O'Malley's Sister

Chapter 43

That was it.

I knew it.

The solution.

If it worked for him, then god damn it, it'd work for me.

It had to...

After hours that felt like minutes had passed, I embraced Matty tightly.

I don't know what would happen out there.

I knew what I was about to do.
Matty seemed confused for a moment.

I hugged him as tightly as I possibly could.

"Sarah," he almost choked out, hugging me back.

"I'll be back." Maybe.

Matty sniffed and reluctantly let me go.

I felt his eyes on me as I traveled to the door, across the room.

I tip toed down stairs, finding what I knew would be on top the fridge in the very back.

A huge bottle of Vodka.

I wasn't daft, I have always known that my parents kept it there.

Every once in a while I would see Nick steal a swig or two from it.

It was heavy. The bottle was as tall as my forearm.

My intentions were quite clear with it.

For a moment, I leant back against the counter, contemplating bringing it back to the room, and drinking with Matty.

But he would probably stop me at some point and I didn't want that.

I figured that once I started, I'd not want to stop.

So instead, without a jacket, or anything except the clothing from the other day, I went to the front door, took a last look at the hall, remembering the day that Alex told Nick that he wanted me on tour with them.

I remember meeting his eyes.

The memory pained me.

Did he just want me on tour to mess with my head? Just to make me experience things that I could have gone my whole life without?

Is that what he wanted?

Because he succeeded.

He won.

She won, really.

Ari-...

I didn't even want to think about her name.

But, it was the push that I needed to take the step out the front door,closing it behind me quietly.

I stared at the cloudy sky.

There was no turning back.

I then began taking the slow steps forward, the heavy, toxic bottle in my hand.

As I took the steps down the side walk, in the direction of Libertine, I looked back at the house.

I stopped when I saw Matty in my bedroom window.

He stared at me, a depressed yet confused look on his face.
His eyes traveled down me, to the bottle in my hand.

His eyes widened, and I glanced down at the bottle before looking back at him, as he suddenly looked panicked, placing his hand on the window as he shook his head frantically.

'No.' He mouthed.

I felt my face contort slightly.

Then, I ran.