How Did We Get Here? ✔️

17. The past

*Trigger warning: this chapter deals with depression.*

17. The past

               

Sky hadn't seen Callen for four days. They both had midterms they needed to work for but usually, he would still call her late at night to hear her voice and chat about their day. Even if it was just to complain about an unfair teacher, they would at least talk. This time, it was different. He had only sent her a couple texts to reassure her that he was still alive and that he was just sick but when she had tried to pass by his room to bring him soup, he hadn't opened the locked door.

She had seen his roommate Ryan around campus and he assured her he just needed some time alone but that it wasn't about her at all. She still tried to go by his room every day.

On the fifth day without hearing his voice, she went to his room again, his favorite cookies in hand. There was no way she was leaving this time. She needed to see him to know he was okay.

She knocked at his door and when she didn't hear any response, knocked again louder.

"Cal, I know you're inside, please open the door, I just want to see you. We don't have to talk but at least just let me see that you have all your organs in place."

She heard some ruffling in the background and soon enough, Callen opened the door. He had his blanket wrapped around him, his hair was a mess spiking out in every direction and dark circles underlined his eyes.

She immediately wrapped her arms around him and, although he was surprised at first, he returned the hug.

"I missed you." Sky whispered in the comfort of his arms.

"I missed you too."

She released him and he let her in before closing the door behind him. His room was a mess, with food all over the floor and DVDs and books scattered everywhere. But Sky loved it because it represented Callen perfectly.

"Are you okay? Where were you these past five days?" She asked as he sat on his bed.

"Just... here and there."

And then, finally, it hit her. How could she be so dense?

"It's back, isn't it?"

He nodded wordlessly and she went to sit beside him.

"Cal, I'm sorry I didn't realize. Ryan told me you were sick but I didn't think..."

"It's okay."

"How... it is bad?"

He nodded again and her heart broke. She hated herself for not being there for him for five days when he had to deal with this.

He lay down and she saw the exhaustion in his features. She knew it wasn't just from the lack of sleep. His mind was torturing him and there wasn't anything he could do to shut it up.

"Do you want to talk or should we just watch a movie?" She asked, unsure of what was best to do in this situation.

"Movie." He mumbled.

So she put one on and she knew he wouldn't watch any of it but maybe it would be better than the noise of his own thoughts. Sky wrapped her arms around him and they lay there for a while, just knowing that they were there for each other and that, together, they could overcome this.