Slow Suicide

[9]

Different.

That was the word that would describe today.

Different.

  The air between them had shifted, but not in a bad way. Both of them could feel it as they stole glances at each other.

They obviously weren't complete strangers anymore. They weren't acquaintances either. So what were they?

Friends?

Best friends?

Or maybe they didn't have any kind of friendship at all. Perhaps they had more of a...relationship.

"So..." she cleared her throat awkwardly. "How are you today, Cig?"

He was silent for a minute, unsure of how to respond. "Uh, I'm okay. How are you?"

"I'm good."

  "That's good, " he nodded.

  She bit her lip as she stared down at her book. There was only about five chapters left but by the looks of it, she wouldn't be reading anything at the moment.

Sighing, he stood and looked down at her. "Shall we?"

  "What?" she furrowed her eyebrows. "Where are we going?"

  "I don't know. How about the swings?"

"Um, alrighty then, " she chuckled and he helped her up.

  As they walked to the swings together, she felt her hand twitch, inching towards his.

  He craved for her touch so when she reached for his hand, a jolt of joy spread over him.

  They squeezed each other's hands and smiled. His hand was big, rough while hers was small, soft.

  But he made her feel protected and confident.

  And she made him feel comforted and cared for.

Without letting go of each other, they sat on the swings and he moved closer to her. The park was mostly empty except for a few families roaming around.

"I haven't been here in a while, " he murmured. "In a long while."

She looked up at him, interested. "Yeah? Why not?"

"I had no reason to be here, " he shrugged.

"Oh."

"But...now, I do, " he smiled at her and she ducked her head, trying to hide her blush.

He gazed at their conjoined hands, his heart fluttering. "You know, Rainy, I haven't really told you this... But I really appreciate you."

"I really appreciate you too, Cig, " she grinned.

"And I want you to know that I'm extremely grateful that you're in my life. I would never hurt you in any kind of way and thank you for being there for me every day."

Her heart was about ready to jump out of its cage and into his arms. Never in her entire life had she heard someone say that to her or look at her the way he did.

Happy.

She felt amazingly happy.

It was such a beautiful word, she realized. Happy.

The wide grin on her face wouldn't falter as she stared at him. He tried reading her expression but there were so many emotions swirling in her eyes.

But none of them were bad.

There were no words to express her feelings, so she turned to actions.

She stood and as soon as she opened her arms, he knew what she wanted. He pulled her into a hug and leaned on the metal frame that held up the swings.

Breathing in his scent once again, she closed her eyes and let herself lean into him.

She let herself trust him.

Her hair had the sweetest smell in the world and he couldn't get enough of it. He held her tightly and laid his head on hers.

Why couldn't they stay that way forever, in each other's embrace?

They both wondered that when they pulled away but their hands remained together. She sat back down on the swings, which made him think of an idea.

  Grinning, he went behind her and began to push the swings lightly.

  Soon enough, she was high up in the air and her laughter vibrated in his ears. It was so contagious, her laugh, that he couldn't help joining in.

  "Come on. Swing with me, Cig!" she yelled happily.

  He pushed her one last time before sitting in the swing beside her. And he gradually got higher and higher as he swayed his feet.

  Finally, they were high in the skies and low on the ground together.

  They laughed their hearts out.

  Smiled until their cheeks were sore.

  Gazed at each other as much as possible before each blink.

  Most of all, they were happy.

  Simply, happy.