justin is bad, he always will be. He can't keep a promise. He won't ever be able to. He's screwed up. I will never be the same Justin I loved as kids, he's different he always will be. No matter how much we use to fight I still loved him but I didn't realize it. But now, I don't have a ounce of love towards his cold heart.

I'm snapped out of my thoughts once I pull into the big building. I turned off my gps, I have my phone in my hand I'm squeezing it hard my knuckles are turning white. I check the time 11:56. I sign in, and they lead me into a empty room with a table, a security guard comes in explaining the rules which just so happen were no phones, he collected my phone into a Baggie as if it were evidence, he took it out of the room as he left another security guard came in, followed by a kid I hardly recognized. His hair was messy, he had bags under his eyes, he looks almost.. sad. The guard took off his cuffs that were on his hands.

he made eye contact with me, I swear he looked like he was gonna puke. But he's eyes got wider and brighter. I felt something drip on my arm, water. I'm crying. I wipe the tears but more come. They won't stop "kendall" he says in a husky voice. I don't know why I'm crying. I don't miss him, I don't love him, I don't have any feelings for him. But more tears came rushing down. I scanned him as he sat. He leans in for a hug, in my weak stage I took the hug we stayed like that for a while.

"I've missed you" he said interrupting the silence.

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My chapters are always short lol oops

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songs of the chapter

shades of cool - Lana Del Rey

good girls - 5sos

real girls eat cake - the janoskians

love robbery - Kalin and Myles